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Believe In You
September 30, 2000
12:26 pm
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Jaskid
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September 30, 2010
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guest,

Counselling is a great idea...I did go to see a counselor for awhile and I loved her, then my husband lost his job and we could not afford it. But we have insurance now and I really think that going back to her will help me tremendously. My sister and I did grow up in a very disfunctional environment all our lives. My father did physically abuse my sister, but not me, I was the baby. My mom divorced when I was 4 and remarried. My stepfather was a beautiful man but him and my mother fought constantly...he had 2 selfish boys that wanted his constant attention. Anyway, I see what you are saying how much our mind can be affected by past experiences and I agree...I really don't think it is a battle that medications or counselling can win by themselves.....Ultimately with God's Grace, he gives us the strength that we need to get through this life...How much does he give to some and not others, I don't have that answer, but I do know that there definitely has been a force in my life to keep pushing me to be the best person I can be and want to be.
This life has a long road and there are going to be constant battles we have to fight....and I feel with help and Faith we can do it.

:)Jaskid

October 1, 2000
1:08 am
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jaskid, i had a religion before that put very strong emphasis on god (as do most religions). but i left my religion, and i'm not coming back! cause it put so many restrictions on me. and now i cannot and will not accept the fact that someone else can command me and tell me what to do in life and if i didnt do those things, i would go to hell. so i've left that religion now. with it was associated the concept of god and thus i cant even accept god now. i know i have a lot fo cover on the mental grounds. ahhhh. atleast i'm a free man. there's only one thing that isnt freeing me, thats my past. due to it i have stupid fears in me, fear of people. if i can free myself from the past i'll be totally a free man, and then probably the person i want to be, free and happy.

October 1, 2000
9:31 pm
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dudet
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September 27, 2010
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Molly, you are an inspiration but how do you believe in yourself. How can I believe in myself- I don't enderstand. I can't explain but I need help with that. What helped you to believe in youself. What did you do to keep yourself happy and not depressed? How did you do it? Please help.

October 2, 2000
11:25 am
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Jaskid
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guest,

Is being a free-man now worth your soul in the end? I do not want to force my beliefs on you...but whether you accept it or not there is a force controlling things, and we may all think that somehow we are in control of our own lives, but ultimately we are not in control...death is....Is there life after death, if there isn't then nothing will really matter...We won't know anything beyond....But if there is a God and He does have us answer to Him for the things we've done on this earth...Then what? Do you think God will give us another chance? We will either spend eternity with Him, or without. I think religions make things too complicated....God is simple...and I think He has a plan that we can either accept or reject.
I don't want this to turn into a debate....Just take in what I have said or throw it out...I know we both have different views and I am just expressing mine. Yours are what are important to you, and no one can change them or feel something different but you alone.

Jaskid

October 2, 2000
1:24 pm
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Brenda
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Guest, you can be spiritual and divinely loved and guided without belonging to any religion, if the religion teaches you to fear god and that you are a sinner, well this is fear based and controlling. God is not this way, god is within all of us and even you.
YOu have had a very negative experience with religion, but you have obviously not touched the positive experience of GOD yet.
Blessings

October 2, 2000
6:16 pm
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Molly
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Dudet, it takes work, and lots and lots of work, you pull your self up when your down, because who cares? I could do this or that in a destructive way to my self and who cares? The bottom line is that I care, I know that it is possible to create, hard but possible, I get up I make a mistake, and I get up again and do it different. It does not serve me to stay stuck for to long. I give my self permission to fail,because if I try I am alive, and failure is not the worst thing in the world, as long as I try again. I own up to my humaness, and know that being alive allows me to do different. I try to be a good person, and we all know what that is, simply not trying to hurt intentionally, I try to accept , not that I don't have my own value system for judgement. For a long time the only thing that kept me going was my kids, then they grew up, then I realized that it was my parents that fueled me, then they passed away, I put my efforts into being the perfect wife, and citizen, and who cared???? So I realized that it was my agenda, my knowledge based on a few compliments that I have gotten out of life, and some spiritual stuff, that said we are all a miracle, and owned that I too am a miracle when I choose to be one, or I can choose different, who cares? It all depends on what you want, and if you want to put the energy out there, you know you have it in you to be who you want, do what you want, and have what you want, its all math,energy, and energy creates energy. Ugh, I forgot to mention patience which was a birth defect of mine, but I am learning that some things take time,and committment. All we have is our integrity, and it starts with how we honor our own committment, values, and goals. I have made some mistakes, owned them, and that is why I am where I am at, now if I just lay down and accept them I might as well be dead, and that sometimes sounds good, but I am not dead, and I belive in karma, so I don't want to do this again, so I must believe in me, or die. Where is the choice????? Feel the fear and do it any way, what do you have to loose, pride, and what's pride with out some effort????

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