Avatar
Please consider registering
guest
sp_LogInOut Log In sp_Registration Register
Register | Lost password?
Advanced Search
Forum Scope


Match



Forum Options



Minimum search word length is 3 characters - maximum search word length is 84 characters
sp_TopicIcon
Calling Out Rouxlady
February 3, 2007
10:06 am
Avatar
ggfred4
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline
101sp_Permalink sp_Print

What else? not sure what you are asking about...of course, I haven't had my diet coke this a.m.

February 3, 2007
10:16 am
Avatar
bevdee
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 259
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline
102sp_Permalink sp_Print

GG-

like some people skills? You talked about a hook. And you must have acquired some insight into behaviour, working with kids all these years.

February 3, 2007
5:57 pm
Avatar
ggfred4
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline
103sp_Permalink sp_Print

I have been pondering on and off today on how to answer your question. I just know what I expect from my students and how to deal with them, but people skills? not sure

February 3, 2007
10:44 pm
Avatar
bevdee
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 259
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline
104sp_Permalink sp_Print

People skills - "how to deal with them". That is what I meant. YOu may not realise it, but it's a sense you develop over time, in dealing with people.

This is a little different,but if I have a cranky, irate patient, I know to schmooze him/her. BUT - I don't need to get them to learn, I just need them to hold still for a few, and if they need more education than I can give them, I get someone else!!

What did you do good for yourself today?

February 3, 2007
10:54 pm
Avatar
ggfred4
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline
105sp_Permalink sp_Print

I think I knew what you were asking, but not sure of my answer. It is amazing the skills I have attained in my education experience with kids. I am aware of these skills in the classroom and have many views on my philosophies therein. I was just stuck on relating it with people in general as I tend to have issues with relationships among adults.

Now for what I did good for myself? Another hard question....does cleaning out a cabinet count? It did make me feel good. Okay, I did have a long chat with two close friends today and that was good for me...

And you?

February 3, 2007
11:18 pm
Avatar
bevdee
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 259
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline
106sp_Permalink sp_Print

Rouxlady

I have done laundry and put it away all day. I got groceries and stayed under my budget. I took another test and did well. This course is cake. I have been watching movies and ironing this afternoon. To relax.

Yes, cleaning out a cabinet helps. I do feel better when things are straightened up.

It's always good to talk to old friends, isn't it?

February 3, 2007
11:58 pm
Avatar
ggfred4
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline
107sp_Permalink sp_Print

I am glad you felt the same about the cabinet. I like reorganizing and throwing things out. It does make me feel good. I have been made fun of it in the past by many including my h.

Sounds like you had a great day today! My son is in and wants me to make crawfish fettucine tomorrow, so that is for lunch. It is one dish that everyone loves at my house.

I have been trying to read some threads concerning relationships because I am very concerned about one of my daughters. She has been dating this guy for 2 years, she is 21, and I think both of them are verbally abusive to each other and they fight all the time. She has broken up with him several times, but always goes back. There are other issues that concern me, but I guess it is out of my hands???

February 4, 2007
12:26 am
Avatar
bevdee
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 259
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline
108sp_Permalink sp_Print

I believe it is out of our hands, other than to talk to her. You know, my older niece is in a verbally abusive relationship. She says he slapped her a couple of times. Now, I am the expert on that, and she remembers the whole thing - and she won't listen to me.

It's really hard for me not to just scream at her - get out while you have the chance.

February 4, 2007
9:46 am
Avatar
ggfred4
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline
109sp_Permalink sp_Print

Bev, During their many breakups, her sisters and brother have told her what they think of the guy. The last breakup in Nov., I thought was permanent, and then I told her what I thought...Now, they are back together...ugh...I heard he was physically abusive once to her. Now this is my tough girl..She doesn't put up with shit, so I just don't get it. She has so much going for her. She is on a full paid academic college scholarship and is in junior year. He has no interest in her education. When she is away from him, she is happy and when she is with him, she is so angry. This is so frustrating...

February 4, 2007
10:29 am
Avatar
bevdee
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 259
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline
110sp_Permalink sp_Print

Rouxlady

"This is so frustrating... " I know. It's real hard to be a witness to it. You know, my sister lives with a man, and he is abusive to her. There is nothing anyone can do. She's an adult.

(((GG)))

February 4, 2007
10:48 am
Avatar
ggfred4
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline
111sp_Permalink sp_Print

So, is everything out of my hands here? I do remind her that I love her. Last night they were here and she got mad at him and threw her tennis shoe at him, kind of in play and anger. Then she walked away, he stood up and threw it hard back at her. This was in front of me and her dad. I held all my anger in and said nothing. My husband ignored it. I want to talk to her today about it.

February 4, 2007
10:54 am
Avatar
bevdee
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 259
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline
112sp_Permalink sp_Print

Well. Now if it were in my home? I would tell them BOTH that they were to respect me and my home. I will not put up with that.

I can't control what my loved ones allow or initiate, but I can set boundaries in my own home. I would make this very clear.

If your husband doesn't back you? It doesn't matter - it is your home and your boundary.

February 4, 2007
11:01 am
Avatar
ggfred4
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline
113sp_Permalink sp_Print

Thank you...I did have a "talk" with her when they first began dating. Now, I didn't even know him or about him, but I saw a drastic negative change in her behavior. Well, that talk led to her moving out and not speaking to me for months until we reconciled. It broke my heart. I guess I am afraid of that happening again. I still plan on talking to her today though.

February 4, 2007
11:07 am
Avatar
bevdee
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 259
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline
114sp_Permalink sp_Print

Did you talk to your husband about it? I had a thought, and I could be way wrong, but hat if he didn't say anything because he knows how you hate "fights" or disagreements. Just a thought.

