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depressed: why am I?
February 15, 2007
10:42 am
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StronginHim77
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In my State (Florida), the teachers are under tremendous and UNFAIR pressure because of the FCAT testing. The schools are rated, based on the kids' performance on these tests which are given once a year. If the kids do poorly, the teachers are in the hotseat and held responsible. Alot is at stake: their salaries, their jobs, etc. Terrible pressure. I don't know how any of the teachers can stand it. So, my heart really goes out to you.

I have been actively lobbying against this standardized testing since it began, over 12 years ago. The pressure is equally hard on many of the students, as well. Teachers are "teaching to the test" and students are drilled to excel in the test format. True teaching -- in its finest sense -- has fallen by the wayside, in deference to the FCAT's overinflated importance to both staff and students.

I would encourage you to leave the public school system and enter the private school sector. The pay is usually less, but the stress level is infinitely more humane and you will be able to truly TEACH again.

- Ma Strong

February 15, 2007
4:12 pm
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Tiger Trainer
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MA strong_
I am in Florida dealing with FCAT and FCAT Writes. All we have done this year is teach using the methods given to us by 'experts' I have kids that haven't received help that they need because they won't "give us bang for our buck" as the ass't principal says.

These kids dont' have enough love and attention at home and we are spendign our time organizing and analzying data rather than teaching them about life.

sorry I just had to vent

Thanks for the encouragement AG. You are soo good for my ego.

February 15, 2007
6:18 pm
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Tiger Trainer
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MA strong_
I am in Florida dealing with FCAT and FCAT Writes. All we have done this year is teach using the methods given to us by 'experts' I have kids that haven't received help that they need because they won't "give us bang for our buck" as the ass't principal says.

These kids dont' have enough love and attention at home and we are spendign our time organizing and analzying data rather than teaching them about life.

sorry I just had to vent

Thanks for the encouragement AG. You are soo good for my ego.

February 17, 2007
10:20 am
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Tiger Trainer
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Tired of fighting these unmotivated kids. Tired of amidnistration wondering why we are not progressing and pressuring us to teach teach teach the test.

tired of not teaching my way. Tired of husband needing needing needing all the time.

3 day weekend. going to spend it cleaning house. that will be awful but i will enjooy a clean house.

February 17, 2007
10:49 am
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atalose
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Bless you Tiger, I also feel it's so unfair to expect so much from the teachers. I commend anyone in the teaching field. Parents these days put so much off and onto the teachers it's insane. I understand the need for dual incomes but so much of the parents responsibility has been put off on the teachers. If a child fails to do homework or study for tests, it's the teachers fault. If a child then fails the class, it's the teachers fault. If the children don't do well on these tests, it's the teachers fault.
I have a friend who never makes her kids do anything, especialy homework or study for quizes or tests, then when the school year ends and her kids have faile and need to attend summer school, it's the teachers fault. I can't believe in the past 6 years her children have gotten every single bad teacher possible!!! lol
Again I commend you and the wonderful job you do for all the children.
I had a freind who used to teach in the inner city, she was so burned out not only from the kids and the unavailable parents but also her co-workers who also were unhappy. She did leave the public school system and went to a private school. Her whole attitude and outlook changed and she was able to remain doing what she loved.

Atalose

~~Hope has a place, but not above reality~~

February 17, 2007
8:58 pm
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Tiger Trainer
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Yes it's funny we have the kids for 6 hours a day for 180 days a yet we are responsible for making sure that they make a year's progress in a year's time. never mind that theuy have to deal with addicts for parents or shoot outs in their neighborhoods or abuse at home. Never mind that they started kindergarten never having even seen a crayon much less a book. Nope the teachers must make sure that 4th graders read, write, and do math on a 4th grade level. A leve that was set by politicians not teachers.

Boy am I on a roll tonight!!
Let's think positive..... OOOH I had a agreat Valentine's day. my husband gave me ballooons and a tiny heart necklace. I had amigraine and couldn't go out to dinner but he was sweet and romantic.

yes that is certainly positive.

You all are so good to me. You have given me the courage to finish my year out and possibly move on to another school or maybe a community college somewhere.

February 18, 2007
1:11 pm
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StronginHim77
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You are a "born" teacher. If you have to, bail out of the Florida FCAT System and go into the private/collegiate sector. Just don't quit doing what you so obviously are called to do: teach.

- Ma Strong

February 18, 2007
4:45 pm
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Tiger Trainer
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I can't quit teaching because that's all I know how to do. šŸ˜‰

but you have given me the courage to start looking in other sectors.

I had some positive thoughts at church today. (those of you who would be offended by mention of God can bail out now)
There was parable of a guy who was asked by God to push a rock. He pushed for days and days and the rock never moved. finally he told God he was a failure because the rock never moved. God said. I never told you to move it I told you to push it. Now you are strong from pushing. I will move the rock.

Maybe that's what my teaching this year has been. just pushing. I 've grown from it and Ishouldn't get discouraged.

February 18, 2007
5:06 pm
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mj
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What a great story Tiger.

February 18, 2007
9:20 pm
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Tiger Trainer
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It's great story. I believe it now but will believe tuesday afternoon after another day with my little darlings?

I have found a small community college looking for a part time teacher with my experience. I am going to get my resume in order and see what happens.

February 19, 2007
2:41 am
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Anonymous
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TT,

That is great about the part time job oppertunity. It is good to "go fishing" for other jobs even when you are satisfied with the job you have because it can mean a pay raise if you tell your current job you are being offered more money for another job.

Sometimes they do the please stay thing and up your salary, just so they don't have to replace you. šŸ™‚

That is way it said in one of the zillion job books my husband read as he searched for meaning in what sort of job he wanted.

