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BIG challenging question..
November 9, 2004
10:51 pm
on my way
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Forum Posts: -1
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September 29, 2010
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Do you believe that EVERYONE has some co dependent traits? I really would like to hear some thoughts about the following, and it is only from my observations of reading the threads. Not judgements, just want to run this by all of you. Whenever I read that someone is sad over a break-up, or someone is having a hard time letting go, or someone is having difficulty with not be able to stop thinking about this special person, we almost always refer them to a "co-dependent" book or "something is wrong with you book, and this can fix it." I know tha teveryone has great insight, and I have learned much. BUT...it is healthy to mourn the loss of a relationship, and it takes soem longer than others, and if we find someone we really like, do you seriously kbow anyone who does not think about that person alot? It is new, exciting, scary, wonderful, and it makes a difference. So why is this labeled 'obsessing". Just because we are on a co-dependent web site, which all of us looked for, or found by luck, does not mean we are not normal. Does this make sense? Someone might have just met a very nice person, and they are so excited, cannot stop thinking about them, normal...and they end up thinking they are co-dependent? What doe you think?

November 10, 2004
12:59 am
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Forum Posts: -1
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September 29, 2010
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Well everyone feels differently about the subject, for example, my therapist doesn't like to use the term codependent because she says everyone is different. I think that here we notice similar traits that seem to fall under the "codependency" label. Traits from our early family life, traits in our dealings with relationships. I believe the problems come in when we go back to people or situations time and time again that are bad for us. On some level we know it's not right, and we deserve better, but we have a compulsion to return for whatever reason. Again, I think everyone's different, but it sure seems like so many of us on here share very similar experiences, whatever the label may be.

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