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Biggest mistake of my life
August 10, 2003
11:25 am
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Zinnie, I'd say that you are doing a great job with taking care of yourself!

This is another lesson learned well in life. Trusting your gut...changing what you can, and giving the rest back...

August 11, 2003
11:13 am
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Hi All,

Well, amazingly, I have not heard any more from... well anyone. I had my name removed from the bank account on Saturday, and mailed the bank book to him in prison.

So, what he does from this point forward, I don't care, and I don't want to know.

I imagine I'll be getting a "why, how could you? Poor me" letter soon.

But, I'm finally beginning to feel the weight lifting off of my shoulders.

I hope all of you are well.

Love,
Zinnie

August 11, 2003
11:36 am
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GGGOOOOOOODDDDD!!!!! YES!!!!!!!!! And you know what to do with that letter, right? You don't even open it. Just Return to Sender. Just the fact that he gets these letters back tells him - you're not engaging. If you kept one at this point, that would give him an indication he had a way in. Everything has to stay absolutely Closed to him when it comes to you guys. No Ifs about it.

Just glad to see you feeling better and to have taken the action you did. Good for you!!!! HUGS!!!

August 11, 2003
10:47 pm
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Hi All,

Well, we have discussed the phone situation, and it will be more trouble than it is worth at this point to change the number.

However, we are glad that we told the little one not to answer any message's that come across if she picks up, just hang up. She is nine, and we had some running around to do yesterday. She said that she wanted to stay home and watch the DVD that we had rented and hang out with the dogs. So, we were like... "well, o.k. fine, but you have the cell phone number if you need us."

So, she stayed home while we ran to the hardware store, and picked up some groceries, and did a few other little errand within a short distance of the house. Before we left, we popped up a bowl of popcorn, and she had some drinks. We left her propped up with the dogs, the remote, the phone and off we went. She said that about 10 minutes after we left she got a "robot call" - so she hung up. I asked if she listened to it at all, she said, no, she just hung up.

Well, hell it HAD to be him, as she said that after than, the phone started ringing every five minutes. Smart little critter that she is, she wrote down the times! I can't believe she did that. But, she did. We were gone for one hour and five minutes. Within that time, we had 20 phone calls. We checked the caller I.D., and that is all she had written down as well. I'm sure after the third or fourth time of the baby answering the phone he must have known she was by herself, and he kept calling. She asked who it was, we told her not to worry about it. I'm glad she is going home this weekend. Well, not really, but you know why. Anyway, we had only been home for about three or four minutes and the phone rang again. I did not answer it, hubby was outside getting the bags. When he came back in, I pulled him into the kitchen to tell him the scoop. The phone rang again, and he answered, and DECLINED the call. So, we did not hear any more, and I doubt if we will.

We blocked his mother's number from our phone, and she is far to lazy to write.

I'm sure we will be hearing a lot more from all of this. Also, I hate to say this, but I read over some of the letter's that he had sent me from day one. This is how stupid he is though on one hand. If he had shared the info with his lawyer that he did with me in his first letter, he would be free now. Maybe it is good he is so thick headed.

I hope all is well with everyone.

Zinnie

August 12, 2003
1:24 am
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Zinnie,

You are--hell, I'm speechless! I love the way of seeing that you chose the right path, because things just started to drop into place for you once you stood your ground. How nice of the A-hole to get you out of the Power of Attorney trap. He coulda worked that angle if he'd taken the time to think before he reacted.

And his momma, well, she tells her own story, don'tcha think? Momma knows all about her "baby" and she is trying her damnedest to wriggle out from under about a 4 ton load of guilt! I don't envy her.

Then there's your daughter. What a bright, shining little angel she must be in the midst of all this spiritual filth. I swear there were times when I had to deal with people like your cousin because of the kind of work I've done, and I'd feel like I needed to shower my soul--if that makes sense. What a smart child, and I admire you, Zinnie, for the fact that obviously you have taught her to allow her instincts to guide her, rather than teaching her that adults are the only "wise" decision makers in the world. Otherwise, she never would have written down the times of those calls. She'd have heard some grown-up's voice in her head telling her not to do it cuz she was being "silly". You and your husband must be wonderful parents.

I doubt your cousin and my sister would ever meet, and if they did, they wouldn't like each other. If they stood face to face, it would be too much like looking in a mirror. Besides, it takes a lot of investment in a victim before you get the pay-off, and between the two of them, they would never be able to agree on how exactly that could be "fair" to either of them... Sick, but true, I think.