Yeah, I feel like I am pushing rocks too. I have been having this feeling that I should do a juice cleanse...so I acted on it, but seriously I couldn't do it after working for 6 hours and having more time to go and my boss looked concerned when i said I didn't want to order something for lunch.

I made it 2 days...started over...almost made it one day today...I guess I will start over tomorrow. 3 days. That is all I need.

I wasn't feeling supported by my husband since he was playing video games all day...he didn't go to church, but he at least did a load of dishes, but otherwise 8 hours of video game playing.

So I didn't catch up on my classes from the 3 snow days. Maybe I should paint now that it is 2:40 in the morning. I can't sleep. I have pain behind my eyes.

February 19, 2007
1:24 pm
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Tiger Trainer
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Well I just read an article on teacher burn out and that's what I've got. defineatly time to start looking else where. time to go back to language teaching.

Yeah men can do that. 8 hours of video playing. C can watch TV for hours and hours and not see all the laundry, dishes etc piling up. He usually spends his day off watching the sci fi channel. I spend min doing laundry. . . then he wonders where the clean towels are.

February 19, 2007
2:07 pm
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mj
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Good for you Tiger T. Remember the commericials....There Great.....

You are Doing Great cause you are checking out your resources and choosing to do something about your situation. By what I see posted just above, have you considered that your responsibilities are disapportionate to hubby's? Have you read the new chapter on Removing the Victim on our book study Liberation side?

February 20, 2007
5:27 pm
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Tiger Trainer
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MJ no but I will. I read Codenpendent no more a couple of years ago but I need to read it again.

February 20, 2007
6:21 pm
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Anonymous
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TT,

Depressed: why am I?

hmmm...because you are doing it all...maybe...I get depressed when I feel that way.

February 21, 2007
6:00 pm
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Tiger Trainer
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Well here I am doign it all again. That awful man from the dept of ed. is coming again tomorrow. He's the one that wrote up the unfair repoart (also illegal according to CTA) anyway my classroom is clean and I've got great lesson planned just wya he wants them. Now if only my stduents will give me a break.

February 21, 2007
6:03 pm
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Tiger Trainer
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Mj,
I am still thinking about if my responsibities are disproportinate to my husbands. I don't know. I do more housework (but not enough) I earn more than he does but work less. He does most of the actual paying of bills....He sets up are couples counseling sessions....I dont' know. I am sure that in the past I've sacrificed more than he has but I am not doing that anymore.
I actually told him that I didn' have energy for the plans he had for Valentine's day and he willingly went to the restaurant of my choice.

He's never been that flexible before.

February 22, 2007
11:37 am
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mj
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Hope that your Day today goes much better with this man observing. Sounds like you are prepared!

I am glad that you are making strides with your husband. Asking for what you need is always a great way to take care of yourself.

February 22, 2007
3:24 pm
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soprano2
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Tiger--this is my first time reading through this thread. Wish that I had known about it earlier, I could have let you know that I feel the same way about teaching sometimes.

I have been in both elementary and high school. Although I do not teach one of the core subjects, I am expected to teach the standards of the test anyway.

(okay everyone, let's sing this phrase again, and by the way, what is the subject and verb in this phrase?) -just kidding. I don't really do that.

For me, these tests are a philisophical struggle. Do we teach children or do we teach tests? This is a huge problem in our society today. A problem that Mr. President is failing to see as he keeps "leaving no child behind."

TT--You seem very frustrated, which, to me shows that you still care. But I am glad that you recognize it and are doing something about it.

I would love to continue this conversation sometime with you. I believe that teachers need to stick together. I have tons of bad things to say about this educational system. I usually don't find people to share my ideas with. I am always here for you if you need it.

s2

(((((TT))))) from one teacher to another.

February 22, 2007
5:05 pm
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Anonymous
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TT,

I hope that your day being watched went well. A little nerve racking?

I am glad we all know each other's threads now. šŸ™‚

I am glad Soprano found your story. šŸ™‚

February 23, 2007
5:57 pm
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Tiger Trainer
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I tha tyou all here for me. However I wimped out. I woke up yesterday with a scratchy throat, and a stuff nose and a fever. Ordinarly I would have gone to work but being sick was too much stress so I called in sub. (I had great lesson plans) I feel like I let myself down.

I went to school otday and heard the guy scold the other teachers for not doing things properly and was glad that I had wimped out but this can't become a habit.

February 23, 2007
5:59 pm
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Tiger Trainer
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S2
thanks for reading my thread and sympathizing. Our tests start next week. Yes 3/4 way through the school year and if we are lucky we will get the results in May. well after the test, I get to go back to teaching the whole child. we can relax and do some creative stuff sing, art read some books just for fun. Maybe I won't be so burned out then.

February 23, 2007
6:05 pm
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tiedupinknots
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Teach them 'The Secret'
all mental illnesses arise because people think they are their minds/their personalities. That we are separate. What you really are at your core is limitless and without end. Once you experience your True Self you will realize you are not your mind and your depression will evaporate in the light of your new awareness. It takes time it is the life process but we could help the kids by teaching it to them from day one. First help yourself though by learning about The 'Power of Now.' When you are ready for more of 'The Secret' Eckhart Tolle is a good place to start.

February 23, 2007
6:51 pm
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Tiger Trainer
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are you saying am not what my mind says I am? I am limitless? I am very intrigued.
I heard other posters mention this sounds like something i need to check out

February 24, 2007
4:05 pm
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Taking a break from frantic house cleaning. they are coming to fix the disposall today. I am a bit shocked. it took only 45 minutes to get my kitchen and dining room in passable condition. why can't I just clean it like that every couple of days?

Oh well, I also need to do some laundry so I'll have clothes next week. Good luck everyone.

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