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Hello ... I'm new here
March 15, 2007
1:42 pm
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Blue Sky Above
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September 24, 2010
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Hi Everyone,

I'm new and am a co-dependant. I believe I've always been one. I'm divorced, I just turned 39 (no children) and have fallen from the high of a new relationship which turned bad. I'm really trying, but thought I would try something new and am reaching out to you.

March 15, 2007
2:09 pm
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Shaney
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September 30, 2010
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Hi blue -

Welcome to the site :o). I came here two years ago when I was 39. I think we all have a codependent tendency within ourselves - but I've made so many friends here, and have grown quite a bit... so that codependency part of me is at least tolerable now :o).

How long was your most recent relationship?

March 15, 2007
2:27 pm
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mj
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September 29, 2010
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Hi Blue Sky!

Love YOUR nickname! Makes me want to sing 🙂 We have been having a book study on the Liberation Thread side for the past few months. You are welcome to join us and learn ways of helping yourself! Welcome to this site!

March 18, 2007
3:21 pm
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Blue Sky Above
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Thanks everyone for the warm welcome. Wow - it's been a crazy, crazy week!! I am so disappointed in myself. I allowed this guy to ruin my birthday, which was last Wednesday. I'm also very disappointed with myself because I leaned very heavily one of my best of friends (who is a guy). I know I weirded him out and he now views me as an unstable person. AND ... AND!!! He expressed yesterday, his feelings for me have changed and he now would like to see me romantically. This came as quite a shock as we communicate on a regular basis and it's always been clear we weren't each other's type. Our relation has ALWAYS been platonic. He hasn't been in a romantic or sexual relationship for quite awhile. We talked today and I told him I wouldn't want anything to jeopordize our friendship ... ever. He's so exceptional in so many ways and I would never ever want to lose him as a friend. Bottom line: Guys and girls are soooo very different!! Why did God create us this way?? He actually was hoping friendship with benefits!! For me, the benefits come as an entire package. Call me strange. What really hurts is he made me feel awful as he didn't express the words girlfriend or love as he's not sure (how could he be? he knows me so well). I'm not feeling very good about myself these days. On a positive note, we had a very good conversation today (he's an excellent communicator for a guy). He cares enough about me as a friend to respect my decision.

To give you an idea of my background: I'm smart when it comes to business but awful when I fall for a guy. I do have a history of falling for the wrong type of guy ... I've made plenty of mistakes.

Why must life be so difficult? I am trying.

March 18, 2007
3:26 pm
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ggfred4
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September 30, 2010
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Welcome blue sky....You are NOT strange at all. We must accept that each of us is unique. I started this site about 7 mos. ago and it has been the greatest learning experience and also has given me great comfort. Give it time and feel free to share whenever and wherever you want....Glad to have you here....gg

March 18, 2007
3:49 pm
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Blue Sky Above
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((Thanks gg))

March 18, 2007
4:00 pm
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Blue Sky Above
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Shaney - My last relationship ...

I actually ended an engagement about a year ago. It was a very quick engagement, I found a job near him, and then had to find a place to live. I jumped into the engagement because I started to see my ex-husband (didn't talk or see him for about 5 years), I realized I made a mistake rekindling, ended it and he ended up killing himself. Yes.

Thank God I have a somewhat supportive family.

March 18, 2007
4:35 pm
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TANKER
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September 24, 2010
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Hi Blue Sky
you are really lucky to have a friend like him . Guys have a hard time talking to girls about relationships . He has watched as you went trough your last one and has seen your ups and downs .His offer to expand your relationship may have been his way of making you feel wanted .He is a true friend and just what you need .who knows with time what will happen but he will be there to listen to you as a friend .Me I feel for a counselor who wants nothing to do with me and has the police after me now .
Life is funny

March 18, 2007
4:42 pm
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Blue Sky Above
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September 24, 2010
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Tanker, I thought so as well. But now, knowing he wants more, I'm very dubious. Is he a true friend or does he want something else??

Why does your counselor have the police after you??

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