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Every time I hear this song........
March 3, 2006
6:50 pm
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lollipop3
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....It makes me remember when we were friends.

I don't think I have ever heard a song that described two people and their relationship so well, so poignantly, so accurately in so many ways.

Funny how the tables turned in our romantic relationship.

"She Will Be Loved"

Beauty queen of only eighteen
She had some trouble with herself
He was always there to help her
She always belonged to someone else

I drove for miles and miles
And wound up at your door
I've had you so many times but somehow
I want more

I don't mind spending everyday
Out on your corner in the pouring rain
Look for the girl with the broken smile
Ask her if she wants to stay awhile
And she will be loved
She will be loved

Tap on my window knock on my door
I want to make you feel beautiful
I know I tend to get so insecure
It doesn't matter anymore

It's not always rainbows and butterflies
It's compromise that moves us along
My heart is full and my door's always open
You can come anytime you want

I don't mind spending everyday
Out on your corner in the pouring rain
Look for the girl with the broken smile
Ask her if she wants to stay awhile
And she will be loved
And she will be loved
And she will be loved
And she will be loved

I know where you hide
Alone in your car
Know all of the things that make you who you are
I know that goodbye means nothing at all
Comes back and begs me to catch her every time she falls

Tap on my window knock on my door
I want to make you feel beautiful

I don't mind spending everyday
Out on your corner in the pouring rain
Look for the girl with the broken smile
Ask her if she wants to stay awhile
And she will be loved
And she will be loved
And she will be loved
And she will be loved

[in the background]
Please don't try so hard to say goodbye
Please don't try so hard to say goodbye

Yeah
[softly]
I don't mind spending everyday
Out on your corner in the pouring rain

Try so hard to say goodbye

March 3, 2006
7:03 pm
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codyrn
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This song is by "The Who" although Limp Bizkit does a version of it.

Behind Blue Eyes

No one knows what it's like
To be the bad man
To be the sad man
Behind blue eyes

No one knows what it's like
To be hated
To be fated
To telling only lies

But my dreams
They aren't as empty
As my conscience seems to be

I have hours, only lonely
My love is vengeance
That's never free

No one knows what it's like
To feel these feelings
Like I do
And I blame you

No one bites back as hard
On their anger
None of my pain and woe
Can show through

But my dreams
They aren't as empty
As my conscience seems to be

I have hours, only lonely
My love is vengeance
That's never free

When my fist clenches, crack it open
Before I use it and lose my cool
When I smile, tell me some bad news
Before I laugh and act like a fool

If I swallow anything evil
Put your finger down my throat
If I shiver, please give me a blanket
Keep me warm, let me wear your coat

No one knows what it's like
To be the bad man
To be the sad man
Behind blue eyes

March 3, 2006
7:08 pm
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Anonymous
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Sooooooo, Lolli, how ya doing today? Have any updates you feel like sharing? Hope you had a good week!

Love, plz~

March 3, 2006
7:09 pm
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lollipop3
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codryn,

Okay, mine described our frienship. Yours described our relationship. LOL

Sad but true.

Lolli

March 3, 2006
7:12 pm
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codyrn
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One of my favorite groups:
....this says it for me.
Cross Canadian Ragweed - Lonely Girl

Sittin' there with you hair all in your face
Tears are fallin' like they're in a race
You look down, you look around, then you look up again
You get the feeling you can never win

(Chorus:)
Tell me your troubles lonely girl
What have you gotten in
You're confused in your own world
You just want the day to go away
So you can start it all over again

Life ain't easy, I'm telling you what everybody said
Yeah, they beat that horse until it's dead
Open your window, open your heart, open your eyes to see
Everything around you girl, it's meant to be

(Chorus)

March 3, 2006
7:14 pm
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codyrn
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Heah Lolli,

I am trying to be open to your song...but am so bitter that I can bearly read it 🙁

March 3, 2006
7:18 pm
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codyrn
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A Song about life for any and all of us...by my favorite group.....

Cross Canadian Ragweed - Pay

My dad, he had a friend, lowdown till the end
Everything he did, it came out wrong
No matter how hard he tried
He never cheated, he never lied
Had a shotgun in his hand when he died

Chorus
Everybody's got their own way, tomorrow's another day
Make of it what you will, as you're climbing up that hill
Always be prepared to pay

I know a man, a guitar in his hand
Taught me things I never thought I'd know
But the pills and the crystal meth took him to his death
All he ever wanted was a song and a sing along

Second Chorus
Everybody's got their way, tomorrow's another day
Make of it what you will, don't forget to get your thrills
Always be prepared to pay

Don't forget where you're from, stick to your guns
Always be good to your fellow man
Bow your head and pray, every single day
Life don't always turn out like you plan

Repeat first chorus

March 3, 2006
7:18 pm
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lollipop3
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Hi Plz,

My week has been HELL...thanks for asking. LOL Thank God it's over.

