Avatar
Please consider registering
guest
sp_LogInOut Log In sp_Registration Register
Register | Lost password?
Advanced Search
Forum Scope


Match



Forum Options



Minimum search word length is 3 characters - maximum search word length is 84 characters
sp_TopicIcon
Help Me Stop Communicating With Him
August 23, 2007
11:41 pm
Avatar
_anonymous
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 8
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

SadMike- Each day that goes by gets a wee bit easier. I know in good time I will get over him. Still not there yet.

lala- your damn right. If you go back to him U will have nothing good coming your way. You dont need to walk away physically you need to walk away mentally. Get a restraining order then call 911 and hit him right between the eyes in his running lights if he is stupid enough to try to have another round with you. Lonley I can understand. I dont get that way because I have my kids. And my friends. I stay really busy. My heart doesnt skip a beat when I hear from my husband I just think "what does he want this time". The more he writes the more he calls the dumber he looks to me. He wrote me a letter about how under handed it was for me to file for divorce. He does not want to admit that I am pulling up stakes. I am just telling him a few things here and there and will let him figure it out. I am not divorcing him in malice but because I need to protect myself. When I hit him with that news he changed his tune in a heart beat. But the gig is up. It doesnt matter what he does or says I am divorcing him. Legally this jerk would have a field day with me if I didnt.

turnabout- For some of us folks present company included we wouldnt know "healthy" if it jumped up and bit us on the nose.

Horsegirl- HP! I am still dreaming of horses. This emotional bottom you have hit does this mean you are on your way up or down? What keeps you stuck? Emotionally I am on my way down in some ways up in the others but I still havent cut the ties yet. Just so I can avoid the inevitable grieving process. EWWWW.

August 24, 2007
11:20 am
Avatar
horsefly
this is off....be on this forum for years....not just since last year..we can email each other Now? that Nappy is long gone....
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 3
Member Since:
September 27, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Destiny, I meant the emotional bottom I hit when I left him and for quite awhile, but I am much much emotionally stronger now. Dreaming of a Shetland Pony baby? Now that would be somtething , while we were children my cousin had a dapple grey welsh pony, I even remember it's name....(Defender). Sometimes I can remember things a million years ago, but can't remember what happened 3 days ago. teehee Love, horsefly

August 24, 2007
2:37 pm
Avatar
_anonymous
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 8
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Horsefly- I have a problem with my memory to. I dont know why. My kids have to tell me where i parked and remind me of things. Maybe cause of going into menopause. I get my periods hardly ever. I love baby ponies. They need so much training and attention that they keep me busy. Plus I get to bond with them.

Sometimes emotionally you dont sound to good. I worry about that when you post.

I am sad. My 21 year old daughter is in jail. She is pregnant with my second grand child. The case is still in court. I hope I dont have to wait too much longer to find out what the outcome is. She uses drugs. She needs to be there. She needs to hit rock bottom. Her dad just died 6-28-07. I miss her sooo much. She inherited a lot of money. Dad was in homeland security and had a huge life insurance policy. I am glad she cant get the money for another month or so.

August 24, 2007
3:49 pm
Avatar
horsefly
this is off....be on this forum for years....not just since last year..we can email each other Now? that Nappy is long gone....
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 3
Member Since:
September 27, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Mg Destiny, I am sorry you have this going on. I imagine I would be kinda sad too. You say she is pregnant too. Well, I will say a little prayer for you right now. Yes, I still have emotional problems.....Not just because of him though. I am messed up pretty bad from my horsebites. This limits my activities.....just driving somtetimes is a big deal. I use to be so atheletic.....Extremely ....So my whole life has changed and I don't know what I can or not do anymore. Horses are in the life I left behind with him.......Well, I sometimes get sad when I see people doing things like playing ball or simple things people take for granted. I use to play guitar,,,,I can't anymore......It is amazing what people take for granted.....You don't know what you've got till its gone..........But I do have hope...Maybe these doctors I am about to see will be able to help me. So I get emotional wondering where my life is anymore. Every thing is trial and error with my arm and shoulder. I think I can use it and try and then I am not able to use it again for days because of the pain. You are always asking me about me so I thought I would try to explain some, HP! horsefly

August 24, 2007
4:20 pm
Avatar
risingfromtheashes
st regis falls, ny
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 14
Member Since:
September 24, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

destiny -

you seem to care so much about so many people that "need" you (daughter, husband, animals)....what about you? who cares about you? who takes care of you?

