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Getting married
March 14, 2001
1:25 am
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Sammy
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A friend from overseas has been living in Australia and she has been having problems in her home country. She see the great freedom Australians share and wants to stay here. The only problem is that they won't give her permanent residency. Originally, she was going to the US but the scholarship has fallen through. She has asked me to marry her and I don't really see a problem there. My parents would probably kill me and although I don't love her, it would be interesting and a bit of an adventure. Her student visa exspires in 2 months and she has given me a week to decide so that she can ask someone else. I've suggested that she move in first and see how that works. She seems open to the idea. Do only fools rush in?

March 14, 2001
2:43 am
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gingerleigh
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My first reaction to this was... you've *got* to be kidding.

But, then again, a lot of cultures go in for the arranged marriage thing, and it works fine too.

It depends on your view of marriage. If you value marriage as a sacred institution, something you do for life, where you are committed to one and only one person, then this seems like a pretty hasty decision. Besides, would you want to tell your kids that you and their mom got married because you felt sorry for her and her situation in her home country?

But, if you don't view marriage that way, and see divorce or an open relationship as an acceptable alternative to the marriage described above, then why not?

I personally couldn't bring myself to do it. Why would you marry someone you didn't love?

What does your gut tell you?

March 14, 2001
7:24 am
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janes
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Is this a marriage of convenience only?

Personally I only see trouble esp. if you expect sex and then she "falls for" someone else.

And what about the legality....

March 14, 2001
12:57 pm
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Molly
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Just how far will you carry this rescue, will you support her when she cant work, pay her tuition when she can't ? Marriage has all sorts of strings attached to it, and this is your choice. It will be hard to play house, then remember it is a business arrangement. Then you will expect wife duties,and she will maybe still be of a business mind. do you have assets, will you share assetts, is this the type of woman that you would want to marry? Beware, and perhaps talk to an attourney.

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