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Family Problems
October 21, 1999
11:39 am
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Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 24, 2010
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As some of you may or may not know, I moved back home to stay with my parents while I attend NA and kick my drug habit. My father has been very supportive of me and although initially my mother was extremely bitter and rude, she has subsided to a sort of silent contempt that I suppose is at least bearable, probably because my father is very ill and last week suffered from some small strokes. My sister and brother-in-law live with my parents as well while they're building a new house.

My problem is this: my brother-in-law. He is very judgemental and cruel. In the past, when I was in high school, he was not above intimidating me to the point where I would break down and cry, screaming in my face and pushing me around, but never hitting me. My older sister, who is his wife, is very passive and depressed. She's pregnant now, but sleeps most of the day (she lost her graduate assistanceship after she became pregnant because she stopped going to work). He makes rude remarks about my sex life and my drug problems, but never to my face. He speaks loudly to people in the room with me.

My sister has recently joined in and now has decided not to speak to me, although she was very supportive before.

I don't know what to do. I love my sister, but she seems to have chosen her husband over me and I am honestly afraid of him. I hate being around him, but to cut off all contact with him would mean no more contact with my sister. But I have grown to hate him over the past few years...he's not my abusive husband, he's not physically abusive to anyone, but I am still afraid. Please help. I thought my drug problems were the worst of it, but I feel like I am in a worse place now than I was before. At least my drug friends didn't berate me and make me feel so small.

October 21, 1999
11:50 am
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Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 24, 2010
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poor cici, that is NOT the enviornment you need to heal and withdraw at all. I still recommend inpatient, it really is the best for you, dont you think?
Your environment is perfect for wanting to escape through the self medicating you were doing. I am very sorry to hear such crap takes place within your own home.
The only other alternative is inpatient isnt it?
Verbal abuse is just as bad if not worse than physical and the non support and anger from your mother is hurtful and damaging as well as that from your sister. Stay strong and lookwithin for the answers. YOu DO have all the answers within your heart CICI< God bless

October 22, 1999
2:17 pm
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Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 29, 2010
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Tears you are so right. This is not a supportive healthy enviroment to help you kick the habit. I don't know how you've held up this long, but I know I'd have "fallen off the wagon" long ago, having to deal with that and on top of that the stress you must feel from just trying to kick the habit.
All I can say is get out while you can and find a healthy environment to get yourself healthy again. If the time ever comes to where you can find a safe healthy place, just be honest and open and tell your family why you must live somewhere else. Maybe it will help your sister to open her eyes as to what she is getting into with her husband.

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