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Caught wife cheating on me.. But, not like what you think!! What should i do
December 29, 2005
9:57 am
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Doobie
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Hi, before i write this message, I would just like to be very clear about this. This is not a joke, and I will take your comments very serious. I'm not sure if i should see a counseler in real life about this or just talk to my wife about this.
I'm not the jealous type of person, but my wife has been acting real strange. She's been spending almost too much time with my pet.. His name isnt doobie though. heh
Every time i ask to take the dog somewhere, she offers to take him.. And things like that.
Almost a week ago, I was at work, and i forgot some papers i needed to turn in so I ran home, and when i came inside the house, i found my wife naked in the living room. She told me she was getting dressed. I noticed the computer monitor was off but I did not say anything.. The computer video camera was pointing towards her which made me very nervous. I use the computer but not often.. I'm not very smart with computers myself, so thats why i have never seen anything weird on it before. I waited a couple days before I actually had time to see what was going on. I decided to flip on the computer when she wasn't home and search around on this. I found some video's.. They were video's of her having sex with our pet dog. Just thinking about getting a divorce now.. And i'm also very sad because I've been married to her for 7 years.
If i went to counseling, they would probably thing i'm nuts.. And i don't know what to really do. Not sure if i should talk to her about it, or even what to say..
I'm very sad about this and would like to know what you guy's think about this.
Thanks.

December 29, 2005
10:02 am
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CAMER
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wow!!!! this is crazy.........the poor dog!!!! i have "heard" of people having sex with animals, which i am so against, but seems like there can be some issues here with her.

I'd confront her now!!!! think of your poor dog, looking for unconditonal love, not sexual love from a human. To me that's sick, just my opinion.

And trust me, counselors have heard of everything out there in this world and having sex with pets would be no
different.

December 29, 2005
10:05 am
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jjjkj
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Neigh

December 29, 2005
10:10 am
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enoch
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Call the ASPCA and run for the hills

December 29, 2005
10:15 am
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Doobie
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I would take my stuff and my dog and go roomate with a friend but telling them that my wife had sex with our dog is not something i want to do..

December 29, 2005
10:21 am
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mamacinnamon
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Doobie:

I agree w/ Camer. Confront her about this now. Have one of the videos ready to play back for her coz you know she will probably deny it. That way you can sit her down and make her look and see that you do know for sure. Kinda like saying I didn't steal the cookie but has cookie crumbs all over the fingers. Have the evidence ready when you confront her.

I also agree w/ Camer that most counselor's have heard more than any of us would want to know. If you call a counselor ask if they have ever treated anyone w/ beastiality (is this the right word?).

Get the pet away from her. If you have a place to take it like daycare or if you have to give it away. I don't know alot about animal behavior, but I think once they learn something they will keep doing it unless behaviorally changed.

So sorry to hear this, and that you are having to deal w/ it. The quicker dealt w/ the better.

December 29, 2005
10:30 am
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miss_tater_head
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Ask yourself why she taped it.

December 29, 2005
11:20 am
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overcome
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If this is real, this is the most bazarre post

I have ever read! It sounds like maybe she had some sort of Internet business going.....Are you in financial need? Have you noticed your wife spending more money?

Look, I would not take this personally. I mean it sounds like your wife has some obvious issues. But don't let it knock you down.

If it was me, I would confront her, have a place to stay beofer the confrontation and then I would leave.

December 29, 2005
1:19 pm
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addicts wife
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I have heard of women who Use thier dogs to give them oral pleasure... but it was mostly when "the guys" were telling jokes.. but i do believe things like this happen more than we'd all like to acknowledge, sadly.
I would confront your wife abouthtis asap. and the above suggestion(s) of having the video there while confronting I believe is a good suggestion. I dont know how your maraige is otherwise but perhaps you could talk about the underlying issues that brought her to this strange behavior... If she is willing, you are married and with maraige there is suposed to be working on issues together as a team... so perhaps approaching this as something to work on rather than an attack/ or accusatory((is that a word??)) manner will enable her to be more recptive to discussing this If she doesnt feel shamed, or guilted into a touchy subject matter.
As upsetting and saddening as this discovery is, I think if you approach it in a calm manner ((If possible)) you have room for solutions.
And yes, counselors have heard things that a lot of us cannot fathom, so As uncomfortable as this is for you, I would try to remember that they have "heard it all" and have counseled many different folks from all walks of life on many many issues, and I think it sounds like a valid, and real reason to get a proffesional, unbiased educated sounding board for resolution, and validation.
and we are always here for support, andto vent to in the meantime.
Sincerely,
~AW

December 29, 2005
1:53 pm
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kathygy
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Doobie,

I have heard of this. There's a whole movement of people into having sex with animals.

I don't know why people do this but some do.

As soon as you get it out with a therapist you will feel better. Don't hold it inside.

If it were me I would probably need some time to process this but do confront her about it. It sounds like she made it easy for you to find out what she was doing which makes me think she wanted you to find the tapes. Maybe that added to her erotic feelings. Who knows.

If you leave her and take the dog you are not obligated to tell anyone why you left.

December 30, 2005
10:40 am
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taj64
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Wow, I cannot believe she would tape that. I agree probably a cry for help. Maybe she needs some counseling for this type of behavior of having sex with a dog. I would suggest talking to her and openly discussing this without judging her. Yes confronting the issue right away is the best solution and then take it from there.

