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BIG BAD WOLF
November 26, 2001
2:17 am
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gypsygirl
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I have a question about receiving benefits from the government for being mentally Ill I am doing research for my paper and I came across a message from the attorney general about mental health. If "mental disorders are the leading cause of disability for persons 5 and older" Then why dont we recieve some sort of compensation for it? I pay out my ass for my meds and I dont go to the Dr. when I should because I cannot afford it. Why must we suffer because of this damn illness? It is hard to get SSI because M.D. are hard to prove. I have months worth of unpaid bills becuase I need to pay for my meds. I already get a discount on them and I still cant afford them. I am falling behind in school because I cant bring myself to write a damn paper about stupid shit. I am flunking math because I have anxiety that prevents me from going to class and asking for help. I have trouble with co-workers because of my mood swings.Why must we also suffer because the GD government dosent give a shit? Does anyone know of anyone that gets SSI for depression?

Sorry I needed to rant about this topic.My son used to get SSI untill they decided he wasnt disabled anymore. Stupid fucks dont understand shit.

November 26, 2001
3:26 am
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gypsygirl
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My apologies for the abusive language.

November 26, 2001
10:28 am
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damaged
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gypsygirl don't apologies on my account. I think it's good to vent whats on your mind. I don't know much about this topic, but I never thought the Government was to stable. Keep going to counseling and keep talking to us and guess what the GD government really don't give a shit it you do are not. They are more worry about their damn little war right now. I look up to people that are trying to make something of there life and not just sitting at home playing the victim. Keep up the good work gypsygirl!!!

November 26, 2001
10:43 am
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deshong
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gypsygirl,

I would suggest that you try contacting a or getting a social worker. They usually have alot of knowledge of resources to help you.

November 26, 2001
11:29 am
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gypsygirl
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DOWNWARD SPIRAL:

And to top it all off I got a fucking trafic ticket this morning for expired registration and no insurance card with me. Fucking little bald headed cocky ass cop is gonna get the last fucking laugh alright.

My son is sick with an ear infection and I am still behing in English and math and I had to cancel my damn counceling appt today so I can go to work instead. Now I have to wait for over a week. I am fucking loosing it here.

I cant even pay my rent this month let alone a stupid traffic ticket. and christmas??? forget it.

November 26, 2001
3:39 pm
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Starbaby
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Gyspygirl

I don't know where you live, but what are your county's resources like? Most places have emergency funds that you may be able to access. I was able to get help before. I went to the Dept of Social Services and applied for emergency assistance. I had to bring proof of income and explain why I couldn't pay rent and bring supporting documentation of that. For you, that may be doctor's notes, etc.
They were able to pay the full month's rent for me, but you have to be w/in their income limits. I suggest that you make some phone calls and see what is available to you.

As for getting SSI for depression, it is possible, but is very difficult. I work as a case manager and help people with this. Everyone pretty much gets denied on the first round, so if you try it, don't let that discourage you. In the case of depression, you need a lot of proof from doctors, etc that you are severly disabled by it and cannot work as a result of having it. The more evidence you have, the better.

If you can get a DR. to declare you disabled for a year, then you can apply for medical assistance and that would pay for your RX bills.

Get linked up with a social worker through your county. The "system" is a pain to navigate and it helps to have someone who knows it to guide you. Good luck!

November 27, 2001
12:22 am
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gypsygirl
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And just when you think that the hole your in cant get any deeper, someone throws you a shovel.

My sons grandmother from texas called while I was at work and left a message saying that she needed to talk to me about George, My son's dad. I dont have long distance and my calling card is out of minutes so I called my mom so she could call over there and have her call me back. Well A few minutes later, my mom calls back saying that my son's grandpa answered and that Janie was at work already and that she would call me tomorrow but he did tell my mom that George is in jail. AND I AM SUPPOSTED TO WAIT UNTILL TOMORROW TO FIND OUT WHY? I am so worried. I have a bad feeling about this. I know this man and what he is capable of. He has a new baby there in texas. I hope nothing happened to her or the mother.My BF says not to worry that he just proabably messed up with drugs or alcohol again and that is all, but I am afraid it is more than that. How am I going to tell my son that his father is in prision again? I did not even want to tell him the last time my mother took the liberty of telling him no your daddy is not gone working he is in jail. He was about three at the time and had a fit because "jail is where bad people go."
How do they expect me to stay sane tonight wondering what might have happened? And Don usually tells me stuff cause were cool like that we have deep conversations when I see him. I do not understand why he couldnt call me instead of making me wait till tomorrow when I might not even be home in the first place cause I have to work and stand in line at the DMV to get my registration renewed so I will not get another ticket. If this is the gods idea of a practical joke I am not laughing. My whole entire day has been shitty. I was an hour late to work cause I took my son to the Dr. and He has TWO ear infections. Poor baby did not even want a sticker from the doc and he always asks for two. He has a fever too. I am so full af rage right now and no man slave here to whip till I feel better. LOL

November 27, 2001
1:57 pm
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artist
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OK, Starbaby, Blondie and deshong have good advice, get all doctor's reports in writing, all rent receipts,
everything you spend should be documented as well as your med receipts and the baby's doctors reports and meds as well--and--make copies for the people you deal with--social workers,etc.--AND you keep the originals--don't let any of that go.
NOW, sit and take a deep breathe.