Now, you're really in a place where you can start to tell your story on these boards and anywhere else you're needed--AND you can focus on you and your family the way you deserve to!

Don't forget to check out that movie "Signs"

Love,

Arwen

August 12, 2003
4:12 am
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Hi all,

Yes, Arwen you are right, he was quite thoughtful to let me out of that trap, I agree. There are several things that he has done since all of this happened, that had he thought of would have worked to his benefit. However, he reacts so quickly and in anger so often that is I think what ultimately was the final house of cards falling in on him.

And, yes, our youngest is a toot and a half, super smart. She has good instincts, combination of her natural mother, hopefully some of me, and my husband. She went with him on Saturday morning to the hunter's show. The two of them came home loaded with free give-a-ways. I'm sure the vendors loved seeing those two coming. You know I see her with my husband, and after dealing with this jerk in my life, my cousin not my husband. But, anyway, I'm so glad that she has him for a father figure in her life. So many people think we are crazy for acting like she is one of our own, but they don't realize the blessings she has bestowed on us. She is so smart, sweet, intelligent, and hilariously funny. We enjoy every moment with her. Our house will be so quiet after this next week. Of course, I still have my lunatic dog with his quacking duck driving me crazy, which is why I'm up now... he bonked me on the head with it an hour ago, and I cannot get back to sleep.

Anyway, yes this man's mother is I think where the root of his craziness is. She is nuts, and so many people just write her off as "Crazy Elaine" and say oh, she is stupid. Hell, stupid like a fox. She was telling me of all the government assistance she is getting, and this that and the other. She is making more money doing nothing then my husband and I do working. I kid you not! And, she is always looking for more, and everyone else owes it to her, and she does not know what else to do, or who else to call, etc., etc., etc.! You know when all of this first started, remember the time I flew out there to pack up his house, and here she was only 30 minutes away. Anyway, when I was leaving, she was standing out in the front yard crying and carrying on about how "he needs help, it is from being in Vietnam."

Dummy me, I wrote it off as "Crazy Elaine" - well, you know what, I have come to realize as hubby and I have discussed too often over the past few days she knew. I just cannot believe she did not know. That aside, they all tell each other everything. To the point of disgust. She starting telling us some stuff while we were there for the trial, and it was like... AAAAAAGGGGHHHHHH!!!! Surely, your children do not really share this with you? She says well why not? I mean no offense, but I'm not going to share my sexual exploits with my mother, brothers, sister or anyone for that matter!

Is she trying to get her four tons of guilt off of her? Well, I don't know, I think from what Ladeska has said, she is a pyscopath as well, as I don't know if she necessarily feels guilt, but she will try to pass responsibility off. After all, isn't that the real test of what makes us different from them? Taking responsbility for our own actions?

Off to try and get some sleep!

Zinnie

August 12, 2003
4:24 am
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Oh lastly, I meant to write this earlier, hoping for some feedback.

When all of this first came about, he claimed that is this was a mis-understanding from when his grand-daughter would spend the night with him and his wife and would sleep in their bed. Now keep in mind she was seven at the time, truthfully a little too old in my opinion to sleep with them instead of in her own bed, couch, pallet, sleeping bag, WHATEVER!

Now remember, he claims anytime this happens, it was a mis-understanding, a mistake, exaggeration. So he claims that any touching that MIGHT have happened was accidental.

Well, we had a serious thunderstorm one night last week, and the baby came and woke my husband up because she was afraid. It was really loud. So next thing I know, it is the baby, two dogs, 200 stuffed animals, my husband, the cat, and me in the bed. His excuse was well, we were crowded in there, and anything that happened was accidental, and my wife slept through it. Bull! Everytime, one of them moved I felt the whole bed do a group chain reaction. Aside from that, as much as my husband loves the baby, he plopped her on my side of the bed! You see, that is what a man of character would do. Although he did stay up with her, and talked to her until she fell back to sleep. They have been making up a story about a bear, who plays jazz music, and is now on a world trip. The imagination of both of them is special!

O.K. off to bed for real this time!

Love,
Zinnie

August 12, 2003
11:36 am
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That was so sweet........I just love hearing about you and your husband and all the kid stuff..makes me sit here and wonder what it would have been like to have had really good parents.... very foreign to me but very nice to hear. Makes me smile and cry at the exact same time.

