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He wants only to be friends
May 23, 2007
12:14 am
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Nina009
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Hello everyone first time here. I have a very unusual relationship with a man for over 10 years!. We started as bf/gf but almost from the start, he stated to say, that I was not his type. We had sex on and off, and it was almost always me asking for it. I stopped asking 3 years ago. We don`t live together, but visit each other for weeks at a time, and sleep like brother and sister.
We are very good friends, and share everything, e-mail daily, phone calls, we travel all over. We laugh, we spend lots of time together and we don`t get bored. he is very good to me, and he pays for everything, BUT he says we will never have sex!. He is not with any other woman,(I know) but he talks about wanting to have sex with someone. He rather please himself than have sex with me!.
I tolerate the situation, because I love him, and I don`t think of sex much anymore.
But lately he is looking even to pay to a prostitute.
He is very handsome, but a very difficult person and he does not get alone with anyone!, only with me!?.
Well this is it for now. If I was going to ask for advise, it would be: DO I LEAVE A VERY GOOD FRIEND BECAUSE HE DOES NOT WANT TO BE INTIMATE WITH ME, OR I JUST KEEP HIM AS FOR WHAT HE HAS TO OFFER.... ONLY A FRIEND. I can see that I am very, very codependent and confused! THANKS

May 23, 2007
12:45 am
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loverbee
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Welcome nina. I think I could really help you because I have a very similar situation...well kind of. My ex and I were best friends for two years and then in a relationship for six years. We were so very in love but because I was his first and only, he began to get very antsy. He really wanted to explore because he just hadn't had the experience that he thought that everyone else had. We got to the point where it was very strange for us to be having sex because we both knew that he needed space. We slept together and were very affectionate and spooned when we slept but it the attraction was fading. Well not fading but being tested. We finally decided to see other people and the attraction came back because neither of us felt trapped anymore. My point is, I decided that the friendship was way to important to get hung up on the sex thing. There are plenty of people to have sex with that would want me because I am a very intelligent and beautiful woman. But I cared for him so much and he cared for me and we get eachother. I understand that it may hurt to accept this, but really what has changed. If you two can still be around eachother and feel comfortable and safe and have tons of fun, why not try for just a friendship. maybe this is just a sign that you need to start thinking about getting yourself something more when it comes to the intimacy dept. because he can't give that to you. But friendship is just as important sex if not more. So its something to think about. I would also suggest seeing a counsler to help make this transition. That is what I would do. Just some advice.

May 23, 2007
12:48 am
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thumkin
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That is such a tough situation. I know that I have guy friends that I love to do everything with but I could never have sex with them. I couldnt explain to you why, though. Its not cuz they are not good looking, but there is just something not there for that to happen. Sometimes its just that way.

May 23, 2007
12:51 am
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fantas
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Nina009...obviously he isn't just a friend. You are more emotionally vested in this "friendship" than he is. I think you first need to get very honest with yourself as far as your feeling for him are concerned and then decide if this is the kind of person you want to be in an intimate relationship with. From what you say, he sounds like an emotionally unavailable person to you. Does he act jealous when you date other people? Since he had already told you what he wants, I'd move on if I were you. Has he been a good friend to you in the 10 years you've known each other?

May 23, 2007
1:43 am
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Nina009
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He has been everything a woman wants in a man but not intimate!. I am attractive, and people tell me often, but to him I am not, he says it is not physical it is mental!?. I have had few man in this 10 years especially one and he still get VERY jealous, it is the most sore subject.
I can find man to have sex, but they only want that, and they don`t want to spend quality time with me like he does.
Things are getting worse, because we are going overseas to my country for 2 months, and we will be looking to live there permanently.
I have tried leaving him many times, but, I call him or he calls me.

May 23, 2007
11:56 am
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Nina009
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Thank you LOVERBEE. I accepted 3 years ago to just be friends, and we actually have a better relationship, because there was not pressure about sex. It only hurts very much when he says he wants to have sex, and talks about other women that he would like to be with, but he never does, because he has many rules, no smoking no tattoos, don`t talk too laud, don`t make noise with food, don`t listen to commercials, don`t slam doors, and many, many more.
He says over and over, that he will never find someone, because he is very difficult!... DAHHH!
THUNKIN, I know we don`t want to sleep with all our friends, but he only sees me and I see only him in a regular basis; it is very normal for a woman not to want to sleep with a man, but a man that has not have sex in years and sleeps with a woman that he loves and respects, and share every little detail in life, IT IS VERY WEIRD, and those are the words of anyone that knows him, even his mother.
Thank you FANTAS. Just writing here helps a bit.

