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hate my job
June 4, 2007
8:47 pm
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mousey
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I'm sure many people will tell me that. But, my problem is that I love my job but hate where I work. I've been looking for a job for six months now. Been on two interviews. Same response-we can't afford you. So I stay where I am because of the money and the benefits. The main problem is my supervisor. We used to get along great but things have changed. New person in the place wants my job-even though she could never do it-so she repeats everything I've said but twists it to sound worse. Every day I go there gets worse for me. I know I need to get out before I loose my sanity. I keep to myself because I don't trust anyone. Most of my co-workers are women. I'm a woman. But after all the years of working I so prefer to work with men. Men don't feel that they have to prove something to the world like women do. And we feel that way because men get treated better in jobs than women do. Anyway, any advise other than get out, which I am trying desperately to do or discuss it with him. I can't do that because we are well past that point. I can't even look at him anymore. He takes the word of someone whose know to be an exagerator whose been there two years over someone whose been with him for nine years. I almost wish he would fire me so I could collect unemployment and then would be forced to take a job for less money.

June 5, 2007
3:36 pm
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chelonia mydas
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Mousey,

I am so sorry to hear of your troubles. What do you like about your job? could you find a similar job that encorporates the things you like about this job into a different field that might be able to support your current salary? Do you mind sharing what your career is in?

As for dealing with it until you can get out... When I have been in a similar situation I would write down the reasons I like my job, or things that I was involved in that made a postitive difference, or pictures that reminded me of the things that I liked about my job and put them in various locations throughout my workspace. Not really conspicuous areas, but so I would come across them throughout the day. For example every 15-30 pages or so of my post it pads, I would come across a note to myself about what I liked about my job. Or I put photos in my desk, in CD cases etc. that I would happen across as I did my assigned tasks. I was surprised at how much it helped.

I made sure it was all stuff that my co-workers could see too. Sometimes they would happen across some of it. If they did, I'm sure they thought I was strange, but that is a common thought for many people who know me. 🙂

Hang in there, change is a constant in our lives and this too shall pass.

Hugs,
Chelonia

June 5, 2007
5:52 pm
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gracenotes
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mousey,

Would you say that this person is bullying you? How bad are the distortions? Is she defaming you? Whatever is going on, you are a target and victim for this person, and it can really escalate. More than likely she has skewed who you are to her higher ups.

This is really a complex subject. When I was dealing with a narcissistic jerk at my old job, I found a book called The Bully at Work by Gary & Ruth Namie. That might be of help in this situation. This book was written for severe situations where people are contemplating legal suits, worker's comp, etc. but there might be something of value for you here.

Just never let this people allow you to buy into any feelings of incompetence you might have because it sounds like that might be her mission, and take care of yourself, and document, document, document if something feels like bullyng or defamation. Bullying behavior has really ruined people's lives, and co-workers, for whatever reason, seem to keep their mouth shut and side with the bully, so please weigh the worth of fighting this battle or getting out of there as soon as reasonably possible.

June 5, 2007
9:48 pm
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mousey
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Hi all,
I guess maybe in a way you could say she is bullying me. She's not very good at what she does and she's a cronic complainer. So, I need to keep a strict eye on her when she does some of the work that I supervise. The good news, although I hate to say it this way, is that she's payroll/human resources. Our production plant foreman and asst foreman are truly disguisted with her. Most of the employees don't even want to deal with her. She's rude, nasty and mean to them most times. She's very moody and she has a really depressing life. I have always felt sorry for her so I went out of my way to be very civil to her even when I didn't want to. The plant foreman told me today that he is going to e-mail the president and vice president about her behavior and how the employees don't want to deal with her. And perhaps that might make things better for a short while but the bottom line for me is that I really need to leave this company because I have no respect for my supervisor. I am the assistant controller and he is the CFO. He and I have had our ups and downs for several years but it was always tolerable but now it's reached the point of being intolerable. I sent our two resumes last night. Hopefully, I will get a call from at least one. And I've already made up my mind to take a pay cut as long as the company appears to be decent.

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