You're doing so well, you really are. I'm just tickled pink that you've seen through him and are slam dunking him at every turn. They are all a sorry lot. Everytime you turn anything over as far as they are considered it's just going to be ugly. And yes, she is stupid like a fox. But......that arrogance and pride always trips them up. That's one real weak spot and blind side for them. So remember that one....

As far as the phone no. thing is concerned, please still consider changing it. I know it's hard and it would be alot of work to tell everyone, etc. - but it's just one more way that he can interfere in your life and that takes up alot of time and energy. I think it would really bother me if I knew he could call me like that. But, it is a pain in the butt to change it, I understand all that.

You just stay on your path here. You're learning quite a bit though, aren't you?

August 12, 2003
12:56 pm
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Zinnie,

Can me and my inner child come live with you? I promise to paint your entire house every color of the rainbow and then some...

Love,

Arwen

August 12, 2003
1:51 pm
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I wanna come paint, TOO!!!!

August 12, 2003
3:07 pm
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Of course you can all come paint! I would love it!

You know years back when I was diagnosed with uterine cancer, we tried so hard to have kids. Then the final answer was to either have a full hysterectomy now, or I would not be for this Earth much longer.

Even though this was the case, as I was under the age of 40 at the time, it was standard procedure to go talk to the "shrink" - as I guess they (the Dr.) wanted to make sure I knew this was final. Well, actually my husband and I both had to go. But, anyway our final report that was sent back to the Dr., the counselor actually said something like of all the folks who are unable to have children, this is really sad because we would make such good parents.

Don't get me wrong, I don't feel like my life has no meaning because we do not have any children of our own. Remember, these are my step-kids from my first marriage (my first husband passed away), so myself and my husband do not have any natural children. But, I must say that when we get such nice compliments, it does mean alot to me. It also means so much to me that you hear about the kids in a divorce don't get along with the step-parent. I have always gotten along with mine, and then when I remarried, they were all so happy for me. They even refer to my husband as their step-father.

I was lucky, I had awesome parents. You know what I was thinking about earlier. My sister is also getting married in a month, and I'm doing her cakes. But, anyway, as I said on another thread here somewhere that I love to cook. Well, when I was about three or four my Mom was pregnant and taking a nap, and I woke up from mine, and turned on the TV to watch The Galloping Gourmet (I'm aging myself here). Anyway, I thought I would surprise my Mom with a cake.

She wrote this in my scrapbook that she kept for each of us kids. I apparently used like three dozen eggs, 20 lbs. of flour, 20 lbs. of sugar, and a gallon of milk, and no telling what else! Can you imagine her "surprise" when she woke up to that mess. After all of these years, I still to this day remember my mom hugging me and saying it was sweet of me to think of her, but not to ever cook unless she was awake. So, we cleaned up the mess, and we picked out a cake recipe from the Betty Crocker cookbook, and she helped me make my first cake. To this day, some 40 years later, I still remember that. Clear as a bell.

Love,
Zinnie

August 13, 2003
1:14 am
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Dear Zinnie,

I hope you don't take this the wrong way, and I mean that sincerely, but...

I got a 17 year-old son who can't stop getting tickets and a 14 year-old daughter who still can't seem to get through 7 days straight sleeping in her own bed!

Now, honey, I know--and I'm saying this sincerely from the depths of my soul--you have thought to yourself a hundred times "What I wouldn't give to 'suffer' like these fools who have kids and don't know how lucky they are. And, Zinnie, most of the time, I do know how lucky I am, honest to all the gods in the world I do.

So, I'm not a bad person, it's just that they get a little exhausting sometimes--you know, the tickets, the marijuana and alcohol experimenting, coming home with hickies--what I'm trying to say is if you ever want to borrow a couple of teenagers who aren't as angelic as your little step-daughter, I have a couple down here that I could lend ya...

Okay, I AM being silly, here!

Ain't life weird,though, these two sides of the coin? The people who should have kids can't, the ones who are gonna mess them all up AKA: me, are the ones who have them. Wish I'd have known you when I was thinking about giving my daughter up for adoption. You would have been a better mother to her than I have been. And that's the truth!

My oldest sister got pregnant and had an abortion. Then she got a fibroid and lost an ovary. She never got pregnant again. Now, that makes sense to me!

