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Codependent vacation
March 21, 2005
9:19 pm
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Almosthappy
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September 27, 2010
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Me, mother of 3. I am going to take all of my kids to see my oldest sons father/family who has not seen him in almost a year, mind you it is a 300 mile drive. I pay for everything. I have told my sons father that I am coming in my last three letters (which I send the monthly medical bills) that he never pays...and my X called me to ask, when we were coming and if I wanted him to by the Easter basket for my son. I want to choke him! I am stressed out and I want to cancel the trip.

March 21, 2005
10:20 pm
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readyforachange
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September 27, 2010
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almosthappy....I would ask myself, "Is this how I want to spend my Easter weekend with my kids?" "Is it going to be a good experience for me and them?"...

You really aren't obliged to take your children to see him....if he has not taken financial responsibility for his son, why is it your responsibility to pay for the trip to go see him? Why can't he come to see his son? Why can't he pay your way if he can't travel?

If he can't read the dates you are coming when you've told him three times, maybe he doesn't really care that you are coming. I mean, if he really wanted to see his son, wouldn't those dates be circled on his calendar after you've told him three times? Wouldn't he be counting the days until he would see his son again after such a long time? Why doesn't he know when you are coming...

Sorry if it sounds like I'm asking such harsh questions.....but I want you to really think about this. Don't do something you will regret later....don't enable him further to be an absent father. If he wants to see his son, let him put forth some effort.

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