You are sad for so many other people - how do you feel about YOU?

One of the things I learned about being codependent is that we are so busy fussing over others, that we forget about looking at our own needs.

OR maybe we don't WANT to look at our own needs - maybe looking in the mirror scares us? maybe focusing on others makes it easy for us to not work on ourselves.

My mom used to chastise me cuz I was so critical of my aunt. My aunt was the most negative person in the world. She had criticism about everything.

My mom used to tell me I was the same damn way. In fact, by criticizing my aunt, I WAS being critical myself.

I used to hate it when she said that to me.

But it was true - not any more.

It's sort of like that whole thing about pointing a finger at someone and having four pointing back at ourselves....often we are as guilty as the person we are blaming.

My point is - so many people NEED destiny - but right now - DESTINY NEEDS DESTINY.

Part of detaching from your husband (and your daughter) is taking focus off of them - their calls, their letters, their needs, their futures - and focusing on you - YOUR needs, YOUR future, YOUR recovery.

You probably have alot of work to do to recover - to get stronger - to rebuild your life - to rebuild your finances.

All the energy you spend on them - is lost on yourself - it's wasted. You won't get it back in return.

BUT

if you spend more energy on you - you will be rewarded TENFOLD - you will get it back in return.

Next time you get the call - think to yourself - is this worth my energy? should I be doing something more productive? more healthy? more healing?

Next time you slip into wondering "what if" mode - into thinking about his future - into dissecting what he said, trying to analyze it - into worrying about how to handle him when he gets out - ask yourself if it's worth this energy you are spending - what could you be doing for YOU?

It's hard - often we feel like we don't deserve that attention - or we don't feel comfortable with it - or we are afraid of what we will see if we truly look in the mirror.

But we have to - it's our chance for a happier healthier life without all these negatives that drag us down into the pits with them.

Your husband has MANY months of incarceration to go - are you going to continue in limbo wondering "what if"...or spend months trying to figure out if he's changed or not...or spending months listening to the same old same old coming out of his mouth?

You should be energizing and empowering yourself.

You are taking steps - I do see that...don't think I don't.

Just trying to give you a huge pep talk and help you "stop communicating with him".

Next time he calls ask yourself "what benefit will I have in talking to him? will it fills his needs? (always does), will it fill MINE????"

it's ok to be selfish - despite what he may say. Know he won't meet your needs - he's already said he doesn't know how he can....so ask yourself - is it worth the time on the phone with him - or could you be chatting with wonderful people online - grabbing some rays of sun - doing some gardening?

August 24, 2007
5:34 pm
Avatar
_anonymous
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 8
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Rising- I feel like I will be so empty without them. That I will loose the protection of my family. I already dont work. Cause I have seriouse mental problems. I wish I could over come them. But I cannot process info.like others. I am out all kinds of money. I am trying to find an area of nursing that is not so challenging. The worst part is my kids no child care. I did go on a diet and lost 6 pounds. I did change my diet to a healthy one. I tried ALANON but drove me crazy sitting there listening to these women who are really codependents stories how they are so proud of themselves for putting up with some alcoholics BS. All I said in the meeting was I was there but I wanted out of the relationship with him. I think if I found a good distraction I could do it. I thought my horse would be one but the people that ran the ranch drove me crazy with their rules. And so did some of the boarders with their obnoxiouis behavior. I do have a garden and I eat the apples from the trees and the tomatoes, I gave away my green peppers to the neighbors. No I dont enjoy talking to them. I feel guilty about my daughter not about my husband. But I know she has to learn a lesson. I want a baby pony but I feel guilty to spend the money.

horsefly- That is sad. Loosing your physical abilities so suddently. I know that only extremly fit people can put up with training race horses. It is not for the faint at heart. Can you compensate with the other arm and shoulder? My 14 year old was born with a neurological problem that leaves him with weak upper extremities but he does play the guitar (night and day). I love the guitar and his singing. I just dont do anything cause I am lazy.

