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Grudges!
September 4, 2000
10:57 am
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Jaskid
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My husband says that I hold grudges all of the time. I was very hurt and upset at him for something, and though he can turn his switches off and on, I can't. He expects me to be all lovey dovey when I am still hurting. He was trying to hug me...saying that he wanted me and I did not even want him too...and the thought of being with him sexually made me angry. He told me that he would never push me away, even if I did something to him that hurt him because, "he loves me with and unconditional love!" That made me feel really bad. Maybe I do not love with with an unconditional love? When something happens between us, why do I let it effect our whole world? It's like until the thing is resovled I can not be loving towards him, that is wrong. I realize when I feel really good about myself nothing really bothers me that much, but when I am down and feeling weak, I become this little selfish child who has to have things her way and if they do not go her way I throw a fit.
I know the real truth deep down inside, that all these little things don't really matter, and that my husband does truly love me, and though I want him to act a certain way, he's who he is, only human. I want so bad to be able to separate the reality of the NOW, from the reality of what is. Does anyone understand where I am coming from?

Jaskid

September 4, 2000
5:24 pm
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Molly
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Very much so, infact are you me? Don't forget to use the hormone excuse, at least you have one. Men are different from women, and that is that. We are deep, all our names should be well, beats butt... Common, laugh a little, you have the rest of your life to be sad, you are gonna have a baby!!!!! I wish so often I could your life for the next 18 years has a plan, gosh and golly, plant some posies, find some thing to put on the grill, make lists for every one to do while your in the hospital, and after, cut cupons for diapers, and give the grudges a break, don't forget that baby can catch the mood, we are chemical, and baby gets the sad one s as well as the good ones, find some safe paint, and become a picasso, knit, sew, and leave the old man with the other kids for a while, go to an aromatherapy store, and get some essential oils that make you smile. 🙂

September 4, 2000
6:29 pm
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Jaskid
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Thanks Molly!

September 11, 2000
6:22 pm
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Cutie14
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September 24, 2010
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Hello Jaskid!
This is Cutie14. I just wanted to say that I know what you mean. Of course I am not married, but for some odd reason when ever something doesn't go the way I planned, i get upset! I think that part of it may be because I am an only child and all of my life, until recently I have gotten practically anything i wanted and got to do anything I wanted with who i wanted to. So in other words, I was/am a spoiled little brat!!! But these days, obiously I can't do, get or have everything I want because I am a young adult now! I don't mean to get upset when something doesn't go my way, but i have noticed that I get mad/depressed when I don't get my way. I really wish that there was a way to make that go away, but to tell you the truth I don't think that there is. Well that probably didn't help, but at least you know that you aren't like the only one that is kinda like that. Good Luck:)
Cutie14

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