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child abuse and visitation
February 8, 2006
10:27 am
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2alone
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I'm updating a thread I sent about 2 months ago. Both of my girls told their pediatrician and therapist that their dad touched them in their private parts. Child Protective Services was contacted and a full investigation was done. I haven't received the report but I was told yesterday that they couldn't substantiate the claims of the girls. My girls are 5 and 3 - so I wasn't suprised because they can't give much detail of where things happened or when, and they wouldn't make good witnesses in a criminal trial. I learned that the court is making me bring the girls to him for visitation this weekend. I am sick! There is nothing I can do about it. He hasn't seen the girls for 2 months nor has he spoken with them on the phone even though we called him every week and often left messages. I am asking that you all pray or think good thoughts for my girls and what they need to go through...please.

February 8, 2006
1:12 pm
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hopeful for change
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You must be scared, I will pray for you and the girls. I am heartbroken to hear this. Have you talked to a lawyer? Could you get a court order of protection for the kids? I don't understand what is going on here...if they told the dr.?? Are they going to supervised visitation?????

Ofcourse a dr isn't going to be able to detect molestation of a little girl unless their is forcible rape or penetration. The girls would have to be able to talk to them about what has happened.

How do the girls feel? Have the girls been going to therapy? From my own personal experience as a child, this is very traumatic, when a family member does this it confuses you greatly. Well it does alot of things.

I will pray for your family.

February 8, 2006
2:14 pm
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mamacinnamon
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Prayers will definitely go up.

Call your attorney and tell him you want supervised visitation. I know the system sucks. Been thru it myself. Tell the attorney the girls don't want to go, they are afraid. Tell the attorney you are afraid for the girls since all this went on and that you are afraid he'll do it again. Call the DFS (social services) and ask for your worker's supervisor and tell him/her the same thing you tell the attorney.

If you don't voice your concerns they can not hear you. Call daily; go down there in person. Do whatever you can to keep him from bein alone w/ the girls.

Are you on descent terms w/ his folks? If they are close then call his mom (only if you think she will do something about it) and tell her what is goin on and can she go stay w/ him while he has the girls. IF you think it will not come back on you.

I am so sorry for this. I've seen it over and over. But if you don't keep at them then they will not know your fear and concern.

Oh, and don't make it about you using I I I .... say but the girls said; the girls told me; the girls are acting........

February 8, 2006
3:55 pm
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OopsADaisyFuentes
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Grrrr..this makes me so angry to hear things like this. When are we gonna listen to the children and believe them? when do they get a voice?? The court system is whacked and we all need to do something about it.

In the meantime..do all you can to find out how you can get a supervised visit instead. to just put them with him with no supervision is completely ludicrous. As mac said..call your attorney..the CPS whatever you need to do. Legally you can only do so much or he can turn the tables on you, so find out from your attorney what can be done. I know the horrific feelings you are going thru. You feel helpless..but dont give up. do all you can. and pray..i will keep you all in prayer as well.

February 8, 2006
4:58 pm
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mamacinnamon
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Oops...

I don't necessarily think it's not listening to the kids. It's the ones that scream abuse just to stick it to the ex that is causing those of us that need help to not get it.

Kinda like social security and welfare. The abusers of the institution cause those that need the help to not get it.

Makes my heart hurt so much for the kids.

February 10, 2006
5:29 pm
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how is everything???????? Any updates?

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