August 24, 2007
5:59 pm
Avatar
horsefly
this is off....be on this forum for years....not just since last year..we can email each other Now? that Nappy is long gone....
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 3
Member Since:
September 27, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Thank You Destiny, I believe I will be able to do alot more someday. I believe I will ride horses again. But It has been 2years since the bites and I must see what this last round of doctors say first. I have just learned how not to aggravate my situation. It pisses me off alot, to be honest with you. Some days I don't do anything but sit in a recliner with a heating pad. 24/7 maintenence. This has been the biggest challenge I have ever faced. I am just trying my best here. Thank God my family is very supportive and I have friends......The hardest part is my denial.....I think young but My body says no.......HP !! horsefly

August 24, 2007
6:17 pm
Avatar
_anonymous
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 8
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Chronic pain is horrible. Have you been to a pain control clinic? What about physical therapy. I have pain in my shoulder and right arm. My left toe is like anesthesized from pain from my lower back (nothing like yours). I like hot water and massage. Exercise helps. Did you have surgery? With ortho stuff it can take like 2 years before you know the outcome.

HP! And lots of soft pony hugs.

August 24, 2007
7:19 pm
Avatar
horsefly
this is off....be on this forum for years....not just since last year..we can email each other Now? that Nappy is long gone....
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 3
Member Since:
September 27, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Thanks Horsepal, I love hot water and heat. That works the best. I just need to be patience a little bit longer for the insurance to kick in. I have been dealing with this so long it becomes normal.........I am worried about the horse season that is about to kick in. This will be the first year this fall I havn't worked with horses. Yeah I worked in my condition last year, but now it is worse. I am not sure how I will handle it. I must find other avenues. Atleast for now. I sometimes hate the weekends because I don't know what to do......I mean that horses use to be all I did. So I can I can learn new things. Thank You so much for listening, HP! horsefly

August 24, 2007
8:32 pm
Avatar
horsefly
this is off....be on this forum for years....not just since last year..we can email each other Now? that Nappy is long gone....
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 3
Member Since:
September 27, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Well Destiny since I am going full gallop here, During the time of the icident and what it lead upto, I moved back in with my boyfriend of 10 years. Since I was homeless ( lost my jobs and my place) . He is a mailengnent Narcissict ( however you spell it), cruel and deceiving. Of course it became impossible for me to live with him again. By then I had moved in and out 4 times. I know it is about as crazy of a codependent - Narcissist relationship you could imagine. I finally blew and was escorted out of his house by the cops. No, I was not arrested just humliated ( his favorite tactic). I never went back except for my stuff. Now my dog and I just stay at friends and family houses. I moved to another town......I just won the WC hearing and will recieve treatment and back pay soon,,,,How horsey is that ? It has been quite the ordeal .....what horrified me the most was I did not know he had a mental disorder....until I researched it and found this site too. I confronted him and he flipped out and has hated me ever since. A decade wasted. So I am just picking up the pieces of a broken past. He has the horse world sewed up here. I left my few friends and if I go back there i will only see him again......So here I am.....I will probably have to have some form of shoulder replacement. That could be my only chance of recovery....of course physical therapy. We will see...havn't gotten there yet.....Other than that Welcome To My World! So I just hang around here alot because I can relate to everyone........HP! horsefly

August 24, 2007
8:43 pm
Avatar
horsefly
this is off....be on this forum for years....not just since last year..we can email each other Now? that Nappy is long gone....
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 3
Member Since:
September 27, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Destinyhorse, Maybe that will help you stop communicating, See he was a true charmer and abuser. I saw just what I wanted to see. He molded me. I adorned him. He used me. He played me. He would charm my socks off and then turn into my worst nightmare. I put up with it because he had me and knew it.....this went on 10 years. People would warn me, I wouldn't listen. I thought I loved him. I was a fool. I have learned that they are just a waste of our precious time. I met him when I was 39 ,,,I will be 50 next month. What a waste of energy. They are not worth all these tears we all cry.....horsefly

