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general suport
October 30, 1999
8:32 pm
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loveable
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September 29, 2010
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good women falling in love with men that
cannot commit

October 31, 1999
1:45 am
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VRJ
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September 27, 2010
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Yes, isn't it hard?! Do you always pick the wrong men? It still feels weird, but after doing a lot of reading and soul searching it seems like we may also be avoiding commitment by picking people that, if we are honest with ourselves, we know or should have known were inappropriate. Tell us more. There are many people here who know about commitmentphobic/addictive/codependent relationships here.

November 1, 1999
9:03 am
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Cici
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September 24, 2010
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I used to have a problem getting into relationships that were with abusive/emotionally distant/ commitment-phobic men. I realized, after being very hurt by a past relationship to the point that I had a complete emotional breakdown, that it was my low self-esteem that was causing this. I sub-consciously felt like I wasn't worthy of being in a relationship with a supportive, loving man who cared about me and was confident in himself.

I spent time alone, then accidentally found a man who fit my description! He was involved in a "profession" that wasn't necessarily legal, but even changed for me and went to NA meetings with me. You have to consider yourself first and foremost. If you are able to be alone and be happy being alone, that's the first step. When you respect yourself and can look at yourself honestly and ACCEPPTINGLY (key word!) then you will find yourself attracted to men who are worthy of your love and committment.

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