Avatar

Please consider registering
guest

sp_LogInOut Log In sp_Registration Register

Register | Lost password?
Advanced Search

— Forum Scope —




— Match —





— Forum Options —





Minimum search word length is 3 characters - maximum search word length is 84 characters

sp_TopicIcon
God Bless You All, but where do I start?
October 15, 1999
11:01 am
Avatar
Sierra
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 27, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

I thank all of you for responding to my posts and pouring your hearts out, giving advice, which by the way, makes a lot of sense and touches me deeply. I think my problem here most of all is fear. Fear of the unknown as my mother would often say when the subject of death was brought up. Right now I am faced with decisions. Decisions about the apartment and which apartment or will I qualify for ANY apartment. Today I will call to see if there is any word back on the one I applied for on Monday. My sister and her daughter, along with my dad all live in the same complex. I have applied for the unit directly above my father's place, so that will be convenient, but maybe TOO convenient. What I mean is this.....Alcoholism runs in my family. Dad and sis have a drinking problem and my niece is well on her way down the same path. Should I consider moving this close or should I take another route? I'm afraid that I'll be jumping from the frying pan into the kettle. Dad wants me near in the event that things change with my husband. He has never been known to be physically abusive, but drugs change people and my father feels that I'd be safer living close to family. On the other hand....wouldn't I be putting myself in the center of yet another worrisome (sp?) situation? I have pretty much distanced myself from the alcoholism thingy (if that's possible, ya know?)...dad falling down when he's had too much too drink, sis on her rages over trivial matters and my niece and her vicious tantrums. I'm afraid that they will become too dependant on me and I'm not in a position to take on any more than what I'm dealing with now. Am I being selfish by thinking this? What should I do? The first step seems to be the hardest.....

Also, some people have advised that I move quickly. Take only the bare minimum and hit the road. I feel overwhelmed..confused, etc. There are a lot of mom's belongings here in this house, along with family heirlooms and other things. I'm about to panic at the thought of having to move so much, but yet I don't trust leaving it behind either. Should I even be thinking about material possessions at a time like this? Oh God...what's wrong with me? I'm just at a loss here...

October 15, 1999
2:24 pm
Avatar
Brittainy
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Hi Sierra I can see that you are in a very difficult situation. On the one hand it seems that you feel obligated to live by your Father, yet something else is telling you to move far away. Maybe you can find a middle road. Is there a chance that you could live near, but not in the same block of apartments as your Father? Have you thought of talking to your Father about this alchol problem? If you have, then maybe you can discuss about some form of help and support that can be offered to both yourself and your Father
don't suffer alone there are people who can help. Let me know how you are getting on. God bless

October 15, 1999
4:04 pm
Avatar
Sierra
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 27, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Thanks Brittainy:) I think that you have a point there...a middle road. Last night I took the first step and attended a support group meeting and met some wonderful people there, one of whom I called today. She took her time and listened to every word, much like you and so many others have on the boards here. She suggested a middle road as well and told me to try not to feel so overwhelmed by all of this. It's hard to do sometimes, but I am trying. I have decided that if that particular apartment complex accepts my application that I will decline. There are many other complexes nearby and I plan to start checking them out on Monday. Lots of places here are not open on Saturday for some reason. This way I can be close, but not TOO close and still have my privacy and quiet. Still not sure whether or not to take a furnished or unfurnished because I'm not sure that I can afford movers, etc. Actually what I'm trying to say is that I'm not sure about anything! Sometimes I wonder if I'm looking for a way out of all of this by postponing what is probably the inevitable. I do know however that I cannot handle living the way I've been living the past several months, so a change is definitely in store for me and probably soon. Wish me luck and I'll keep you posted:)

Forum Timezone: UTC -8

Most Users Ever Online: 247

Currently Online:
54 Guest(s)

Currently Browsing this Page:
1 Guest(s)

Top Posters:

onedaythiswillpass: 1134

zarathustra: 562

StronginHim77: 453

free: 433

2013ways: 431

curious64: 408

Member Stats:

Guest Posters: 49

Members: 109444

Moderators: 5

Admins: 3

Forum Stats:

Groups: 8

Forums: 74

Topics: 38532

Posts: 714179

Newest Members:

ValeryasaDazy, bujhtrDazy, ArtyomyushkaDazy, wrestlingDazy, cnfhtvbkbfyDazy, inulaDazy

Moderators: arochaIB: 1, devadmin: 9, Tincho: 0, Donn Gruta: 0, Germain Palacios: 0

Administrators: admin: 21, ShiningLight: 572, emily430: 29

Copyright © 2019 MH Sub I, LLC. All rights reserved. Terms of Use | Privacy Policy | Cookie Policy | Health Disclaimer