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Crazy codependent guy has another question!!
November 21, 2001
5:40 pm
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messedupagain
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September 30, 2010
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Ok so apparantly there is no "statistic" out there as to how long these "type" marriages last (especially a 4th one). (damn, now she's just going to have to take my word for it....haha!) So the answer is....1 week--forever, whichever comes first. Great!

I think I am feeling hopeless right now....post-wedding shock. Since this has been the longest relationship I've ever had and I admit I've had somewhat better relationships too...then I guess I'm thinking I'm so far into this "addiction" that I just don't have the strength to end it. Isn't that how addictions go when left untreated for too long.....just get worse and worse??? Isn't that why some people die from drug and alcohol addiction because they just waited too long and were too far gone??
And it seems unlikely that she will leave me if she hasn't already....not to mentiion she has it pretty darn good here. Man, I have a headache.

November 21, 2001
5:53 pm
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Molly
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So, take two asprin, and get to work. Sure she thinks its fine, and could last for ever as long as your satisfied with what ever bone she tosses you, when she chooses to toss one. Since you have basically picked women that appear to need you.... even though you did a couple of months work, and read some books, my bet is that you still need some more. One of the reasons that I came back, was that hubby, had dropped over a hundred pounds, working out 4-5 days a week, got his diabetes under controll, and talked a good talk. I knew he had been in therapy for over 2 years, and had done some anger management workshops, and when he showed up on my door step, looked like the guy I met, and used to have fun with. But shortly after my return, slowly but surely most of his personality traits started to appear.
it wasn't until I checked the site on narcissism that I really got it, about him, and me and the dynamics between us. She doesn't sound willing to work with you, that could be because she likes it the way it is. That is like moving a mountain. So what are you going to do about it?
Addictions are like a sink hole, when you bottom out, what ever your bottom is, then you change. You change for you, only you. When your sick and tired of feeling sick and tired. You could check out a coda meeting, or drirenes.com web site.

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