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Feeling nervous by the approach of my 2nd encounter with my therapist
July 24, 2007
7:40 pm
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Rasputin
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This Thursday 26th July is my 2nd encounter with my therapist. I feel nervous and tense. She gave me homework assignment of writing 2-3 pages about my own feelings and guess what? I haven't done anything of that yet. Besides, my encounter with her is right after work which is 6 pm when I'm exhausted, hungry, tired, feel like having someone fix me my supper.

Folks, I feel overwhelmed...what can I do? Any help or advice???

July 24, 2007
7:48 pm
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It No Longer Matters
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Take a snack to work and eat it before you go. Have a cup of hot tea or something to sooth you and maybe give you a little pep. Stop and pick up take out on the way home. Write about feeling what you feel right now.
See I am soooo good at solving everyone's problems but my own. Go read Need Advice and tell ME what to do.

Bitsy

July 24, 2007
8:41 pm
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fantas
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Ras...

Remember this is going to be a great experience between you and the therapist. You waited so long to connect with her and now it's finall happeneing. As for your essay, start this evening and right a third of a page about how you are feeling, do the same tomorrow and a little bit the next day right before you meet the therapist. Perhaps you can write about this experience and how anxious you are about it just like you did here. Take a deep breath, and write something, anything really. It's not a paper to be graded by a teacher.

July 24, 2007
8:47 pm
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Imagine2
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Tell your therapist you think deep down inside you're a male and may not have feelings. It aint natural, this will cost you several more sessions but in the long run probably weren't gonna get out easy anyway.

July 24, 2007
9:02 pm
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sad sack
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Hi Rasputin,

I agree with Fantas. You can write about the anxiety you are now experiencing at the mere thought of completing the writing assignment. Why do you think you haven't written a word thus far? You can also write about what you hope to gain from the counseling experience. As Fantas said, this is not a college essay. Just write your feelings as if you are talking to your closest friend. Your therapist is not going to judge you.

Although exploring your feelings could sometimes be frightening, it can also be extremely cathartic.

Good luck. You will do fine.

Sad

July 24, 2007
9:02 pm
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sad sack
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Hi Rasputin,

I agree with Fantas. You can write about the anxiety you are now experiencing at the mere thought of completing the writing assignment. Why do you think you haven't written a word thus far? You can also write about what you hope to gain from the counseling experience. As Fantas said, this is not a college essay. Just write your feelings as if you are talking to your closest friend. Your therapist is not going to judge you.

Although exploring your feelings could sometimes be frightening, it can also be extremely cathartic.

Good luck. You will do fine.

Sad

July 24, 2007
9:26 pm
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Rasputin
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Thanks all for your responses and soothing answers that helped me to chill out. Tomorrow, my body will join me during my lunch break so I won't be able to write any thing about that essay. I think those who suggested that I write about how I'm feeling nervous to meet my therapist have a real good point and sound like a real bright idea. So, may be Thursady during my lunch break is the ideal time when I can write down my small essay. It should not be complicated, just plain and simple paragraph about this whole process.

I will keep you posted about our encouter!

July 24, 2007
9:39 pm
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Anonymous
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Ras, usually the question "why" leads to quite a bit of material. Like... Why are you feeling nervous? Becuase youre going to be judged? Why are you afraid to be judged, etc.

Another thing is to break your life down into different areas: emotional, financial, socially, loving, etc. Sometimes we are afraid of love but we feel quite secure about our pocket book. Other times fear underlines everything...

The worst issues Ive had to deal with over and over with are fear, guilt, shame, resentment among others. THese toxic feelings are only good to entertain when we have the sound help of a therapist.

Dont be afraid to speak up about your feelings toward the therapy. Its easier than confronting the therapist and will usually give you a sense of respect. Like when your therapist is closing his / her eyes, you can say I dont like that or I feell like you dont care... Take advantage of your session!

hugs,

July 24, 2007
10:05 pm
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Rasputin
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I think I'm feeling nervous bc I like to have my rv in the mornings. Mornings are the ideal time for anything, exams, lectures, rv with therapist etc. At 6pm...is really crazy. YOu're unable to think, reason, talk and being a hardworking person, by 5pm I just wanna relax and have a siesta or just sit on my patio bare-footed and enjoy the breeze. That's what I feel like doing NOT go and see a therapist and talk about deep emotional hurting stuff. But anyway, I am gonna put up with this since it's once every month. Not a big deal.

Thanks (((Sini))) for your reply. I'm always delighted to see your name in my post!!!

July 24, 2007
11:29 pm
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Rasputin-

It's true, evening therapy appointments are hard because by then you have so much daily static in your head. My therapist always wants me to write stuff down, but I've developed some sort of resistance towards that. Something to do with seeing my ugliest thoughts on paper. But I'm sure it would help us focus our session. I'm thinking of emailing it to myself, and/or putting it on my palm pilot- a weekly agenda of angst or even good things as they occur. It's hard to start from scratch everytime you go in- and then confront the things that make you most uncomfortable when you are the most exhausted! I know this sounds like I'm trivializing- but I'm not, I've just been going through it too- you do get used to it. There's that first five minutes that starts off slow... but you'll get rolling when you get in the habit.

My therapist also gives me "homework." I never do it. I just feel so tired and overwhelmed with responsibilities during the week- I just don't want one more "to do" on my list. Right now I resent having to use up one of my evenings to go there to begin with. I just want to go home and relax- like you said. But the resentment part is new. Don't ask we where that's coming from, I"ve been in therapy for 23 years. Sounds like a lot, and it is, but it's helped so much so often.

Please be persistent. If this is not the therapist for you, you will be certain after a while. Just give it a little more time.

be well,
ella

July 25, 2007
7:23 pm
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fantas
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Ras....Just wondering how your appointment went.

July 25, 2007
9:01 pm
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Thanks Ella for validating me and for your encouraging uplifting words. I will take advantage of tomorrow's lunch break and write down my feelings and every thing that comes into my mind. By the time I leave the office, I would hopefully recharge my batteries, at least I have one full hour to do something, take a tour on the shops around, buy some veggies and foodstuff. So, that should keep me revitalized and refreshed rather than sleepy or lazy.

Fan~ I've mentioned in my 1st post that it's tom. So, I will keep you all posted tom. Thanks hon for your concern. (((Fan)))!!!

July 26, 2007
8:40 pm
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Rasputin
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I'm just back from my rv with my therapist which went well. We talked about my problems at work. I told her about the weird manageress who addressed me last week unpleasantly bc I arrived 3 mins late to the office. In fact I was 8h30 sharp in the office. But b/c I pass by the kitchen which is in the 1st floor to get some milk for my coffee and then I go upstairs to the 3rd floor where I work, it was like 3mins past and thus my arrival at 8h33.

She told me that since this manageress is not my supervisor, I should notify my supervisor of what had happened even if I told my coach about it; otherwise this manageress would take advantage of her position and starts to bother me.

Tho I was exhausted and felt like cancelling my appointment with my therapist, something told me to hang on and just bear it a lil bit and I'm very thrilled I listened to that voice.

My therapist adviced me to write down my thoughts during my lunch break and she made a rv with me on next Thurs right after work which is 5h30.

July 26, 2007
8:45 pm
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fantas
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Hi Ras,

I am so glad you hang in there and went to your session. Sounds like things went really well. Is this the therapist you were going to talk to about flashbacks? I remember you saying something like that a while back. How did that go?

July 26, 2007
8:54 pm
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Rasputin
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yes she is Fan. Now we turned the sujbect to my work and that director which I will start another post about it.

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