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Emotional Honesty
November 11, 2002
6:06 pm
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Cici
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Check out this site. It's REALLY good, for anyone to read, about emotional honesty, with yourself and loved ones:

Emotional Honesty

November 12, 2002
8:19 am
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jwt
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I can see a lot of myself in this article.

It does start in childhood. For me, it was not the repeated messages to keep my emotions inside. It was the messages that I was not good enough. I came to believe that I was not good enough for anything that I wanted to matter to others. In other words, I just forgot all about what I wanted and tried to be what everyone else wanted me to be.

It's a false and dishonest way to live. And, ultimately it has failed in every relationship I have ever had.

Everything in the article made perfect intellectual sense. But, after 40 years of living like this, I don't even know who I am any more. I wouldn't know an honest emotion if came up and smacked me in the face. And, worst of all, I don't know how to change it.

November 12, 2002
10:22 am
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mj
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Thanks for sharing this interesting link. My printer is going crazy right now.

November 12, 2002
10:38 am
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Cici
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Isn't that the rub" To be able to look at yourself honestly and acceptingly? I always have to do detective work. As in:

1. I feel an emotion right now
2. What is that emotion?
3. What immediately caused this?
4. Why would I feel this emotion because of the cause?
5. How to I feel physically? How am I treated other people, things, or animals?
5. How do my actions reflect whatever emotion I feel?

The biggest step is verbalizing that emotion. Like saying out loud, "I am angry." It can change your emotional state in strange ways...

November 13, 2002
8:16 am
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mj
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In the box of corn flakes:)

November 13, 2002
8:49 am
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beenthruthat
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jwt~

It's nice to see you are still doing some self exploration. You are right that it is hard to figure out your emotions when you actively have been burying them for decades.

But you are progressing. At least you know you buried the emotion. And, just like a young child, experiencing them again and figuring them out makes you feel so emotionally immature. Everyone resolves this problem in the same way. Since this was a repressed area in your life, you ARE emotionally immature. But, you can get the hang of it pretty quickly - months not years. So, keep plugging along.

You are changing your 'filter' - the way you view things because of your perceptions. Some emotions may feel overwhelming when you figure out where they come from, so hold on tight. As you get more and more healthy, you can then trust those emotions more.

I think of you often.

Jenny

November 13, 2002
9:34 am
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artist 2
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Hey CiCi,

Thanks for the link. However, why not add to the code "target="_blank" ?

If you do this, a NEW window will pop up and we won't lose our connection to the boards.

So, the link you posted here would look like this:

Emotional
Honesty

Thanks!

November 13, 2002
9:35 am
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artist 2
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Hey CiCi,

Thanks for the link. However, why not add to the code "target="_blank" ?

If you do this, a NEW window will pop up and we won't lose our connection to the boards.

So, the link you posted here would look like this (but add the close tag-I didn't add it here because it would turn into a real link):

Emotional
Honesty

Thanks!

November 13, 2002
9:36 am
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artist 2
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argh!! it did turn into a link....

It goes like this, but add the appropriate tags - you know how:

a href="http://eqi.org/ehon.htm#How%20society%20discourages%20emotional%20honesty" target="_blank">Emotional
Honesty

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