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Are You Too Nice? A Pop Quiz
December 27, 2005
4:32 pm
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bonita1
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Answer these questions with a Yes or a No. If you anwered yes to five or more of these ten questions, you are giving far more than you are receiving.

1. Do you feel guilty when you say no, or do you say no and then second-guess yourself?

December 27, 2005
4:33 pm
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bonita1
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2. Do you often try to tell your partner that you want to be treated with respect?

December 27, 2005
4:33 pm
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dalpuz
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yes

December 27, 2005
4:34 pm
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dalpuz
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yes

December 27, 2005
4:36 pm
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dalpuz
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keep going, you've peaked my interest. The leash is off the dog, so hurry.

December 27, 2005
4:36 pm
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bonita1
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3. Do you find yourself bartering or negotiating for what you want or need?

December 27, 2005
4:36 pm
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dalpuz
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3. yes

December 27, 2005
4:38 pm
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bonita1
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4. Do you often pass up sleep or the need for personal time to meet his needs?

5. Do you regularly see him on short notice or when it is convenient for him?

6. Do you find that you repeat what you've asked for as though he didn't hear it the first time?

December 27, 2005
4:40 pm
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goodenough
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I am totally there...:(
Is there an end to it?

December 27, 2005
4:40 pm
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dalpuz
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4. yes

5. yes

6. yes

I'm wonder if this means i'm dealing with a person with a problem or developing a problem dealing with this person.

December 27, 2005
4:43 pm
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snowlover
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Ive taken this test. I say yes to all 10. Im a doormat. Geez I need a class on becoming a bitch!!!!

December 27, 2005
4:44 pm
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dalpuz
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lol

December 27, 2005
4:47 pm
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bonita1
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7. After a fight, are you always the first one to contact him or apologize?

8. Do you find you are much more doting and affectionate than he is?

9. Do you often feel depleted after he has been with you?

10. Do you constantly want more attention or reassurance?

December 27, 2005
4:49 pm
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dalpuz
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7. her...yes

8. yes

9. ya

10. yup

December 27, 2005
4:50 pm
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bonita1
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Lets explore why giving yourself up is never in your best interests.

Women understand the concept of balance between work and play. They balance time with family and time with friends.

They balance a job with getting an education. But when it comes to a man, the nice girl abandons all sense of balance and immediately makes the man the whole pie. But with a bitch, he is just a piece of it. She keeps the other pieces intact.

December 27, 2005
4:53 pm
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bonita1
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It all starts out subtly. "What are you doing right now?" he asks when he calls her from his cell phone. "Well, I was going to catch a movie with a girlfriend," she answers. The operative word is was (past tense). Then he asks, "Want to hook up?" She pauses for two seconds, "Okay."

December 27, 2005
4:54 pm
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dalpuz
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hmmmmm..........go on

December 27, 2005
4:55 pm
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dalpuz
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Rolls reversed...yes

December 27, 2005
5:00 pm
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bonita1
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A man will try to get you to be very accessible because it's natural that he'll want to make things more convenient for himself. And he'll do so by saying the following to pressure you to accommodate him:

"I don't like to plan things."

"I like to be spontaneous."

"I like to fly by the seat of my pants."

Another key factor that distinguishes the nice girl from the bitch is how much of herself she'll give up. Once you're in a relationship and he's shown a parretn of being interested over time, then it's okay to be a little more spontaneous.

In the beginning, however, don't make yourself so accessible. If you do, the relationship will always be on his terms.

December 27, 2005
5:02 pm
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snowlover
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This really is a great book. Ive read it several times. Too bad I cant put into practice. its really easy to read and very insightful.

December 27, 2005
5:04 pm
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bonita1
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Yes, it is a great book, snow. Why haven't you been able to put it into practice. What has been stopping you??

December 27, 2005
5:08 pm
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snowlover
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I dont know. maybe thats what Im trying to do now? I know he doesnt like the way Ive been the last few weeks. I dont "kiss his ass" anymore, and I always have. Okay..maybe Im not a total doormat anymore, Im working on it.

I just dont like to tick people off is all.

December 27, 2005
5:09 pm
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bonita1
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The nice girl will often cancel plans with a girlfriend if she gets a last-minute date. The bitch will hold her own simply by keeping her priviously set plans. I know one bitchy woman whose partner absolutely adores her. If she's painting her toenails when he calls, she'll still say, "Thank you so much, but I'm a little busy right now."

Sometimes a man will get tickets to something at the last minute. Or he'll plan a romantic surprise. He is spontaneous, but clearly you're his first priority- so this is harmless. You're in good shape if he's calling you all the time and wants to see a lot of you.

What you want to guard against is going on last-minute dates or getting those last-minute calls to do something because he didn't have anything better planned. Sometimes when a woman has feelings for a man, she can't distinguish between the two.

December 27, 2005
5:10 pm
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feline
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7 out of 10 - big doormat

December 27, 2005
5:13 pm
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bonita1
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You don't like to tick people off because you are a people pleaser and their opinion is important to you??

Snow, thats the nice girl talking. What would the bitch care about?? What she thinks about herself or what others think?

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