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Facing our Fears!
January 9, 2006
7:04 pm
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Rasputin
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Today, I made a pact with myself! Through the help of my HP and my friends both on the cyber world and in my personal life; I will not be intimated, feel awkward or paralyzed by my fears. I have decided that nothing will stop me whatsoever from advancing in my life, fulfilling my dreams and visions....

I know that our fears can be debilitating and crippling. Therefore, we need to make the determination that nothing will stop us from going ahead, letting go, giving up that thing that is stopping us from becoming a better human being, wiser, blossoming, more joyful, more mature and more free.

Whatever you're holding on to today or allowing to enslave you for fear of the unknown, I highly recommend you to jump into the that mysterious scary zone. Be adventerous, take a risk, spice up your life, if you like! Yes, take that step of leap into the uncomfort zone that is your destiny and put your life at stake!

I warrant you will not lose! You will become stronger, insightful, empowered, resourceful....

Write them (your fears) down in your journal, and come on here and state your resolution of declaring a war against them. Remember, you don't have to mention here what your fears specificly are if you don't want to, just state your plegde of refusing to cave in to your fears.

Confession is very healing to the soul! So, let not anything stop you or impede you from doing so!

Remember that you are on a healing journey and the best way to start or continue in this journey steadfastly is to stay connected with your feelings and emotions, is to listen to your heart and follow it!

So whatever is hindering you today from becoming a blooming human being will be assasinated for the sake of a better tomorrow and a better YOU!!!

Hence, state you vow, declare it here and a new white page will open up in your life where you will be the author of the book of your own life. However, this time the author will speak another language, the language of Love!!!

I close by stating two of my favorite quotes:

* A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step. ~Lao-tzu~

* Every journey begins with but a small step. And every day is a chance for a new, small step in the right direction. Just follow your Heart song. ~Mattie J.T. Stepanek ~

Thank you for letting me confess my fears. I feel so comforted!!!

~Ras~

January 9, 2006
7:14 pm
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Regret
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Thank you Ras. This is so timely. In about a month or two, I will be defending my PhD thesis. With all I have been blessed with and accomplished,I am afraid of stepping out of my comfort zone. I have been wondering "what if i fail". I really needed to read this and I am very grateful.

Thanks, Thanks and more thanks!

January 9, 2006
7:25 pm
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nc_mom_of_2
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Wow Rasputin!

That was truly insightful and an inspiration to me!

Thank you for being brave enough to admit your fears and willingness to have a face-off with them here.

I, too, will make a pact to face my fears and not crawl back into that comfort zone when things get tough.

My fear is failing and every time I bring home a 4.0 GPA from college, it enpowers me to press forward. At every turn my verbally and mentally abusive soon-to-be ex-hubby tries to discourage and intimidate me, telling me I'm a loser.....

But I am NOT!!! I WILL finish this task of being a Psychologist and become something I could never be with him....
the REAL ME!!!!

Thank you so much for giving me another chance to reaffirm my dreams and remind me to not let fear take that from me!

(((HUGS!!!)))

January 9, 2006
7:31 pm
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Anonymous
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Thanks from Katarina too! I'm going to get out of my comfort zone and live my life. Get out there Girl!

January 9, 2006
9:34 pm
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camra
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Oh heres a big one for me, Im very afraid of driveing alone at night on the highway or interstate.

So I simply don't do it but it can be a real problem sometimes..

camra

January 9, 2006
9:51 pm
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Lass
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**Leap into the uncomfort zone that is your destiny and put your life at stake!**

I loved this line. And the spirit and heart of the whole quest for freedom you have Ras. Proud and happy for you, girl. Totally.

I shall have to think a moment to find my fear list. Get back atcha.

LL

January 9, 2006
10:48 pm
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Anonymous
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Ras,

"Write them (your fears) down in your journal, and come on here and state your resolution of declaring a war against them."

I'm glad to see ONE instance anymore where war is acceptable. Not that I'm a warmonger; I'm a peacemaker at heart, but I feel a strong need to fight an honorable fight against something (not somebody). I can't deny that I have an inner warrior in me. Thanks for posting this thread.