I"m doing okay. I seem to be getting stronger every day. There isn't too much to update. B/F and I have run into each other twice over the past week. It was cordial, brief small talk..the end. Although a little awkward, I am grateful that we are able to at least be amicable.

I'm not totally sure what he is up to...if anything, but when I got up this morning I found that he had cleaned all of the snow off my car from the storm yesterday. We got home at the same time so when I got out of my car I did thank him for that. Short and sweet. Then I went to my therapy appointment. She is convinced that he still thinks this is just part of the cycle and that he will continue to do "little things" all the while feeling me out. So far all he has gotten is a curtious, yet cool reception so he is still keeping his distance. She said it will only be matter of time before he turns up the pressure. I hope she is wrong, but considering she has ALWAYS been right, I'm guessing this time will be no different.

I'm just going to continue doing what I've been doing and going about my own business, living one day at a time. If and when he does turn up the pressure, I will deal with it then. I will try not to what if myself to death in the meantime.

That's about it around here....how are you holding up?

Love,
Lolli

March 3, 2006
7:23 pm
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mamacinnamon
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(((( Lolli )))))

Hang in there hon. 🙂

March 3, 2006
7:24 pm
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lollipop3
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((((codryn))))

March 3, 2006
7:25 pm
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lollipop3
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Thanks ((((Mama))))

It's good to hear from you.

Love,
Lolli

March 3, 2006
7:28 pm
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codyrn
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Heah Lolli and all;

I admire your steafast courager and perseverance ....really... I am waffling between ...being strong and on the edge at any given time....NOT showing it of course....but heah...gotta have control somewhere....right?

My counselor has provided little bits of advice....of course onyl been to 4 sessions....but I think she is seeing just how much tolerance I have for Bu%$shit ....ya know....it seems I have alot...
I appreciate your sharing with us.
codyrn

March 3, 2006
7:36 pm
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codyrn
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Song by Everlast...... if you can look beyond some of the blatant lyriscs the message to me is clear......... I really have sucj pitty for people..... I think we all do

What It's Like

We've all seen a man at the liquor store beggin' for your change
The hair on his face is dirty, dread-locked, and full of mange
He asks a man for what he could spare, with shame in his eyes "Get a job you ****ing slob," is all he replies
God forbid you ever had to walk a mile in his shoes
'Cause then you really might know what it's like to sing the blues
Then you really might know what it's like...
Then you really might know what it's like...
Then you really might know what it's like...
Then you really might know what it's like...
Mary got pregnant from a kid named Tom that said he was in love
He said, "Don't worry about a thing, baby doll I'm the man you've been dreaming of."
But 3 months later he say he won't date her or return her calls
And she swear, "God damn, if I find that man I'm cuttin' off his balls."
And then she heads for the clinic and she gets some static walking through the door
They call her a killer, and they call her a sinner and they call her a whore
God forbid you ever had to walk a mile in her shoes
'cause then you really might know what it's like to have to choose
Then you really might know what it's like...
Then you really might know what it's like...
Then you really might know what it's like...
Then you really might know what it's like...
I've seen a rich man beg
I've seen a good man sin
I've seen a tough man cry
I've seen a loser win
And a sad man grin
I heard an honest man lie
I've seen the good side of bad
And the downside of up
And everything between
I licked the silver spoon
Drank from the golden cup
And smoked the finest green
I stroked the fattest dimes at least a couple of times before I broke their heart
You know where it ends, yo, it usually depends on where you start
I knew this kid named Max
He used to get fat stacks out on the corner with drugs
He liked to hang out late he liked to get shit-faced and keep the pace with thugs
Until late one night there was a big gun fight and Max lost his head
He pulled out his chrome .45, talked some shit, and wound up dead
Now his wife and his kids are caught in the midst of all of this pain
You know it crumbles that way at least that's what they say when you play the game
God forbid you ever had to wake up to hear the news
'Cause then you really might know what it's like to have to lose
Then you really might know what it's like...
Then you really might know what it's like...
Then you really might know what it's like...to have to lose

March 3, 2006
7:47 pm
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exoticflower
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((((oh lolli)))), what happened to the no love song rule?

For me it's a song by the Cure--it used to be our song, the very song that we shared the day our daughter was conceived, and he used it in a subject line to the girl he was lying to me about all the time in an email. Which he sent her while I was laying in bed with our daughter while he went to 'get me some water'.