About your son's father--other than being the father of your son--how does he fit in your life--he's an ex, right? Why is it so important to know what he is in jail for--does he pay you support? How close are you to his parents and if you aren't close what on the world possessed them to call you and spread the bad news--to upset you or did they think there was some way that you might be able to get their son out of jail?
Don't tell your son anything about his father being in jail--if he is in jail for a short time--the situation will be over before you need to say anything to your son. If it's a potential prison sentence, then put off telling your son for as long as possible. In either case, unless you have the extra cash--which I doubt from what you've written--there isn't much you could do to help you son's father even if you did know the details. I'm guessing that the tie here is emotional and I'm sorry that you feel so bad about your ex being in jail which has me wondering now if he is your ex at all(?) Well, so much for trying to be helpful with very little information.

If you are too angry to think about all this, I'll understand. Good venting, though.
We are all here for you--so vent away--anytime.
Artist:)

November 27, 2001
5:56 pm
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gypsygirl
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It is not that I care that he is in jail it is what I feared that he did. I have no intentions of trying to get him out nor do his parents. I just found out that his new baby has shaken baby syndrome and that is why he is in jail. I had the worst feeling last night that something might have happened to the baby and I prayed that I was wrong. But my fight is now to get that baby and raise her with her brother, my son. She might not be my daughter, but she will always be a part of my family because she is my sons sister. She is in foster care right now.

November 28, 2001
8:37 am
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artist
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Oh, boy are you AMAZING--and strong!!
What about the mother of the new baby?
Where is she? I hope that you aren't letting yourself in for more than you can handle. You seem to have a pretty full plate as it is.
Hey, whatever you choose to do--pray about --ask to be shown what is right to do--and the answer will come. Maybe you won't like the answer but
you will know when it's the correct one--you'll feel it.
I'm not all that great at the praying thing but I just sent one up for you--I guess practice makes perfect.
So, hang tough, gypsygirl--the home team is counting on you.
Artist

November 28, 2001
3:03 pm
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gypsygirl
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Ok, Now that I have a few minutes I can elaborate a bit more.

The mother of the baby has an older child that had been taken away by child protective services, before this baby was born. I met her (the mother) when I took my son for a visit. My impression of her was that she was a bitch. uneducated imature attention seening coldhearted girl. She was still pregnant at the time. she had not been getting regular prenatal care. she did not even know how far along she was.

I am still on some level connected with my ex. in a strange sort of twisted way I think of him, and my love for him is that of a sibling or like you love your best friend. it is compassionate.I had two children with him and had connected early on in an emotional way more than a sexual way. After our second son died we had a really rocky end to our relationship. Since, we have learned to be friends, distant friends. He spent some time in jail because of alcohol and stupid decisions on his part. He became more calm while he was there and had learned some of lifes lessions. After he got out he went to Texas to stay with his parents and get his life on track. He stayed away from the drugs and alcohol and got mixed up with this girl. Well 1+1=3 and along came the baby. My son stayed in Texas for a few months this year while I was doung the Army thing. He stayed with his grandparents and his dad stayed there also. He is good with my son now that my son is older. He has no common sense when it comes to taking care of babies, He had never hurt our son, he just is pretty much clueless in that department.

Anyway, the incident happened with the baby around the first part of novemer. the baby spent two weeks in the hospital and almost died. The mother was given two lie detector tests and failed them both. She admitted to having shaken the baby in the past but not that day. George was given a lie dector test and passed it and they were going to give him a second one when he changed his story and said that he had done it. So now he is in jail facing a possible twenty year sectance and she is free I guess. The baby is in the foster care My sons grandparents cannot take her cause of health reasons and the mothers parents? I dont know. I am hoping that since my son is her half brother therefor making her family that even though I dont live in Texas that if in any way possible I want custody of her. I have no problems raising a special needs child I have done it with my son. That is what god put me on this planet to do. wheather it be my own children or not.The school thing can wait. I have this strong feeling that I had done it(school) in a past life and that this life is dedicated to putting that knowledge to work in helping these children. I get great joy out of being a care giver to them. If it is gods will then let it be done.

November 29, 2001
8:48 pm
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gypsygirl
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Made contact..... looks good.

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