However, what if I declare war on my fears and then find out they have no weapons of mass destruction? I couldn't live with myself, thinking of those poor innocent fears I killed needlessly. :o)

January 9, 2006
10:48 pm
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exoticflower
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You know, all of the things I think I fear, when I reflect on them further are rooted in completley different fears. I used to think that I feared conflict, but in actuallity do not at all, I really fear being invalidated, fear abuse or put-downs. That is not present in all arguments or conflict, and without ever looking at it I had not realized until sometime last year that I hold my own rather well and often diplomaticly in debate--it is abuse that I don't react in a healthy way to. I debate or engage in healthy or growth oriented conflict all the time, but only with emotionally safe people and situations, and I didn;t even know it for soemt time! In my more concious mind, I didn't even know there was a difference between disagreement and conflict.

Right now my biggest fear is what people think of me--not here but in my day to day life. Often not even people I like, I just need aproval from everyone desperately and bend over backwards even when it hurts me to win approval. Wonder how to get rid of that one!!!

Thanks for the thread Ras, definately a lot to think about!!!

January 9, 2006
11:26 pm
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Rasputin
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Thanks all for your vulnerability and openeness. Yes, I am so impressed to find out that we all have fears!

Reg - I wish you the Best of luck and blessings for your PhD. You've been giving us lots of support here!

NC - I lived thru period like that in my life and it was hell on earth. It was really very tough time!

(((Warm Hug))) back to you honey. I'm sure you need it so badly in this time. Good luck in your studies!

Ipw & Camra - Never lose heart and Camra, yes I am afraid of being outside alone when it's dark!

Lass - I can hardly wait to know your fears and compare them with mine.

Seek - The only male who responded to this thread. LOL Oh man, you must be courageous!

Flower - Missed you! I used to be like that Flo, and when I worked on loving myself my self-esteem went high. That's why we need to stay away from abusive people and relationships, they only fester our low self-esteem. I hope you have warm and kind friends. Your roommate, is she kind and warm person? She can perhaps give you some emotional support.

~Ras~

January 11, 2006
10:55 pm
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Anonymous
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Ras,

{Seek - The only male who responded to this thread. LOL Oh man, you must be courageous! }

I often seem to be the only male on threads. I'm either courageous or .... Well, I prefer to think I'm courageous.

Good thread, Ras.

January 11, 2006
11:11 pm
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Rasputin
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Actually, no there has been an influx of males lately. So you are not the only male of these baords.

Seek you are so Sweeeeeeeeet!!!

January 12, 2006
1:03 am
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Philmore Bowles
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I did a seminar about 10 years ago that focused on facing fear.

There were several group processes that were pretty intense. On the last day, everyone took their turn in front of the room (about 200 people, mostly strangers), revealing "3 things I don't want you to know about me".

I almost passed out standing in the line waiting for my turn! It was super intense - and just didn't feel right at all. It was a life changing, very positive moment for me.

I believe fear is THE anchor. Letting go of fear and shame for the first time was an amazing high. There is something very powerful about being shameless and open. Just being OK with me and everyone else exactly as we are. Understanding we were all on this ride together, and not by coincidence.

I learned how we all give our fears their power. I learned that expanding my comfort zone is a truly effective way to defeat fear, anxiety, etc.

I always thought fear was a result instead of a choice. Fear is a choice.

They postulate that there are only 2 states of being - fear and Love. (I really felt this was true and keep it in my mind as often as possible. I want to be Love motivated!)

They said Love is choosing acceptance - of what is AND what is not. They said Love is choosing gratitude and appreciation, instead of being critical and always uncertain.

I feel like Love of others is just so simple. Just choosing to accept people and to recognize myself in them.

Facing fear is a really good way to grow - fast. It's empowering and expands all aspects of life. The more deeply honest and exposing the better, as far as I'm concerned. Deal with what's real, otherwise it's not effective.

Killer thread Ras! 🙂

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