May 23, 2007
12:20 pm
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risingfromtheashes
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here's my question - is he gay?

the reason I ask -

I had a very close friendship with a man many years ago.

and we had a very strong friendship...including the snuggling you talk about.

but we just weren't kissy kisy or had sex.

I just thought that he was a slow mover.

Anyway, in time, we moved into the realm of sex...but it was one sided...I gave, he received...orally or manually (trying to spare the details). I enjoyed it....he did too.

But eventually I wanted more. And felt shortchanged.

And eventually he gave in, but the intercourse sucked. It was a rare thing.

EVENTUALLY he gave in and admitted he was gay...that he was TRYING to love a woman like a normal guy...but that it just wasn't working for him.

This was five years.

In that time he had not had any thing going on with men...he surpressed it....was afraid of the stigma and the social stuff that comes with it.

He moved...we tried working things out later on....I even agreed to have men on the side if he couldn't please me enough and agreed to let him have his men.

But in the end, realized I was shortchanging myself.

I also had a best friend that was the BEST thing I had in my life...we were inseparable...but he jsut wasn't physically attracted to me...turns out the physical attraction was due to his lack of mental attraction - he wanted a woman who smoked, chewed her fingernails, had no esteem, had no education and no sense of what she wanted...so he could control the relationship. I wasn't that...so he wasn't attracted...but we made damn good friends.

You mention that you spend weeks at a time together...what happens when you are NOT together?

Here is the BOTTOM line -

can you be satisfied staying his friend? or do you truly want more?

knowing he can't, won't and isn't going to give you the type of relationship....is it fair to yourself to stay in it, knowing you will never be fully satisfied?

Knowing he won't change...can you see yourself in the same spot you are in - in another ten years from now?

Somewhere down the road, sex becomes unimportant...so, depending on your age, it may not be a big deal to stick around. You got the rest of the package...which could be more important than the sex.

But if you are young and need/want the sexual intimacy...or even if you are older and want it...you will continue to desire what you cannot have...and that is only you hurting yourself.

May 23, 2007
12:32 pm
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atalose
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I am thinking the same thing as Rising, is it possible he is gay?

Either way you are really short changing yourself with this guy. He may be one terrific friend but you want more and he is not capable of giving you what you want or need.

I also wonder what he does when you are not together.

When you say you both are traveling to your country and looking to live there permanently do you mean together or would you both be looking for separate residences?

Atalose

~~Hope has a place, but not above reality~~

May 23, 2007
2:03 pm
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loverbee
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I would kind of wonder the same thing about him being gay. Or he has women issues that he needs to overcome not because of you but maybe because of his mother or something? As for hurting you because of the fact that he talks about it with you, that is something you need to create some boundries with.

I am going to take you back to 7 months ago when we broke up. we both ended up going to this party in NYC with a bunch of our old friends for a reunion type thing. I was having so much fun and ended up getting tipsy but nothing more than that cause I don't like to drink much. Well, one of my friends had brought along his childhood friend. HE WAS GORGEOUS!!! I am talkin med school student, blue eyes, athletic build..the works. Anyway, he couldn't take his eyes off me all night and was really coming on strong. He put his arm around me at one point and I brushed it off but he didn't quit. My ex thought that I was going to hook up with him and was devastated because he had actually seen the beginnings of what he thought was going to be a one night stand. I didn't hook up with him at all. In fact i tried to just spend time with my friends. The next day, he was talking to one of my friends and he mentioned that it was wierd seeing me hooking up with another guy and he didn't know if he could handle that at all. My friend looked at him and was like
"are you crazy? She rejected his advances from the minute she met him to minute she left. They totally didn't hook up."
He was really relieved but then said, he was so good looking E, why didn't you hook up with him. I told him that I would never disrespect him and do that in front of him. No one night stand was worth my best friends friendship being lost. The point is, we made a boundry right then and there that we would not discuss it with eachother or do it in front of eachother. That way we can keep the friendship in tact. I advise setting boundries for the sake of the friendship.

