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Hello Im new
October 15, 2006
7:47 pm
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wendy1973
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My step mom has directed me here even though she divorced my dad she is still here to help me unlike my real mom or dad, im 33 years old and live in a very abusive relationship with my husband my dad was (is) i dont know an alcholic my mom was too. they have been divorced since i was 2 and my grandmother raised me. I have 2 children that I love to death but I know I need help, my husband has put me in the hospital, destroyed our house and has made life unbearable. I just need some help everyone says its me, is it? am I that bad of a person? im so scared I will never be happy.

October 15, 2006
7:53 pm
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sleepless in uk
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Hello Wendy and welcome

There are many people here who will talk to you if you want to talk about what is bothering you.

You say your husband has put you in hospital so I am guessing there is physical abuse in your marriage.

There are a couple of threads here on just that subject and there are others who are going through that too.

Have a look through them and join in if you feel you want to. I am so very sorry to hear you are in that kind of pain and I hope you are safe...

Im glad that at least your step mother is there for you even if your parents arent

take care and keep posting and welcome to the site. I hope you gain something from it

love sleepless

October 15, 2006
8:01 pm
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wendy1973
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thank u I just think im going crazy i just want someone to love me and treat me good. its so hard to be at all, my life has never been right and it just keeps getting worse.

October 15, 2006
8:02 pm
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red blonde
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Wendy, Hello and welcome, also.

Sleepless is right. Read some of the threads, join in, but most of all: talk about what is bothering you or making you afraid. There are wonderful people on this site who will listen, tell you their stories and how they are dealing with their problems or have dealt with them. They do not condemn or judge, they are just wonderfully concerned and loving people. They will try to help in any way they can and will give advice. They do not tell you what to think, or feel, or do, unless you ask them and unless they feel that you (and your children) are in imminent danger.

Welcome, newbie!

Red

October 15, 2006
8:08 pm
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wendy1973
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thank u red,
this is all soooo hard for me sooo hard, my life has never been stable and now its in a shamble and i dont even know where to start I drink to make it go away ,i have anexity attacks im a mess, i have 2 beautiful kids that make straight a's and im the screw up.

October 15, 2006
9:13 pm
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chelonia mydas
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(((Wendy))),

I am glad that you are reaching out for help.

I don't think you are crazy- you have just been in crazy situations and may feel that way. You are worthy of a healthy relationship where you are not abused in any way.

I encourage you to leave your abusive husband ASAP. If he has already put you in the hospital, then it seems like you are in immediate danger. You kids are also in danger- even if he doesn't touch them, they see what he does to you and this will have an impact on them. There are resources, shelters and programs for you and your children- Please seek them out and use them.

I too am a 30something daughter of alcoholic/addict parents. I too have felt crazy- like it is all my fault for everything- that I deserve it- that it is my job to make everyone happy and I am not allowed to be happy myself.

Being abused is what you have known your whole life- but you are an adult now. You have the opportunity to leave and get you and your children to a safer place. You are a wonderful person who is worthy and deserving of love and happiness and to live a life free of abuse. You deserved better as a child- you deserve better as an adult- your children deserve better. Please seek help.

Here is the number for the National Domestic Violence Hotline 1-800-799-SAFE (7233)
They can help hook you up with local resources.

You are capable of happiness and taking care of yourself, but you need to get out of the abusive situation first.

You have my full support and I am here for you regardless of your decision.

Please keep posting and letting us know how you are doing.

Hugs,
Chelonia

October 16, 2006
10:26 am
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CAMER
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September 30, 2010
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Wendy, how nice of your step mom to direct you here.

You know it isn't YOU that causes the problems, being in a relationship with an abusive man...is a problem, that you need to get out of...him hurting you is his problem and it needs to stop...and only will once you and your children get away.

You need to love YOU enough to get out of this relationship, for you and your children...there are places to go and call (see the above post)....do it now.

You are a great woman Wendy, don't ever forget that & keep us posted on what is happening

((((hugs and support to you Wendy))))) Camer

October 16, 2006
2:52 pm
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newmoon
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Welcome, Wendy!

I'm pretty new here, too, and I hope you find the solace and strength to find that love your searching for - in yourself. I know it's there.

October 16, 2006
3:09 pm
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motherhen
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September 24, 2010
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Hello this is motherhen, I, believe i suffer from codependency. have my whole life. Coyld you please show me how to start loving myself and stop blaming myself if i can,t fix someone else.motherhen

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