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from hurt2, newly divorced
March 18, 2005
12:30 pm
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hurt2
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Even though I am divorced I still see my husband well my ex as my husband. He is still staying with me but I don't know how long that will last. He's talking about leaving the state of IN for good. We have 3 kids together 6,4,2 how can he talk about leaving his kids for good. Even though I divorced him it doesn't give him the right to walk out on them. He still needs to be a father to them. RIGHT

March 18, 2005
12:38 pm
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mamacinnamon
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Hurt2:

Yes, he is their father. He does have responsibilities to them both physical and financial. BUT, you cannot force him to uphold his responsibilities. He either will be responsible or he won't. It has nothing to do w/ you. And, most of all, no matter what he does, DO NOT bad mouth him to the kids. It will only make them not like you. He can dig his own grave and he will suffer the consequences for his actions. The kids will form their own opinions.

I'm sorry he may do that. Yes the kids will suffer, but they will somewhat adjust. He's the one that will suffer in the long run.

All you can do is reassure the kids that you are sure their dad must love them and no, you don't know why he's not here or no, you don't know why he moved. Let him do his own explaining UNLESS he blames it on you. Then you let the kids know you had nothing to do w/ his decisions.

I'm sorry he's a jerk.

March 18, 2005
12:40 pm
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Big heart
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Its just talk right now. It sounds like he's trying to make you feel bad for divorcing him and it's working. Be strong don't let the manipulation get to you. Also another thing to consider here... if he is really going to relocate himself away from his children for no good reason than what does that say about him. I honestly think he's trying to mess with your mind right now. If he is soo unhappy then why doesn't he leave right now? Don't fall for it.

March 18, 2005
3:18 pm
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CAMER
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so true, he is the father and he should be there for his kids...if not, that is such neglect on his part, and the kids will pay the price in the long run. Your ex should have more compassion and step up to the plate and do what is right for the children and not be so selfish thinking about himself.

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