May 23, 2007
2:38 pm
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Nina009
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No he is NOT gay!, he is always looking at beautiful women, and has a big collection of photos in the Internet. We are in constant contact, and if he would meet a woman, he would even tell me!. He has not have a home in over a year, he travels for his work and he stops at his parents or here with me. ( I travel with him sometimes, he would like me to be with him 24/7). Whenever he had someone, I heard the stories everyday, and all he did was complain about her. You See, we are supposed to be just very good friends so we have the freedom to do whatever we like, but when I do it, it becomes a very big deal. He has always want to live with me, but because of my work I can`t.
Now we are leaving together to live where my family is, and we will be sharing everything including the bed.
If anyone sees us they think "what a beautiful, loving couple". We were there last summer and my family liked him very much, because they sow he was very good to me.
I AM OKAY WITH NO SEX, MY HORMONES ARE CHANGING AND I DON`T LUST FOR HIM ANYMORE, (like I used to), it is that now on the eve or our trip, I sow he posted something in the net about finding a woman "to travel with".(he told me long ago that he wanted to do that, but seeing it for real it hit me hard!) This is why I am here writing!!!
You are so kind, thank you, I see how bad my story is when I write about him. He need medication (not taking any) because he suffers from depression like me, but I take medication for many years.
I think I don`t love myself, because I allow this to happen, but I am getting older and I don`t want to be alone, and I know sex will fade. My older friends say they wish their husbands would spend as much time as he does and don`t ask them for sex.
Sorry I am rambling now!

May 23, 2007
2:47 pm
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loverbee
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If you don't love yourself, that is somehting you should work on. whatever type of relationship you have with him isreally up to you. I would just recommend that you ask him if you can keep your new found love lives and dates and all and writing women to himself just because it is painful for you and you think that it could jeoparidize the friendship. Just a suggestion.

May 23, 2007
3:10 pm
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risingfromtheashes
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I honestly don't see that he is going to change.

and if he is seeking out other women online...it is a definite sign that he isn't going to change.

he has a beautiful woman sharing his bed...someone he cares for and has in his life in every other capacity...but doesn't want to have sex with her??? It doesn't make sense and feels like he is using you.

He has his cake and eats it too..he has a loving friend that gives him a place to stay when he is home from traveling...and who lets him travel without giving him a hard time...and he has sex with women he doesn't care about when he wants it.

I think he's got every bachelor's dream....a woman home waiting for him...a career with travel...and sex from women he doesn't have to commit to.

Perpahs he has commitment issues? And by not having sex with you, he doesn't have to commit to you...and by having sex with women online...he doesn't have to commit to them cuz he's not dating them.

the question is - is this what you want?

maybe the sex isn't as important...BUT there is a level of intimacy that it signifies that IS missing...and can you live without it?

Will he still be traveling once you move? And why the move? Will you be living together full time all the time?

May 23, 2007
3:29 pm
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StronginHim77
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Nina -

When I read this, an alarm bell went off in my head:

"...he has many rules, no smoking no tattoos, don`t talk too laud, don`t make noise with food, don`t listen to commercials, don`t slam doors, and many, many more. He says over and over, that he will never find someone, because he is very difficult!..."

You have just described the abusive husband I left 6 weeks ago. We were only married for 11 weeks and -- to this day -- I can't even figure out WHY he wanted to marry ANYONE. Within two weeks of the wedding, he was constantly criticizing me: I talked too loud, used the wrong burner on the stove, left the shower curtain too far open, after cleaning the bathtub, talked too loudly, laughed too loudly, closed drawers/cabinets too loudly, plumped my pillow too loudly...the list of everything that I did which annoyed/disturbed him was ENDLESS.

Plus, he steadily declined in sexual interest in me...from 4x daily on our wedding day, to ignoring me for a week to 10 days at the end. Having done some homework, I believe he is mentally ill. He demonstrates alot of narcissistic traits, some obsessive-compulsive traits and is HIGHLY controlling. By the way, highly controlling men frequently withhold sex from their "partner." This is because sex makes them feel too emotionally vulnerable/threatened. They prefer to masturbate. (This was the case with my husband.)

