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"Forgiveness"...is for the birds.........
November 13, 2006
9:02 pm
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truthBtold
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I will never, EVER forgive my father for fucking me over - and for my mother who just stood by and watched....and protected his sorry ass because she did not have the where with all to do the hard thing...that being...protecting her daughters!!!!

There now. I have said my peace!!!!

November 13, 2006
9:04 pm
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Randomwomen2
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It sounds like you are in a lot of pain sweetheart. I have a few minutes do you need to talk? (((((TruthBtold))))))

November 13, 2006
9:10 pm
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lovetocrochet
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I totally understand where you're at. Dealing with similar issues with my bio-fam - they refuse to ackmowledge any wrong-doing. My mother even called my brother's molesting me normal and told me my father refusing to stop emailing me obscene stuff was my problem. They met my confrontation letter earlier this year with total indignance.

I have had to accept that they are not going to change, and they are not going to repent of what they've done. As far as I understand, I'm released of any obligation to forgive. Not even God forgives someone who is unrepentant, and I am not more powerful than God by far.

Even if we COULD forgive it doesn't erase our feelings when we've been hurt and when righteous anger is called for. Our emotions don't get shut on and off like a switch or change based on what we decide to do in respect to forgiveness.

I admire you for being able to vent and get that off your chest. It's still hard for me to really be that honest with my own anger, and I know I have a LOT of rage inside. In a way your honesty puts you in a healthier position, I think.

November 13, 2006
9:15 pm
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truthBtold
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Random,
Thanks.
Yes. I am in alot of pain. What I hate the most about this time of year is the "family" crap that is dumped loaded upon us to be just be ONE BIG happy "Norman Rockwell" kind of family.

I swear to God that I wish there were some sort of "Realistic" Christmas cards which said...something like....

Christmas Greetings - a time of cheer?....Season Greetings, let's all be aware.... of the fucking crappy shit - father did to me...and how, you, DEAR MOM...let him off......so easily!!!!!

Don't believe that I'll find THAT in my local Hallmark store!!!!!

Sorry for the negative vibes...can't help it.

November 13, 2006
9:24 pm
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truthBtold
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LTC,

I posted this last thread before I had a chance to read your post.

"People" are really fucked up - even when those "people" are related to us!!!!

I LOVE your term...Rightous Anger....could not be more right!!!!

Nope. They are NOT going to repent!

Your statement of: "I am released of any obligation to forgive' pretty much sums it all up.

I guess the best we can do is just to "cut our losses" and get on with our own lives...in spite of these "Holiday Seasons" might have otherwise like to brain-wash our minds................

November 13, 2006
9:26 pm
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Randomwomen2
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I truly understand sweetheart. If you read my betrayal thread then you can catch a part of my story. I feel for you hunny. I will write to you more when I get back from my support group (((HUGS)))

November 13, 2006
9:30 pm
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truthBtold
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Well, I am signing off for tonight...gonna crank up my very expensive audiophile stereo.....B&W matrix 802 speakers (made in the UK -no less) with a killer BEL amp and Klyne pre-amp and just crank up the likes of Mahalia Jackson, Ray Charles, Santana, Sade and anyone else whom seems to address my concerns................

November 13, 2006
10:03 pm
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lovetocrochet
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Rock on 🙂

My husband's also made the Normal Rockwell reference. He thinks that whole concept is a load too. What a guy!

November 15, 2006
1:40 pm
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truthBtold
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Wouldn't it be funny for some artist to "update" that Norman Rockwell painting - in a Norman Rockwell-ish style....only show the likes of a really dysfunctional family instead????

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