No Love-songs, I can't say it enough!!!

March 3, 2006
7:54 pm
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lollipop3
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(((Exotic)))...what a terrible thing to do...that's awful.

As far as the love songs go....I TRIED. I really did and I was doing good too. And yes, at first that song did make me cry (hard) but considering it is on every, single, solitary radio station and I CAN'T get away from it....I've gotten used to it and it really doesn't bother me anymore. At least it doesn't make me cry anymore.

I do agree with you though....NO LOVE SONGS.

Happy thoughts only :p

March 3, 2006
7:57 pm
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lollipop3
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Besides...it's more of an unrequited love song. Is that the same thing?

March 3, 2006
8:54 pm
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readyforachange
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Last night I heard that old 80's (I think) song....don't know the name or the band....but the refrain is:

"I won't cry for the wasted years, cause you ain't worth the salt in my tears."

Love that one! Gets you going when you're really p*ssed at the ex.

March 3, 2006
9:25 pm
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I love the (even older) Linda Ronstadt song, "You're No Good." Now, THAT one makes me feel good as I'm driving along. I sing along... 🙂

March 3, 2006
10:17 pm
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Hey Lolli! Glad your hell week is over! I can understand that concept as mine has been similar. Up and down, down and up...does it ever end??? lol

I think you have a very wise therapist, and she seems to have your bf's number (if you know what I mean), so I'm quite sure she is right on target. They are so predictable sometimes, aren't they? lol

I wrote mine an email today (concerning this week's Mardi Gras incident), so if you get a chance to read it, let me know what you think. I think I said it all, so like you said when you wrote your letter, if he decides not to respond, I feel like I'm getting a little closure anyway. I've been waiting months to say all of those things to him. Now whether or not he will HEAR them is another story. Not holding my breath. Oh yea, the thread is "I sent him this email today".

Well, hang in there. Any more flirting hair incidents with the guy at work? ha ha

Love, plz~

March 3, 2006
10:39 pm
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sdesigns
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Whidbey:

Ha ha. Great song. Its definitely a keeper. .....Baby you're no good.......

SD

March 3, 2006
11:41 pm
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I remember when the no contact club first formed, KC posted the words to "I will survive"....that's a good one. I find a lot of safety in 'those weeks' when I am listening to things like Midnight Oil, or The Band, things that speak about cultural or social issues instead of sad sad sad loving ones.

And for me, ANY song does it, unrequited or not--in the end it's a love song and if I'm in that mood I can find a reason it speaks EXACTLY to my situation...and cry about it the rest of the day. But that's just me, I thinhk we all know I have a flair for the dramatic! 😉 Gotta work on that...

March 4, 2006
6:55 am
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lollipop3
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LOL Exotic....very true, I think most of us have conditioned ourselves to "hear" what we want to hear.

Seriously, though...really, I'm not even kidding....that song describes our friendship to a T (except I'm not 18)....it actually makes me feel kinda guilty when I hear it. Although I honestly never intentionally used him. I really and truely treasured our friendship. But looking back I can see why he might have seen it that way.

Maybe he WASN'T kidding when he said I "hardened him as a person" :0

Okay...no love songs...unrequited or not.

March 4, 2006
11:13 am
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Hello Lolli,
For me it has always been "You Remain" Willie Nelson and Bonnie Raitt from the "The Great Divide" album. I am not really a country music fan but this song speaks to me. Every time I listen to it I can almost see her face. I remember how we started out and how it ended up. The lyrics without the vocals and music are not as touching but sad all the same.

What do you do with the sands of time
When they carve out lines around your eyes
I can close my fists up good and tight
But I can’t hold back the sands of time

What do you do with a memory
That just hangs around and stares at me
I can tear that frame down off the wall
But it won’t erase the things I saw

Night and day
Night and day
You remain
You remain

What do you do with old regrets
There’s a box full underneath the bed
Just close enough not to forget
But do what do you do with old regrets

There’s old house key in a kitchen drawer
To the door I can’t unlock no more
Sometimes I hold that key real tight
But what do you do after goodbye

Night and day
Night and day
You remain
You remain

sird

March 4, 2006
11:16 am
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lollipop3
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Sird,

I'm not a big country fan either but I absolutely love both Willie Nelson and Bonnie Raitt.

Thank you for sharing.

Lolli

March 4, 2006
12:40 pm
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Oh, I spent SOOO many nights crying my fool head off to Bonnie Raittes "Love Has No Pride"... And the entire stardust melodies album by Willi can make you hate yourself on the right day...stay away from country!!!!!!!

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