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Help. Sex with Animals.
January 5, 2013
7:17 am
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sillybillysilly
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January 5, 2013
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Hello. I have a topic that I know might disgust a few people, I personally know that it disgusts me, but I'm really seeking help about it. I'm not prepared to go to a professional counselor, as I'm not comfortable discussing this in person at all. When I was younger, I had a deep love and connection with animals, I always had animals in my life and around me. I felt a connection to them that was deep down to my soul. As I grew a little older, and began realizing things such as sex and love, I began experimenting with my dog at the time, which I know some people are going to say is okay, I was young, I wanted to know about sex, ect, but as I got older, the feelings I had for animals stayed, they might be subdued at times, or dissapear from my mind for long periods, but they were always there. I'm a lesbian, as well, I've known about my orientation for years and years now. I'm also a very low esteem, shy, reserved, person. When I get uncomfortable, I lash out or just completely withdraw into myself. I'm attempting currently to seek therapy online for anger management as well, but anyway. I got well up into my teens, as I am 19 now, and continued to find myself every once in a while having those feelings again. My girlfriend at the time, whom I've recently broken up with because of some of these issues, knows and has known about my problems and has accepted them with such grace that I have to say she is the most amazing person I've ever met. She's never judged me for anything I've done, though she admits what I've done with our pets, while I was dating her at the time, is akin to cheating, which I don't deny, it is. I'm just basically asking for advice, help, counseling, on what to do and how to stop having these feelings so I can regain my confidence in being alone with my pets. I love them and don't want to keep harming them like this. I've even gotten so afraid that I've notioned a few times to put them up for adoption to good, better homes, where I know they'd be away from me. I also want to regain the love from my girlfriend. I've put her through too much for her to bear, and it's also killing me inside. She's such a perfect, gracious, kind person to me, and I've let her down time and time again. I want all of this to end, so we can pick up the pieces and regain our love and trust. I want her to be able to trust me around my dogs, as I want to be able to trust myself. Thanks to anyone who reads this and can help me.

January 6, 2013
10:21 am
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dop
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December 20, 2011
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I am sure this is uncomfortable for you to post. At
19 and trying to figure out who you are what you are and where do I fit in is
tough for anyone this age. You have a few extra things thrown in so at times it
becomes a little over whelming. My best take is you have somehow connected the
love of animals to your sexual identity. This probably happened at the age when
your sexually identity was being developed. Being a lesbian in society
creates confusion and acceptance issues in itself. You mentioned you were shy,
have low self esteem and are reserved. I am thinking that you probably struggle
with expressing yourself. This is where your disconnect may come in and the unrealistic
connection with animals occurs. You may have trust issues and your connection
with animals developed out of the unconditional acceptance that animals present.
You stated when you get uncomfortable you lash out or just withdraw. This is
your fight or flight response. You perceive too many things as being a threat. It
basically stems from your inability to properly assess and cope in certain
situations. A therapist can help you learn coping skills for this.  You lash out to protect yourself and get
whatever the threat is to back down or go away. You withdraw because you want
to be somewhere safe. I know it must be uncomfortable to divulge this with someone
but it is what you need. A therapist wouldn’t view this the way you think. From
their perspective they are doing what they have been educated and trained to
do.

Hope this helps, Dop

Shinning light tends to have a better clinical understanding
of things maybe he/she will post.

January 9, 2013
6:35 am
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ShiningLight
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February 9, 2011
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sillybillysilly,

 

It may be difficult at first but whether you like it or not only a professional can help you with your current condition. If you really want to change for the better then do everything to achieve that help. Dop is right, counselors/therapists have different views than what ordinary people usually have so don't be afraid to approach and consult your condition to them. They are the best people who can help you and give you the proper treatment and advice. You have already opened up yourself here so might as well seek the support from your family or friends. Take one step at a time. Also, if your girlfriend truly loves you, she should support you no matter what and help you recover from your condition. Don't worry, you are not alone in this journey. As long as you have the determination to get better then you'll do just fine.

 

Wishing you well.

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