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Anyone working on the 12 Steps?
October 31, 2005
1:39 pm
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caraway
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Just curious if there was anyone out there who has worked the 12 Steps and if they found it helpful. I am about to begin, really already have since I have admitted that I was powerless and turned things over to my Higher Power.

Cary

October 31, 2005
1:48 pm
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Anonymous
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I am, I am, I am.

I haven't even begun to scratch the surface, but my life has improved ten-fold already.

I have admitted I am powerless.

I have turned my will over - well, let's see, I think I have - I think I am still selective - so I am working on this each day.

I have already started taking an inventory and making amends...but this will be a long slow process.

But, I jump to the end and when I see I screwed up, I make amends immediately - instead of waiting until later.

It is VERY refreshing to give up control - I still have "some" control issues - but not like I used to - my obsessive thinking has almost gone away - the only time it kicks in is in high stress situations - not daily like it used to - and even during high stress, I am able to "tame it" more than I ever could...I am happier and more free and more relaxed...and I have HOPE!!!!!!

good luck on your journey.

November 1, 2005
2:28 am
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Lass
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Oh yeah! Thanks for reminding me! (Duh!)

LL

November 1, 2005
11:53 am
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mj
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I'm working the Steps Daily and They are very Worthwhile on a daily basis.
I hope you enjoy the serenity that it brings!

November 1, 2005
12:12 pm
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jastypes
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i am working a 12-step program for my food addiction and co-dependency. I'm still in my 4th step, and hating it.
jill

November 1, 2005
12:14 pm
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mj
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Hi Jastypes,
I use to hate working the 4th step till I realized it was just an accounting of myself to get an accurate picture of reality. It contains both the positive traits and the negative. When I realized that I would not loss anything by doing it I am able to be honest and fearless!
Good luck to you.

November 1, 2005
12:23 pm
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Anonymous
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Jas - remember when taking the inventory - to remember the good, as well as the bad - no matter how small - you need to keep a perspective.

It sucks to find out we have so many "defects" but it's totally refreshing to know that this program will help remove them and restore us to sanity.

I haven't truly done a complete 4th step - on some level I did before coming to coda - which is how I figured I needed it. instead, I take a daily inventory - that way I can change things as I see them. And fix them as I see them. Cuz going to coda was the huge thing that changed ALOT of bad habits, just by going and making the decision to turn my will over - and it has removed the obsessions and control issues....so no need to inventory them.

November 1, 2005
12:47 pm
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kathygy
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I have worked all of the steps time and time again. However, it is important for me to re-word the steps that make them more helpful to me. I find the first and third step bring me a great sense of relief. But when I use the first step I always separate out what I have control over and what I don't. I don't assume I have no control over everything. I do have control over me and my reactions and choices. But I have no control over how someone may react to something I've sad or done. I don't have control over other people. I can influence other people by the way I say things or things that I do but ultimately it is their choice how they will respond to me.

I imagine I work the 12 steps everyday all day long but as I said re-worded to fit my therapy and ways that are most helpful to me.

November 1, 2005
12:55 pm
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kathygy
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I never use the terms 'defects of character' for myself because I feel that my character is on very high ground. However, I have old survival skills that I used as a child that no longer serve my purpose, that may push other people away. I need to work on letting those go. I think of a defect of character as something like cheating and lying which I don't do. I also feel it is very important that I not judge myself for behaviors that do not serve me. I need to feel compassion for my inner child who created certain behaviors out of childhood wounds. I work on healing those wounds. One thing that I've had to let go of was being manipulative to get my way. That doesn't make me a bad person. But as a child it is what I learned. Today I am more direct. If I want something I ask for it.

I could go on and on about he 12 steps but this is getting long enough.

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