December 30, 2005
10:55 am
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Mishy2sons
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"I would take my stuff and my dog and go room with a friend but telling them that my wife had sex with our dog is not something I want to do.."

I just want to say that you owe no one an explanation! If you choose to leave your wife, you don't have to tell a soul why unless you want to. It is your personal business and you have every right in the world to keep it that way if you choose. If questioned you can always say, "I had to leave for personal reasons."

December 30, 2005
11:32 am
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DoTheyNetwork
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Doobie I can understand that sinking feeling you must have had. Can you tell where see has been in the Internet ? Open your browser and see what cookies you can find and Print that out and put it in a safe place. Find the functuion on your browser that keeps a log of what websites she has visited and print it. Use the Help menu if you have to. If you look and see that these functions are all empty that means that she is covering her tracks and deleting them.

Find a professional that can tell you about the dog. How does this effect him?

There seems to be an epidemic of this on the internet.

You came to the right place. There is much Wisdom on this list.

December 30, 2005
11:59 am
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mamacinnamon
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DoThey:

Good idea.

If she is deleting things usually files she has taped go to the "recycle bin" before gone for good. Unless she knows computers, she may not know this.

December 30, 2005
1:09 pm
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Matteo
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Doobie,

I am sorry to hear that. It must be hard, I am sorry I cannot imagine how frustrating it must be to find out something like this about your wife. I probably would be furious, hurt and shocked.

Counseling? Yes for you to overcome these feelings. For her - surely she needs it, but it is not your concern. I would not, not, not go to the couple counseling, I would not try to save this marriage no matter what; she crossed the line - but that's my opinion.

I would make a copy of the video and keep it in a safe place outside of your home, you may need this, as an evidence during the divorce procedure later on - because except the counselor - who is going to believe you? Maybe just having it would be enough for her not to play innocent and not try to prove that you are breaking marriage for no reason, because I am sure you wouldn’t want to show it to anyone. She may want, but not necessarily in the court.

I would pack and leave, not sure about the dog. I don't think I would want to keep him as my pet anymore either. Gee, what a surreal mess!

December 30, 2005
2:46 pm
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DoTheyNetwork
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What about the Police ? Detectives ? Is that Illegal ? The police may have a Computer Forensic expertor could find one. Much of what you are telling us about is out there for children to find on the internet. You would do a great survice to many through getting this looked into.

Sorry if this sounds blunt. I have a friend honking the horn in front of my place and have to leave now.

December 30, 2005
3:06 pm
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Matteo
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taj 64,

You cannot believe she would tape it? I can, I think taping it is the smallest part; what about actually doing it?? That what bothers me the most! Did they have protected sex, by the way (I am not expecting an answer) Yuck!!!

Sex with animals is not a normal human behaviour, but whatever pleases others without hurting anyone else is fine with me. In this case she is hurting her husband. If he knew from the beginning what she enjoys and was fine with that - that would be a different story, and we probably wouldn't read about it here.

Yeah the taping might be for her pleasure, or the pleasure of others, I don't think the latter is legal.

December 30, 2005
8:00 pm
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addicts wife
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I know you can loook in the borwser to see prior visited websites, but also.. IF this is a criminal offence, and charges are brought against her, detectives MAY and can take the computer as evidence, as EVERYTHING is stored in the hard drive, even things deleted and removed from the recycle bin.
((That's what they do with "trolls" who download illegal child pornography and that sort of thing.

Good advice though to keep your own records, outside of the home, adn it never hurts to have these things IF/when things go t ocourt... If you don have anything but your word, most likely the judge will NOt judge in your favor, becasue they always need te burden of proof, wether its a contract, a reciept, or a video of this nature.

December 30, 2005
8:21 pm
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Rasputin
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This is horrendous!!!

December 30, 2005
8:58 pm
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Lostrose
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Not sure if anyone has said this, "how about calling the humaine society?" I bet they would interfere & take care of the problem.

December 30, 2005
9:14 pm
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lost and found
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i would take my dog and go somewhere where she isn't. then, ask yourself why u are not mad, and upset over your wife's adultery. (even if it is with a dog.) i don't think i would give flying frog what people thought. take the computer with u. and think......

December 30, 2005
9:24 pm
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hbdude2k
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Wow!!! Did she grow up on a farm by chance? Dude, take your s*%t and leave right now because this is not a normal person at all. Don't even think twice. Ok, lets say you took her back, would you really have sex with this person again?, SO, don't even think of looking back. Keep moving forward as far away as possible.....YIKES!!!

December 30, 2005
9:26 pm
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lost and found
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give the dog a good, looonnnggg bath and brush his teeth...

December 30, 2005
9:35 pm
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Shaney
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doobie - I'd confront her, for sure. It may be embarassing to you, but imagine how humiliated SHE'LL be when you confront her with what you've found. It's terrible any way you look at it. She could be doing it for money on the the internet, you never know. See what she says, and then decide what to do. You can't run from it - just confront it and get it over with. See what happens and then go from there - we'll support you.

December 30, 2005
9:38 pm
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Shaney
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Hey all - doobie's first line in his post, stated that he was serious. Can we give him serious support and advice - that's why we're here.

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