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Feeling like a worthless person because of my parents
September 28, 2012
4:07 pm
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zoezilla
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September 28, 2012
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I feel like I am not good enough for my parents and therefore not good enough for anybody else. They always imply that I am fat and ugly and have done so for about 3 years. My BMI is normal, as is my waist to hip ratio and I am a US size 6/8/Medium. I exercise regularly and my diet isn't 100% amazing but it certainly wouldn't horrify a nutritionist. It seems to me that I am not fat, but then my parents say things and I think "there must be a problem as its so bad my family is saying it".

But then other times they act like I am not fat and ugly and say nice things. They never tell me I am pretty or anything, but they tell me to eat more, etc. It really confuses me, they say "you're fat" then "eat more". It makes me feel like a worthless person and I am a blemish on their lives.

I am in the top class at school, have a large group of friends and am usually happy. But now, it is just getting to me so much. I feel like no matter what I weigh, the grades I get or things I accomplish, I will never be enough for them.

 

I don't feel comfortable talking to them about this, as in my family we don't talk about feelings. I would probably cry too and that would just be so embarrassing. I have tried to bring it up before and got shot down or they said I was talking rubbish. I just don't know what to do anymore. I hate being unhappy and crying all the time. I have these crying jags where I just lie on the floor and cry silently for hours. I have lots of nice clothes but don't want to wear them as I just feel like an elephant no matter what I wear.

I have talked to my friends about this before, but now if I try to, they will tell me I'm too depressing, or I don't want to offload onto them as they have just had a serious operation or a family member died. I have times where I get over it, but then I revert back.

Does anyone have any advice? Confused

September 29, 2012
2:09 pm
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onedaythiswillpass
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Listen, you do not need to worry what others think.  Unless the Doctor has told you that there are serious health issues concerning your size, what anyone else says to you need not change how you feel about yourself.

You say you have friends, try hard in school, eat pretty well & try to exercise.

 

I think you are being too hard on yourself.  The next time your parents say something postitive or negative about your size ask them kindly to refrain from these comments.  I am sure they can find a multittude of other things they can talk to you about.

 

People come in all sizes and regardless of whether they are big boned, tiny, thin or obese, as long as they are healthy and happy nothing more matters.

It sounds like you might have a disorder about eating and about how you look to the outside world.  I suspect your parents are partially responsible for this as well as the media.

If you do not feel good about wearing nice new clothes because you think you look too large, you might want to approach your kind parents and ask them to spend some of their hard earned $ sending you to a therapist whose role is to specialize in people with eating disorders and or image disorders.

 

People in general should NEVER make comments about people's size.  No one should say hey you look like you lost or gained weight.  A persons size is no one's business but their own.

When it comes to size, people are rude, very very rude.  Again, unless asked, people should keep their comments to themselves.

 

One Day

September 30, 2012
10:52 pm
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ShiningLight
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Maybe your family were just making fun of you saying those things. It might be best to just to let it go and try to decrease a little bit of your sensitivity. Maybe you are taking things too seriously and you ended up depressed and crying yourself alone in the corner. It's a matter of being contented of what and who you are. You say your body weight is normal and you do exercise regularly so I guess there's nothing to worry about. Just be yourself and continue to be as healthy as you are cause it's much more better than being too thin cause there's nothing good to eat. Happiness is always a choice, if you'd like to be one then act one and be one so you can appreciate more your life. You are actually doing well.

October 1, 2012
4:53 am
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onedaythiswillpass
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It's always good when your own family makes fun of you.  Right?  Particularly your parents?  Right?

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