I would think that he would be upset to see this mild violence between them. Shoot, I am upset to hear about it!!

If she doesn't speak to you for a while? Don't let that implied threat stop you from stating your boundary.

February 4, 2007
11:08 am
Avatar
bevdee
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 259
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline
115sp_Permalink sp_Print

Sorry - that doesn't sound like a suggestion does it? It sounds like an order!! I see that I come across that way when I feel strongly about something.

February 4, 2007
11:49 am
Avatar
ggfred4
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline
116sp_Permalink sp_Print

No apology needed; I take suggestions out of care, so thanks. I think my h didn't say anything because he wants me to be the "fall guy"...always has. He will tell me, "you need to tell her....yada yada yada..." so that he doesn't have to.

I am not backing off of what happened. I am still planning on talking to her, whenever she gets here...

February 4, 2007
1:16 pm
Avatar
ggfred4
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline
117sp_Permalink sp_Print

okay, screwed that up...she came in and I said what i wanted to say about last night and she just walked away...and went into her room...could have done that much better...she didn't say a word...

February 9, 2007
5:03 pm
Avatar
bevdee
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 259
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline
118sp_Permalink sp_Print

Rouxlady,m I am trying out aqua.

I missed your last two posts!! Has anything else happened with your daughter since that day?

How is it going with your old man? (husband)

I'm sending you positive energy and aqua thoughts.

February 9, 2007
5:03 pm
Avatar
bevdee
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 259
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline
119sp_Permalink sp_Print

Wow that's bright!!

February 9, 2007
6:03 pm
Avatar
ggfred4
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline
120sp_Permalink sp_Print

Wow, that was bright!!! TGIF!!!! What a week! Now that daughter has not really talked much since that convo, but seems okay. I have had to deal with another daughter since then and her anger issues...geez, parenting is so wearing!

Now my h is getting on my fricken nerves! With our children in college, all of a sudden we aren't needed as much, okay for financial reasons only...There are no more games to watch them play in (2 of mine played varsity sports and on tournament teams nearly year around) and no games to watch another one cheer at. So now we just seem to sit and look at each other and wonder who we each are? I am realizing how little I have in common with my h and that presents a lot of problems, because his way is the "right way" according to him. Okay, I will admit it, he bores me...gosh, I don't think I ever said that before. Usually we go out to dinner on Fri. nites, so I asked him this a.m. and he said he needed to work on the kid's taxes...

Have any plans this weekend?

February 9, 2007
6:14 pm
Avatar
bevdee
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 259
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline
121sp_Permalink sp_Print

GG-

I am still trying to decide. I have a gift certificate (xmas present from one of my jobs)- it's only wal-mart, but I was thinking of getting some purple bathroom stuff. Looking at purple calms me. Besides, in a small town, wal-mart is a gathering place- you will always run into someone you know!!

I am trying to talk my neighbor into going to the little marina store/grill/bar Sat night. It is free gumbo night, and the owner told me I wouldn't have to order drinks (since I don't drink). I think my neighbor should get out more - she doesn't agree. I know I need to. We'll see. I don't know if I could work up the nerve to go myself, I am considering it.

And I have to clean house again. The dogs track in alot of mud, and since I smoke, I dust and clean glass alot.

What did you like about your H when you married him?

February 9, 2007
6:29 pm
Avatar
ggfred4
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline
122sp_Permalink sp_Print

bev, glad you have some plans...I love shopping with gift certificates even though it may take me forever to decide on things...feel like a kid in a candy store!

Good question about the h:...hmmm...let's think back....I liked that my h was calm, safe, had a college degree, wasn't wild and crazy like guys my age (he is 7 years older than me),well-mannered, well-dressed,kind...at least that is what I think I remember...long time ago....

February 9, 2007
6:38 pm
Avatar
bevdee
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 259
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline
123sp_Permalink sp_Print

GG

Did you have any interests in common? Anything you did together?

February 9, 2007
6:47 pm
Avatar
ggfred4
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline
124sp_Permalink sp_Print

bev, that is one of our biggest problems...we have little in common...I can think of so many differences like...movies, music, hobbies, etc....I know we had similar goals and beliefs. Mainly we used to go to movies and dinner. He didn't like dancing and I loved to! I think we mostly did what he liked and if I wanted to do something I liked, I did it alone or with some girlfriends. Okay, I am depressed now...and worried about my future here...He just got home and asked me what I wanted to do...now that is a laugh...I don't know what I want to do...We need to go to Wal Mart and get a bite to eat...I think I quit thinking about what I would like because it usually gets some sort of negative response, so I think I gave up...

February 9, 2007
6:54 pm
Avatar
bevdee
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 259
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline
125sp_Permalink sp_Print

Well, if he asks you, then criticises the answer, ask him just to quit asking.

Forum Timezone: UTC -8
Most Users Ever Online: 349
Currently Online:
26
Guest(s)
Currently Browsing this Page:
1 Guest(s)
Top Posters:
onedaythiswillpass: 1134
zarathustra: 562
StronginHim77: 453
free: 433
2013ways: 431
curious64: 408
Member Stats:
Guest Posters: 49
Members: 111061
Moderators: 5
Admins: 3
Forum Stats:
Groups: 8
Forums: 74
Topics: 38621
Posts: 714411
Newest Members:
edenjames666, Sebastian Payne, Tia Phillips, NancySparks, Seapristes, modelmyparty
Moderators: arochaIB: 1, devadmin: 9, Tincho: 0, Donn Gruta: 0, Germain Palacios: 0
Administrators: admin: 21, ShiningLight: 572, emily430: 29

Copyright © 2020 MH Sub I, LLC. All rights reserved.
Terms of Use | Privacy Policy | Cookie Policy | Health Disclaimer | Do Not Sell My Personal Information