For the record, I am a highly intelligent, educated, attractive and well-dressed woman. Like brainy "arm candy" for my age group. He wanted me, but he wanted to completely control me...thus, the criticizing, the "rules," etc. I escaped. I hope you do the same. You deserve a NORMAL relationship with a man who is mentally healthy. This man is not.

- Ma Strong

May 23, 2007
3:40 pm
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fantas
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Hi Naina...you said that he has this list of things that his women must meet before he can commit to them. The list is an impossible one for anyone to meet which tells me that he really doesn't want to be with anyone. He is sleeping with other women and telling you all about it. He seems okay with this arrangement because it's working out greatly for him. The question is why is this okay with you? Why are you unable to hear what he has been telling you for 10 years and finally why are you unable to accept him for whi he really is? If you accepted him for who he is other than who you want him tobe, you wouldn't wish for him to give you what he is not capable of giving you right now. Hence the true friendship part. Right now, you have held yourself hostage to his whims, which is very truthful and upfront about. If it's too hard to be his friend like he is, for both your sakes you should go your separate ways instead of moving in together. You'll end up resenting each other, he will resent you for pressuring him and you'll resent him for not meeting your needs. I hope you get clarity on this issue. It must be hard trying to think about it while you are living it. Hang in there and keep sharing your thoughts. Have considered attending Codependents anonymous?

May 23, 2007
3:43 pm
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atalose
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Nina,

Let me ask you, what kind of things do you do for him? Do you cook and clean and do laundry? Or does he do those things?

What kind of things does he do for you?

Atalose

~~Hope has a place, but not above reality~~

May 23, 2007
3:57 pm
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nappy
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Nina009,

I just want to welcome you to this site. By reading your thread, this is the place to be IF you want some help or some type of answers.

You say that he wants only to be friends. And maybe that is true and maybe it was true from the beginning because you stated that he had already told you that you wasn't his type. But you was his type to have sex with.
You stated that you had to ask for sex from him and that maybe true because you only had sex when HE was in the mood.

Umm........

It is good that you know that you are codependent. That is a very good thing. Before you start reading about codependent. Just by reading your thread, codependent people tends to feel that they can make the other person be who they want them to be.
Codependent people feels that they can change the other person. Codependent people are caretaker in the bedroom.
You really need to let this person go as a friend because I can see right now that you are the one that is going to be hurt and I mean hurt bad because you are calling this person a friend and when you get to that stage, you are going to need a true friend to pick you up and I just don't see this friend doing that because he is going to be the cause of your pain.
If you read some of the other threads, you will see written time and time again and over and over again that you need to work on yourself. You is playing a dangerous game and someone is going to get hurt.
Nappy!

May 23, 2007
4:06 pm
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risingfromtheashes
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he also sounds very controlling...getting upset when you date others, but dating regularly himself...and telling you about it no less. And you say he is hard to get along with and nobody can measure up to his requirements.

Sounds like a control freak...perhaps even a narcissist.

May 23, 2007
5:45 pm
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Nina009
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Yes RISING, Big huge commitment issues!, exactly what you guys says, and he is VERY CONTROLLING, that is exactly true, and he is very narcissist, everything is about him.
In 10 years that I know him he has slept with 2 women only,(and I am almost certainly of that) and that was when I was doing the same thing. I had maybe 6 to 7 affairs, and one guy I still see few times a year.
I am very good to him, and do nice things for him, but he does help me in every way, and buys me anything I want, he treats me with respect. He said last week that I was the one to tell him never, ever will we have sex again. It was once that he pushed me away, and that was the last time I touched him ever again.
There are some other issues, you don`t know, I will tell you later more. Like I still live with my husband, and my son, but like roommates, and that bothers him a lot. it is difficult situation for everyone. living in this part of the country is very expensive, and he can`t understand why I do it, and it is $, and i never felt safe to leave because he is so difficult and we tried before and he is very unstable man. this gets difficult to explain. I never really talked about all this. thank you for allow me to vent all this.

May 23, 2007
7:08 pm
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fantas
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Nina, I am glad you are talking about it now. It sounds like you have a lot of things you need to work out with yourself before you even think about living with another man. I sense a pattern of unavailable men into your life. Other than this man what other support do you have for yourself? I wish you all the best. This is a great site to be on. The people here understand where you are coming from.