Love,

Arwen

August 13, 2003
2:21 am
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Funny how life works... I myself can't have kids, even though I've been told I would make a great mom, but I'm sure that there is a reason for it. I'm 27 now, and have known about my inability to have kids since I was 16. My own family is so mental on both sides that I just figure it's natures way of saying "enough is enough" and letting someone else provide the genes for it. Anyway, genes or not, what really matters is the parenting that goes into raising the kids. That's something that everyone is capable of to a degree, even if the biological capacity isn't there, people can still be parents if they want to. Some of the best parent-child relationships I've ever seen have been adoptive relationships. Who cares what is "traditional"? All that matters is the love. Way to go, Zinnie.

August 13, 2003
3:47 am
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Thanks for your words all. Arwen if it makes you feel better... I have over forty nieces and nephews. So you see I'm also known as "cool Aunt Z." because they come and spend time with us over the holidays, and have a great time, and for the most part are always well behaved. But... ooooh here is when it get's good. After all is said and done, I pack them up and send them home! Tee hee!

So, right now I'm gleefully repaying my brothers for all of their years of torture of being the only girl in the family for quite a few years!

Also don't forget, our youngest is nine, so the terrible teens have not happened yet. Although, I will say the older kids when they were teenagers really were not much trouble. I was also blessed in the fact as I mentioned before that their natural parents and I had an agreement that if there was ever a time when they needed any kind of discipline, guidance, whatever; and it came from me, they would back me to the hilt.

I have never felt sorry for myself about not being able to have kids. One of the things that the counselor had put in her report was that since I was one of the older kids in a family of eleven, her words were "she grew up with a baby on her hip" - so I have often wonder if that in some way helped.

But, there WAS one time, and this was the night before my hysterectomy, we were watching Dateline. They were profiling this woman, who was on welfare, public housing, you name it. She flat out said on camera she did NOT want to work. She was pregnant, with her NINTH child. All of the children had different fathers, none had contact with their fathers, and each and every one of these beautiful children had been born addicted to something. She has custody of them all now. The super sad thing? Here she is on camera, so I'm hoping she was acting her best, but she was just yelling and screaming at her kids. They were afraid of her, and poor things were all dealing with so many problems.

I have never felt "oh, it's just not fair" - because I believe that not everyone HAS to be a parent you know? But, it just seems like the folks that really want them, and would love the blessing to be a parent, they can't. Then there are these types of folks.

Also, Arwen, I agree with you on one of your other posts that by the time they are 13, the foundation has been laid. Now when my first husband and I married (he was quite a bit older than me), his kids were around that age, actually two were a little over that age. But, both parents had done a great job, and despite their maritial problems, they kept them just that THEIRS. They did not get the kids in the middle. Also, I remember being punished as a kid, but really not much over the age of 13. Why? Mostly because I was a fairly good kid, but I also knew right from wrong in a very big way, and I knew what the reprecussions would be if I did not follow the rules of the house.

Sorry, got off the topic, but, well you know! Anyway in all cases, Arwen, you yourself seem to be doing a fine job, and you have pretty open communication with your two.

But, thank you both from the bottom of my heart for your kind words.

Love,
Zinnie

August 13, 2003
11:44 pm
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Hi!

You know, Ginger, the reason you can't have kids might be because there are one or two sweet little souls out there who need someone like you! The way Zinnie's 40 some-odd nieces/nephews need her.

I have another sister, okay, keep track if you can...I have 3 older sisters. The oldest, whom you all know too much about, and two others that you should know more about. My second to the oldest sister, she has 5 kids and she is an awesome mother! She was the first of us to have any kids, and we spoiled the hell out of those boys, especially the first born. So, when me and my other sister, the one just older than me, start popping out the rugrats, my second to oldest sister does what she does--which is to buy the kind of toys that kids love!!! Shit like little pianos, drums, plastic baseball bats, play-dough, yeah, PLAY-DOUGH!!! Okay--I gotta have a soap box moment--Who in the hell is the rat fuck that thought up fucking PLAY-DOUGH? They eat it. It dries out and they cry. It gets ground into the carpet and it solidifies like concrete! It goes up their noses, down the bathroom sink drain, in the sofa cushions. If I ever find out who invented play-dough, I might have to take donations and put a contract out on that dude. It HAD to be a MAN! No woman who has to clean up after her damn kids would invent such a stupid ass thing!!! Amen!

As I was saying, this second sister, she is the most patient person in the world. Her kids would be running around, jumping, screaming, banging on all those loud toys we gave them, and she just stayed calm. Or, maybe she stayed calm because she knew that one day, she would be buying that kind of stuff for our kids. Who knows...