August 25, 2007
2:03 am
Avatar
_anonymous
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 8
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Horsegirl- HP!!. I am happy to hear you won your WC case. Now you have to apply for Social security benefits. So that you will have some $ when the WC benefits run out. SS takes a long time to process. Sounds like you would be eligible. Then when you have low income you can become eligible for HUD apartments at a discount rate. They are subsdidized. For people with low income. There is a Site on the internet. Then U can live independently. SS also give you medicare insurance. What kind of dog do you have? I miss my chow. Sounds like me and my husband. Always fighting, the police being called. Him leaving for days on end and coming back. Insane. Absolutly insane. He threatened to call the police on me a time or two, but I took the phone and called on him. The neighbors thought we were horrible. Then we would scream and yell all day. I will be 47 in December. Just taking each day as it comes. Glad I had my kids. Now I have one grand daughter and one on the way. I went from living in a home to a studio. What I could afford. I rented out my house. But we are happy. The worst thing I did was throw some of my husbands stuff outside cause he would make me mad being all hopped up on morpehine and a case of beer. Now I got rid of everything he owns. Serves him right. He had it at a location other than my house and did not pay me rent. My husband is in jail so it is hard to communicate. Which is good. One time we were at a camp ground and I yelled at him late at night and got a ticket for disturbing the peace, but I took it to the rangers office and got it dismissed. I realize now he was not worth it. More trouble than he was worth. I am sooo glad I dont live with him any more. What kind of mental illness did your b-f have? I think my husband is 3 frys short of a happy meal but I am not sure exactly what his problem is. I have a mental problem, but I am not violent or irresponsible. Getting some workers comp $ will hopefully make you feel better. You deserve it after all you have been through. I am in chronic right scapula pain. Better in the morning gets worse at night. Alcohol would help but I quit drinking it at night for fear it would lead to other things. I only had a shot. Do you take any meds for the pain?

Hugs from Destiny

August 25, 2007
10:15 am
Avatar
horsefly
this is off....be on this forum for years....not just since last year..we can email each other Now? that Nappy is long gone....
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 3
Member Since:
September 27, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Destinyhorse, You are so full of questions? I appreciate your concern very much, I have followed your story so I know alot about you. Don't see your mental problems being anyway close to my EX. He was more or less Narcissist/sociapath. But really a true blue Bully Narcissict. I think he is the rare form. A touch of schziprenic. That is part that is hard for me to get over.....how srange and weird he was , not because I want him back, I knew it then but stuck around trying to figure him out. But I was addicted to him like heroin. I file for my S.S. 18 months ago...........When I found out how serious my condition was......Nobody would hire me anyway, I have been percribed so many and many perscriptions that I don't even fill them any more. Except for my mood stabilzer and sleep medication. Since the injuries my health is a big concern. My blood pressure has soared. I am waiting to get to one doctor who will put me in order. I was just plain healthy before. Now , everyone wants me to take a pill and go away. But soon enough I will. Basically, I keep naprosyn in my system always. This is propably burning hole in my stomach, I just feel like puking to think if I actually took all the pills that are percribed to me. This is one subject that has been bothering me alot....glad you brought it up . Although I love to drink wine I hav e had to cut it out .......It doesn;t do well with my meds I am taking and my blood pressure. Please I sound like I am in a nursing home. I have several horror stories with my ex about our horses......part of my decision to leave him. Well enough about me for now. Once you start to smell shit it is time to go.....I stuck around long enough to be covered in it. I barely made it out. Did I tell you he threaten to kill me? Thsi time I believed him. I think that is why he called the cops, so he wouldn't beat me to death. Seriously. I am not the type to keep my mouth shut. Well I am very concerned about your daughter. I know lesson has got to be learned but it is still hard on you........my nephew in in jail too. I also understand you when you say .....finding something or someone else would help you forget him. Me too. But until I get myself straighten out I don't like to be around people. It is just too much to explain when they ask questions. I am usual in a wrist brace or a sling. I think it would be easier to tell them I got bit by a alligator. People don't know the kinda horses I have been dealing with......but you do. Thank God and You, It is nice to have ahorsepal and have a chance to talk about the horse world with. I have been horsesick several times in my life...but this has been the longest. HP! horsepal

