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Fireflys pain frustration
December 12, 2003
9:01 am
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Anonymous
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out of sheer frustration this morning i jotted down some thots about pain....

If pain were an object
it would be black
with a zillion legs
legs with razor sharp spikes
of red hot and searing blue tips

pain

it grabs and doesnt let go
it stabs and burns
with a big shit-eatin' grin

it doesnt care if you cry
it doesnt care if you hurt
it feeds off your pain
like a narccissistic blob

if i only knew how to get rid
of pain
i try
i send little zoloft,sulindac and trazadone fighters into the pain zone to attack it
but it just goes from one place to another

how do you combat
something that hides
then sneaks up at any given time
in any given place
all its legs cutting into you?

i dont know ... i think i give up

pain wins...

December 12, 2003
9:18 am
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HARRYO
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Well said. My God the depth of it
all sucks. But why do we choose
to dwell there? When we can make
the choice OUR CHOICE to not be
hurting then we have truly done the work necessary for recovery.
Try to thing of the many blessings STILL in your life. You'd be
surprised. You hurt, I hurt we
hurt because we are sore losers. Each
perceived failure is a lesson and
an oppurtunity for spiritual growth.
Learn that lesson and you'll pass
the test.

December 12, 2003
9:21 am
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Anonymous
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awww HARRY O ..you dont know me yet ..

i have done much work on my emotional pain ...doing quite well in that regard.

i am talking about 'physical' pain here

December 12, 2003
9:38 am
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HARRYO
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Firefly sorry for being judgemental
of you. I have remarkable
physical healing powers so it is
hard for me to relate to physical
pain.
Diet, excercise, and healthy
attitudes is certainly a good
approach.
I will pray for you physical
pain to be relieved please pray for my
emotioanl and spiritual pain.

December 12, 2003
9:39 am
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Anonymous
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YOU got it Harry O!

December 12, 2003
9:55 am
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mj
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I find that if I distract myself from my physical pain, it still exists, but the focus of my attention is on things that are more enjoyable. Sometimes the pain does win.....

Hugs dear firefly.

I think you expressing your pain with metaphors is a very creative way to let it go .....

December 12, 2003
10:18 am
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mj
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HarryO....please tell me how you control your physical pain? I don't take any medications for my ankle and some days it is hard to get past the pain level...

When you were electrocuted...was that when you learned about diet and healing thoughts?

December 12, 2003
10:18 am
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arwen
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I like that you were able to express your feelings in such a way that it was difficult to distinguish whether you were talking about physical pain or spiritual pain. The two are so closely connected sometimes, but we often don't realize it.

I know it must feel overwhelming to have severe, constant physical pain. I don't have the ability to fully understand it, having never gone through anything remotely similar to what you experience.

I hope that by surrendering yourself to the physical pain, it will allow you extra spiritual freedom. I hope the pain you feel is no longer able to impact your spirit.

You are Firefly. Like a little ray of hope at the top of a light house. Others with the same problem will benefit from hearing your expression of emotion regarding your battle. You will win the war.

Love,

Arwen

December 12, 2003
10:22 am
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mj
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I use to wake up in the morning with instant pain surging through my ankle and my soul....living and breathing was an effort.

Since my last surgery in Sept....I can say the the pain has subsided...to where it is tolerable...it still exists, I still have it...but its tolerable. Hugs dear friends.

December 12, 2003
10:39 am
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HARRYO
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MJ, This has nothing to do with when
I was electricuted. I'm 55 years
old. Yesterday I played 3 games of
basketball during my lunch
with guys in their 20's and 30's.
I surf, I snowboard, I rollerblade.
I think the endorphin buzz has
some kind of magic elixir. It's
strange. I sprained my ankle.
The Doctor told me at least (to heal)
6 weeks. I showed him, a week
later I was back to my active
self.
I'm starting to get in to stretching
and breathing and yoga types of things. It isn't easy for me.
I can barely touch my toes. I
thank God for granting me this
precious gift. I guess that's
why I have such trouble dealing
with hurt and rejection
and inner pain. That's why I
like to talk to you guys.

December 12, 2003
10:43 am
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mj
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YOU Rock!!!!
Glad you are taking good care of YOURSELF. Excuse me for not knowing when you got your injury...but I am glad that you are blessed with healing.

I am glad you like to talk here too.
I thank God for my Blessings daily as well. Hugs and have a great day. I am sure you will 🙂

December 12, 2003
2:30 pm
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unhappy camper
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firefly
I regret your suffering. I wish there was something that could help you. Have you done everything possible?

I'm hurting for you dear....

December 12, 2003
3:24 pm
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silence
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If they re-run this week's south park this weekend, you should watch it. Stan went through the same thing.

December 12, 2003
3:33 pm
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boland
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((((((hugs))))))) firefly, hope your pain gets easyer really soon, sorry your in so much pain, im thinking of you, wishing and hoping that it all goes away for you, look after ya self,

December 12, 2003
4:03 pm
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arwen
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Ahh, Silence...I knew there was more than one reason I'm in love with you. South Park is the shit!

Harry, I am struggling with finding ways to make time to focus on me while still keeping my children and work a priority. Any suggestions?

Firefly, I hope you are feeling better, one day at a time.

Love,

Arwen

December 12, 2003
4:15 pm
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Anonymous
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Thanks for replies everyone

was quite touched by some.

(((hugs)))

December 13, 2003
11:37 am
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HARRYO
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Arwen, with the demands of the job
and the family it can be hard to
focus on yourself. In the spiritual
sense? Pray. In the physical
sense. When they poled over 100
fitness instructors and asked them
what was the best piece of fitness
equipment was, know what they said?
A jumprope. Gets aerobics, gets
cardio, good for agility and
endurance. Best of all the endorphin
buzz, any way you can get them.
Orgasms are good too, better if
shared. OK by yourself. lol

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