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gotta get this off my chest, can you help?
April 6, 2001
9:38 am
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eligarcia
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hello,
my name is eli, i'm a guy, and it seems like everthing in my world is going to pieces, and i dont know what to do. I have had problems for a while now. In feb 2000 i got picked by the rotary club in my town to go to switzerland for a year as an exchange student. everything was going ok until my mom and i started having problems again. i got tired and quit high school (junior year) and joined the army national guard. never went to switz. when i came back from basic training and A.I.T., i returned to my moms place, and she was still arguing as usual. i was there from august 2nd till halloween when she put me in jail cause i borrowed the car she gave me, but technically was not under my name, to go see my grandmother across town. i was in jail for 21 hours until my grandmotherpicked me up. i lived with her for a month and then moved in at a friends house. then i started working for the new prison that opened up here in town.
my girlfriend, who i love so dearly, had recently moved to Mississippi to go to college since august 19 2000 and i was feeling lonely, but she came back down for the xmas hollidays. everything was peachy when she was here, but then my roomates sister came down to visit tom, my roomate. me and my girlfriend were having a blast until she left back to MS. while she was here, toms sister took advantage of me one night, when i was totally drunk. i can remember some stuff and it was horrible. i never told my girlfriend (jennifer) this, although i should have. later on she broke up with me on march 1st, at 7pm. she didnt tell my why, she just did. i didnt question her about it. on the 10th she came down to TX, where i live, for spring break. toms sister told me that jennifer did not want to be with me everagain, and that she did not want to talk to me. toms sister then tells jennifer that I wsa very angry with jennifer and did not want to talk to her. all lies. all i wanted to do was to be with jennifer, hold her, kiss her. jennifer felt exactly the same way. the last day jennifer and i talked about what was going on and we were so glad to be talking to each other and we kissed, and held each other, for the last hour of her spring break until she had to depart back to MS. later on the phone she told me that she broke up with me because toms sister told her that kristine (toms sister) and myself were always messing around behind jennifers back whenever kristine came to see tom. so i told jennifer that that was a lie and stuff like that has never happened but she did take advantage of me. kristine denies it all and says that i was drunk and didnt remember anything so i shouldnt be talking. kristine ruined my life. my love. my mind. my body. and then tom was constantly flirting with jennifer during spring break while i was at work at night at the prison. jennifer told me that he tried to kiss her. i have told tom not to flirt with her since jennifer and i started dating. he has no respect for anyone.
my mom told me in march she has cancer. she has it in the large intestine, and colen. my grandmother is 75 and withering away like an old oak tree. i hate kristine because she hurt me in more ways than one. i dislike my roommate becuase he is still being flirtatios with jennifer. jennifer my first real love, and still is in MS and she isnt my girlfriend anymore. i am in serious financial trouble. i started the process of joining the active duty army so i can be stationed in MS to be closer to jennifer, but she told me that is wasnt a very good idea for me to be there. i leave to the active army sometime this or next month. i hardly eat anymore, and drink alcohol more than i should. i am always thinking of jennifer and now, more than ever, i feel lonely, scared, and deppressed.
what should i do? i dont know anymore.
thank you for taking the time to read my letter. if you would please respond, it would really help.

April 7, 2001
2:39 am
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catman
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It seems that you may lack control in your life. Joining the army will do you some good, but only if you take it serious and use its resources. I had the same lack of control in my life at 19 yrs old and joined the army. It turned my life around. Remember, the company that you keep will have a huge effect on the person that you will grow to be. Be careful in the army. It is easy to fall into the crowd of drinkers. I know because I have been there and done that and I am not any better for it. You should out in to be staitoned somewhere far away from your ex and these friends of yours. The army is an incredible place to find yourself and get life experience, but only if you use it well.

April 7, 2001
1:55 pm
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janes
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September 24, 2010
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I agree with the get away from those friends part....sounds like you shouldn't really classify them as friends.

You make your own life. You have great things ahead of you as you are open and honest and seem to be aware of what you need to do.

Life can be sad but also happy. It's a series of steps of growing...and not just growing up..growing as a person to be completely YOU.

Don't depend on others for happiness..it comes from within.

Lose the alcohal for awhile...concentrate on moderation. LIfe can be lonely but it can be great.

Good luck in the army...get all the training you can so when you get out you have a path to follow til you find your niche to fill

April 7, 2001
5:34 pm
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LETITIA
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ALOT OF PEOPLE GET HURT IN LONG DISTANCE RELATIONSHIPS. YOU MADE A GOOD CHOICE TO JOIN THE ARMY, BUT YOU HAVE TO DO IT FOR YOU, NOT ANYBODY ELSE! TRY TO THINK OF ONLY GOOD THINGS AND REMEMBER, GOD HAS ALL THE ANSWERS. IF YOU GET A CHANCE READ SONG OF SONGS IN THE HOLY BIBLE.(THE N I V VERSION IS EASY TO UNDERSTAND) THIS IS A BEAUTIFUL LOVE STORY AND IT MAY GIVE YOU SOME COMFORT. JUST REMEMBER ONE THING, YOU DIDN'T MAKE HISTORY! THESE PROBLEMS SURROUND US EVERYDAY, SO KEEP YOUR HEAD UP AND TELL YOURSELF YOU ARE STRONG AND YOU CAN MAKE IT THROUGH WHATEVER COMES YOUR WAY. GOD BLESS YOU!

April 8, 2001
3:00 am
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deturner
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i have been with this guy for 2 years and things where going goood until last year we would argue about alot of stupid things and at the time of the arguement it wasnt stupid to me.we have been living together for about 6months now and its been up and down cause he like to argue and he hates to admit when he is in the wrong so he puts it on me alot so i take it and that will be the ned of it for now.now he tells me im psyco and i need help but i dont think i do alot of my friends tell me to leave him he is to controling, but i will say he has done alot for me more than my family my mom cant seem to call once in awhile so we only see her once a year an thats x-mas time. i have four wonderful children that i love more than myself.i have my one friend that tells me i need to leave my boyfriend cause he is an arab and he is ruining your life but i dont feel that way except we do have alot of problems and he always say it is me i need some one else opinion do you think i am making a mistake for staying with this guy i do love him with all my heart but sometimes i feel angry toward him cause of the way he talks to me i am very confuse at this moment and dont know who else to talk to any answers would be very helpful thank you deturner

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