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11:18 pm
September 24, 2010
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i dont know what is wroung with me.This happens all the time,I get this strong urge to leave.I dont feel like I have that many problems but I always feel overwelmed.I scream in my car all the time.I dont work,but I feel like if I was working I would call in sick.I just started college and I dont feel as educated as the rest of the people in my class because Im 20 and just starting and they are my age and graduating.I hate my living cituation I dont know how to fix it.Im stuck.I feel like I want a boyfriend but I seem to always mess those things up in a big way.The guy Im talking to now is in jail in a diffrent state and he only knows me from the lies I tell him.most people that know me would say that Im a good person a hard worker honest caring loving,but I feel like Im a huge liar I drink alot more that most of the people I know.both of my parents are well....mom is an alcholic like a real one that asks people on the street for money and dad is in jail AGAIN (heroin,spousal abuse ect..)I feel so lost I just want someone to say its ok who you are I will love you come let me take care of you because you deserve it!But maybe I want to vmuch I need help Im so deppressed I hate this place.
12:32 am
September 24, 2010
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Still_lost,
I am sorry to hear you are going through this, you are not alone. Many of us have been (and some still are) in a similar mental place to where you are.
Have you been to counseling? If you find a good counselor they can really help you out. If you don't find a good one the first time (or even the first few times) keep looking.
I am emotionally drained tonight so don't have much to offer in the way of advice at this time- but I wanted to at least respond with lots of hugs, support and letting you know that someone cares and can relate to how you are feeling.
(My parents have substance abuse issues too. I too had similar feelings to what you describe, sometimes still do. I have been working to find better viewpoints of myself and it helps, but I still get into those slumps of feeling overwhelmed.)
Keep working at it, it does get better eventually. I am now in my 30s and still working on it, but I can honestly say that I have learned ways to not feel so overwhelmed, have improved the way I view myself and interact with others.
We are here to support you on your journey to healthier and happier life, but it will take effort and time to get there.
Sending hugs and postive energy your way,
Chelonia
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