Anyway, these two sisters of mine, they are like my shining stars. They never ever let me down. Always there when I need them. And, I can trust them, which is indeed cool when you thing about the rumor mill that goes on in my family!

There are reasons for everything, if we just look hard enough, or have faith and let time pass so we can use that 20/20 hind-sight...

Love,

Arwen

August 14, 2003
3:47 pm
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Hello all,

His mother called and left me a message "oh, he is so depressed that you are doing this to him. When are you coming out to help us? We cannot do this without you, and he needs to get a new trial. I'm so worried, he is going to commit suicide."

I erased it.

Zinnie

August 16, 2003
1:05 am
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OH darn....and we would sooo miss him if he did!

August 16, 2003
3:17 pm
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It would suck for him if he suicides because in my personal belief system, he just has to come back and start all over again...

This shit about "what you are doing to him", Zinnie...that pisses me off. Who the hell does this woman think she is? What the hell did she do to him, through action or inaction to help him become suicidal? I would love a chance to ask her this question, and a few others!

Just because someone puts a plate full of shit salad in front of you doesn't mean you have to eat it, Zinnnie.

Hang tough!

Love,

Arwen

August 18, 2003
8:00 am
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Hi All,

Just back from Vancouver, where we watched oldest son (sigh) marry. Such a beautiful couple. I wish we could post pictures! I have never seen a bride look more radiant, or a man (yes, I have to say he is...) look so happy. We even got a most excellent shot of them running down the beach, and he is literally leaping through the air with her!

But, now I am home.

But, to a lesson that sometimes, just sometimes, our systems works. He has now been transferred to a SuperMax prison because of his "activities" - of course his Mom called, and everyone SIT DOWN, I don't want to be the cause of a thread here "Zinnie made me break my back or neck falling" - anyway, she wanted my husband to call a friend of ours who is a Federal Judge, and have him moved back.

Don't ya' just love it?

Love to all,
Zinnie

August 18, 2003
8:04 pm
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Hi All,

OMG, OMG, OMG! Checked my mail today, and there was a letter from him to the baby. She has since gone home to Canada.

BUT! He tells her "don't believe all the lies that people might tell you about me."

He then asks her if he can call her "Little Angel" and also "Peanut" - then he says "I know you let S. (my husband) call you "Peanut" because she is so petite.

What the hell?????? This man is sicker than I ever thought. I mean he has been moved to a Super Max prison because of this stuff, and he is still sick enough to do this?

I'm sick.

Z.

August 18, 2003
9:14 pm
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What a complete and total jerk this man is Zinnie. I am so glad that you have cut your contacts with him. He is a sick sick man and it is good that he has been moved to supermax prison. For a grown man to write to a child in the first place lets you know something is wrong but would he not think that you might open this letter and see what he had to say in it? This letter should only add fuel to the fire to keep him locked up for as long as possible. Stay strong and don't let him get to you.

August 18, 2003
9:24 pm
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Too Scared,

EXACTLY! I mean my husband will sign the cards and such that we send out to our little one, and to our God-Children. I know with one of our Godson's they exchange e-mails alot. But, he KNOWS these kids, and has a relationship with them.

This man had never even met her. And, then to ask if he could call her "Little Angel" or "Peanut"

Something my husband said made my skin crawl too when I told him about this today. He said that he got angry the first time my cousin started writing to me as "Angel" - he said, that he thought he might just be over reacting, so he let it go. But, he said he had this weird feeling that calling people "Angel" is what he calls the people, be it young girls, women, whomever.

He said that he let it go because he thought I would think he was over reacting to the situation. I told him "hey, I respect your opinion, you should have told me back then."

What about the part "don't believe the lies you might hear about me?" This is a nine year old child! We would not tell her anything about this man, except to stay away, and we would keep her from him. This right there tells me he is trying to set up the situation. Or at least to my way of thinking.

Thoughts?

Love,
Zinnie

August 18, 2003
9:36 pm
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It does seem like this man uses the nickname Angel to gain a closer or more intimate feeling with the woman or girl he is writing. That is very creepy to me. I am so glad that you and your husband are in agreement over this. And you are also right to be upset with him trying to tell a 9 year old child to not believe what her parents are telling her. Why does he feel this need to be close to a child like this and want to gain her trust? His intentions are pure evil and he is a sick man. He doesn't have any other address for her does he? Hopefully she will be shielded from all his ploys to contact her.