August 25, 2007
11:13 am
Avatar
_anonymous
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 8
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Horsegirl- HP!!. I am glad that you applied for SS. It takes a couple of years for them to decide a case. But once they do it is nice to finally get some $ coming in. I know what u mean about MD's writing all kinds of perscriptions. Naprosyn will burn a hole in your stomach. Thats why I cant even take Motrin. The blood pressure thing definatly needs meds. Even though far back into my mind I wish I could just get involved with another man I truely dont have the desire nor do I make the effort. I dont care that much for men anyways. My attitude is I dont care what they want but whatever it is they wont get it from me. Basically someone to put up with their shit. This man you were with sounded dangerous. 100% controlling like you were an extension of him, some tool to be used in whatever manner he choosed. I dont go around people cause I dont feel the need. I just work at my stuff alone. I saw a girlfriend of mine that I have known for 33 yrs. but she is married to a man 10 years younger than her and only wants to talk about her issues. She never wants to listen to or help me with mine. My daugter is in jail going through the courts in regard to a Felony hit and run with seriouse injuries, driving with no license, and 2 misdemanor drug related charges. She needs to be there. So she can quit using. She is pregnant. I am sure if she continues in jail pregnant I will petition for the baby. She just turned 21. Hung out with the wrong crowd. I hope she learns her lesson. I am glad you did make it out of your last relationship. At the best it would have remained the same. There is no upside with men like that. Believe me there are plenty like him to go around. I think it is very much unreported.

August 25, 2007
12:41 pm
Avatar
horsefly
this is off....be on this forum for years....not just since last year..we can email each other Now? that Nappy is long gone....
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 3
Member Since:
September 27, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Get This Destinyhorse, 7 years ago the ex bashed my head in the floor 3 times. I thought I had provoked him so later I forgave him.....hello? If freaked him out that he lost controll. Afraid of being exposed. He never laid ahand on me since. Just pulls me around now and then for no reason. After I moved out on my own back then, he lured me back and then it was mind wars for the last 6years. Last December he brought home a horse for me at his farm, the horse was lame. He is a trainer ( he knew this) but acted like he didn't. I was injured then but still riding some. The horse stayed in pain for 2 weeks and he would get mad if I said anything. I would have to go out in the pasture to help it find the barn to feed it. It was horrible.......He did this on purpose and nobody can tell me he didn't. Once he gave me a riding horse and then gave it to some else that I hated the next day. Go Figure.........Then he would turn around and do something shitface nice for me.......these are just a few examples.........I was always confused but I was isolated with him. He smoked pot all the time. He was working for the corp of engineers. A government job and plus a horsetrainer. That is how he could afford to have racehorses. It is all so sick......I thought he was doing other drugs on the side was what his problem was.....but no that wasn't it......he masked his Mental with drugs.......I smoked alot of pot back then just because I was around it so much......I always did at the barn......I think all of the past 10 years is what lead up to my diagnosed being bipolar and PTSD. I'm lucky I am not in a state hospital. Just a few carrots here to nibble on. Pretty horseshitting huh? After I was disabled he treated me ok at first because are friends were watching.......but he never was emotionaal there for me anyway......but that was when I realized how much........ I was mistaking love for sex.....I had reach apoint in my life that I needed emotional support and he was a jackass.........Yeah, I could go on and on about it all because he is scary......he doen't have friends really.....they are intimidated by him.....He picks up girls here and there and just uses them.....trust me I know him well. I am sure he thinks I will be back for more....I am trying to come up with a new life so I will never see him again. Gee wilikers , horsepal. I guess I opened up big time here. I never thought I could even talk about him this much without running and hiding under the bed. ......How long to you think you daughter will be in the slammer? Do you even know yet....Bless your horsepicking heart.........HP! horsefly

August 25, 2007
1:06 pm
Avatar
_anonymous
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 8
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Horsefly- This guy sounded like he treated you like you did not even exist. Like you were a posession. Not a highly prized one either. What mental disorder do you think he had? He sounds like an intelligent person. He sounds like a sociopath and narcissist. Worse of all dangerouse. He emotionally abused you and intimidated you. What was the big attraction? Was it your love for horses? Or was it because he was a good provider? Good looking? Yes men like that can cause you to have PTSD and depression. I have a thought process disorder have had it my whole life. Cannot relate to others. Always stand on the outside of people. Dont join in. Dont want to. Cant handle stimulation, music, TV, people yaking. So horses is something I can be around and enjoy peace and quiet. Pot smoking clouds ones thoughts. Then you dont have to deal with anything. I used to drink when my husband was around just to put up with him so I could fall asleep. But then he started drinking all my alcohol and I could not afford it so I quit.