May 23, 2007
8:03 pm
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StronginHim77
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Wow. No wonder he has hooked up with you. You are -- legally and technically -- unavailable. He doesn't have to commit because you are married. He would also not like sharing your attention with your child. How old is your son? Is he grown now?

As an added bonus, it appears that he does not have financial responsibility for you. In short, he is getting all the perks with none of the responsibilities. A "win-win" situation for a narcissist. Geez. I am glad that you are talking about this with us. It will help you so much to see the "craziness" of this man, once you see it in black & white.

You deserve happiness. You deserve more than this man can (or will) give you.

By posting here, you are beginning to stand up for yourself and for your future. Don't stop. We are here for you.

- Ma Strong

May 23, 2007
9:32 pm
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Nina009
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MASTROG, he sound like a carbon copie of your ex. Or he was like that, we stated from 3 or 4 times a day to nothing. It is scary to even read this.
Craziness all right!. Now we decided to go try living in my country, I know he probably won`t last even the 2 months! I refused to sell my car untill I know things are going to work out. I work but I don`t make much, and have some money saved. He will pay for all expenses.
I was very confident things would work, untill I sow that post in the net. Now I am very afraid of the outcome. He will be here tomorrow, and I don`t know how I am going to hide this feeling I have, he can read me like a book!
I think I am just goint to think we are going on a vacation and not to try to find something to do for the future!.
I don`t think there is anyone out there for me, I am very picky, and I know now esactly what I want in a man.
I wish I found this site earlier, before we decided to go, If he takes off, at least I have my loving family there, and I have one of my jobs covered. Thanks again.

May 23, 2007
10:11 pm
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bonni
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I have a very similar relationship with my best friend. On some levels, I want more, but I know it can never be more. I love him dearly, but not in a way that could work in a real marital relationship. We are more like brother and sister than anything else, intimate but not significantly sexual.

I am unavailable and I think it helps him feel safe with me. He doesn't want to push the boundaries for his own reasons and that makes me feel safe with him. It works for both of us. Its a minor strain on my marriage, but its only a contributing factor, given some other major issues. I mostly accept it for what it is.

The rules thing hit a nerve. He has several, BUT it gives me a certain level of comfort AND he doesn't expect me to follow them. If he were my partner, he would. Instead, he's just my very dear friend who I love enough to make him feel safe by remembering his issues and being respectful of his home.

I've actually been thinking all day about getting an additional life insurance policy in his name so that he's taken care of if something happens to me. I know that seems weird, but with all my heart I want to protect and take care of him. Not more than my feelings toward my kids, but similar. I don't expect much from him, but he does take care of me in his way. When my husband was overseas, he kept me sane and alive. He helped with the kids and loved me in his way. For that I will always be grateful. One day, he will find a wife that he will find suitable and I will force myself to be distant and peripheral and it will be hard. In the meantime, I have to focus on making the other parts of my life more meaningful so I am less reliant on him for support. (can't rely on dh because the military owns him and leaves nothing left for me, why set myself up to be disappointed over and over and over again?).

bonni

May 23, 2007
10:55 pm
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Nina009
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That is differnt. I live in the same house with my ex, because of $, and It is very hard to find a roomate that tolarates a young man ,like my son, I HAVE ABSOULTLUY NOTHING WITH MY EX/HUSBAN. And most people don`t even know we live under the same roof.

May 24, 2007
9:05 pm
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bonni
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are you living with your friend who doesn't want to have sex with you or your ex? I don't understand.

if i weren't married, i could easily see me moving in with my friend and having a platonic relationship and being frustrated with it not being more.

i'd go out of the relationship for what he wasn't giving me.

bonni

May 24, 2007
11:37 pm
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Nina009
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I live with the x/h. My friend and I have lived on and off for many years. the x/h came in the picture, because one of those times the x moved in to be with my son, when I was living in another state. My friend and I
used to be intimate for 7 years, but now it is 0.
He is very good to me and what I like is that he spends lots of time with me. We have travel this country and gone to beautiful places, and we have lost of fun, we like the same music, like to hike, walk on the beach, basically everything but sex!.
He is difficult, but not all the time.
I get it now, with all the good advise, I know what to do now,
It is totally up to me. I have to accept him for what he has to offer, and if we are living together, he HAS TO take medication. That is my last decision. Thank you all for your time, I have a more clear mind now.

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