Love,TS

August 18, 2003
9:43 pm
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I think your skin needs to crawl about this!! This man is a SICKO! And he's extremely dangerous. I'd be feeding all these kinds of things straight to the authorities, ever last one of them. AND, I'd get a P.O. box and have all your mail sent there. I mean it, all contact via the mail needs to be kept from these kids and if they get home or in the mail before you do - it's going to get to them sooner or later. So just cut that one right off. I'd do that tommorrow, Zinnie. Cut him off at all passes.

The thing is.......he did this for two reasons, to get at her if she happened to get to the mail before you did OR to get to you because he knew you'd open it. At any rate, two can play this little game. Write all the shit you want to you bastard because each and every letter goes from me to the authorities with a message in it from me like.......he doesn't even know this child!! He's just doing his perverted crap once again!

So okay, you want to mail me stuff? FINE. I'll use it against you, keep those cards and letters coming you asshole!

And everytime something comes up for him - that will all be there to stare him right in the face going - SEE, I'm up to my old tricks, aren't I? He can be his own worst enemy so use it on him.

The other thing Zinnie.......and I hate like hell to even say this to you but.......in prison, with people like this, they have all day to do plots and schemes in their head and it would really bother me that this man knows where you live, and about your children. He may be locked up, but whoever is getting out from in there, or whoever he knows and has contacts with - can still get to you and your family.... That would really bother me and it should.

But you don't have any children at home now, right? Or do you? I'm confused here. The baby went back home and was only there for a visit, right? If you do have other kids at home, I'd be real worried here and would think about moving and leaving no forwarding address.

These people are just twisted and you have to get into their heads a little bit to really know - what they might do next. It's a horrible journey to even do that, but you have to to some extent in order to be safe.

August 18, 2003
11:03 pm
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Ladeska,

Yes, our kids are actually my step-children from my first marriage, their father passed away many years ago. We still keep in contact. Their natural mother had a little girl nine years ago as a result of a relationship (the guy was a total creep and left), but we just consider her another part of the family. Her Mom was having some family problems and had to deal with them, so we offered to take the little one for the summer, which is why she was here. Hope that helps to clarify.

Actually, we have talked about doing that very thing. We are looking to move sometime in the next year to 18 months. I told my husband at that time, we would just get a P.O. box should there be any further contact, which I'm trying to stop.

Something else that get's me, just shows how selfish and self centered this man is. Here he is, he has been in jail for over two years. During the first two years, I wrote him every single day. Even if it was just a post card that said "hey, I'm busy, but just thinking about you." Then came the trial, I made sure he had five suits to wear, and a friend and I drove out there for ten days for the trial, and stayed. Also, during all of the time he was in jail, we spent numerous hours researching information for him, etc., and sending money to his commissary account. Not including taking over his personal business. Which includes paying property taxes, credit card bill, and untangeling a 15 year old IRS mess he was in. Then, even after trial, until he really flipped out I still supported him. I had really mixed feelings about going to the sentencing for lots of reasons, mostly because I was finally figuring him out. During all of this time, I think I got a total of five or six letters. But, I sure as hell got the phone calls... remember $1300.00 a month in collect calls!

Anyway, the point I'm building to, and I'm so sorry to be so long winded, but I need to get all of this off of my chest. I talked to his case worker from the jail, as she and I have become friends, and I had called to see if she had gotten the promotion she was hoping for - she did! Here he is writing to all of these inmates back there in county lock up, but he can only write to me to say "well, what's wrong, I can't get through on the phone." I mean, not that I want to hear from him, remember I sent his letters back. But still... am I making sense here?

In any case, by turning him into the CPS in the area, he was moved into a Super Max, and given another six months. Yet, he is still sick enough to write to a child. He does not know she is back in Montreal, and no he does not have those addresses, and he never will. They are also unlisted, so I don't have to worry about that.

Ladeska, yes, I have worried about him pulling something like that, as I agree with you. He has the next six to eight years to do nothing but think of all the people that "have done him wrong." I'm lucky there... he would have to deal with my husband. I know we are supposed to remain anon. here, and you know my husband has a law degree, although not in criminal law. His other talent, he was a sharp shooter for the military, and now he aides in training SWAT teams around the country. Think it still might be a problem?

But, thank you for your concern, touched me to my very bones... I'm glad I have found a safe place to vent and get good ideas on how to handle this SOB.

But, now as you are reading this, you see why I still feel like I'm dealing with "The Biggest Mistake of My Life"

Love to all,
Zinnie

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