August 25, 2007
3:55 pm
Avatar
horsefly
this is off....be on this forum for years....not just since last year..we can email each other Now? that Nappy is long gone....
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 3
Member Since:
September 27, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Destinyhorse, Leaping lizzards, I just made a huge post to you and pushed the wrong button and lost it. I will try again later....it was a good one too. HP! horsefly

August 25, 2007
3:58 pm
Avatar
_anonymous
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 8
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

I have had my computer freeze. It is annoying. Looking forward to your post

August 25, 2007
4:17 pm
Avatar
Matteo
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: 2
Member Since:
September 29, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Destinystar

I would like to paraphrase your own words to DanoPUd:

"You dont have to worry about letting him go because in reality you didn't go to jail, he did. You are involved with him because of your issues not his. Find a healthier and more available person or thing to focus on. When he calls dont answer the phone. Do not allow yourself to be his doormat. He has already abandoned you. Now you are free to find someone else."

I think - just take your own advice and apply it to your own situation. Good luck!

August 25, 2007
4:20 pm
Avatar
Matteo
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: 2
Member Since:
September 29, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

In addition, take your own advice to Mousey:

"This behavior is unacceptable. It is not right for you and you know it that is why you are posting here. (..) Instead of spending so much time trying to figure out why he does this stuff why dont you spend the same amount of time finding out why you are staying in a situation that does not feel good to you. You have to learn to accept your feelings not his. Now you are putting his feelings before yours and letting his reactions to your feelings rule you. Go to some co-dependent meetings. Learn how to stand up for how you feel and how to be like him and do what you feel is good and right for you."

I think your words are well worth consideration.

August 25, 2007
5:23 pm
Avatar
_anonymous
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 8
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Matteo- Take my advice and dont send me any more of yours. I am going to let the site coordinator know that I dont think you followed the guidelines because you just attacked me

August 25, 2007
5:25 pm
Avatar
_anonymous
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 8
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Matteo- Your response was also unsupportive and disrespectful. Again I will let the site coordinator know in the mean time please dont send me anymore communication again.

August 25, 2007
5:50 pm
Avatar
_anonymous
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 8
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Matteo- It is not up to you to decide what I post and it is not up to you to decide what advice other members need and dont need.

August 25, 2007
5:56 pm
Avatar
Matteo
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: 2
Member Since:
September 29, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Go ahead, Destinystar, and contact the site coordinator if you feel it's necessary. I didn't attack you in any way, I did nothing more than repeated your own words you've said to someone else; If you think they were harsh, perhaps the posters your words were addressed to might feel the same? Perhaps your response was "unsupportive and disrespectful" to them? What's good for the geese, should be good for the gander, don't you think so? In all honesty I didn't respect that kind of reaction from you.

By the way, this thread is a public forum and I can post here if I wish so, you like it or not.

Peace to you.

August 25, 2007
6:11 pm
Avatar
bevdee
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 259
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Destiny

I didn't see anything in Matteo's post that attacked you. Or even used stronger words than you have used to others in posts and other threads.

However it is a guideline or maybe a tip set out on this site not to tell another poster not to post to you. In a public forum, we don't have that kind of control. There haave been times I wished I did.

Can you ask yourself why her feedback felt attacking to you? Was it your perception of some sort of criticism? I don't need an answer, but the answer might help you in learning to communicate.

Forum Timezone: UTC -8
Most Users Ever Online: 349
Currently Online:
33
Guest(s)
Currently Browsing this Page:
1 Guest(s)
Top Posters:
onedaythiswillpass: 1134
zarathustra: 562
StronginHim77: 453
free: 433
2013ways: 431
curious64: 408
Member Stats:
Guest Posters: 49
Members: 111085
Moderators: 5
Admins: 3
Forum Stats:
Groups: 8
Forums: 74
Topics: 38627
Posts: 714438
Newest Members:
soofibeauty, lifesyncm, Thomas455, BTMkunze, Lifeisbetteronstilts, gndsurgical
Moderators: arochaIB: 1, devadmin: 9, Tincho: 0, Donn Gruta: 0, Germain Palacios: 0
Administrators: admin: 21, ShiningLight: 572, emily430: 29

Copyright © 2020 MH Sub I, LLC. All rights reserved.
Terms of Use | Privacy Policy | Cookie Policy | Health Disclaimer | Do Not Sell My Personal Information