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any advice for relaxation?
May 24, 2007
4:01 pm
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Pom 34
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I have been told by many people for years that I just need to relax. It used to make me angry, but then I simply agreed, but took no action. Now, my therapist, who thank the gods is a strong headed woman, has mentioned that although I am enthusiastic about the dawn of my recovery from codependency, she has now said YOU REALLY NEED TO RELAX! 🙂 I don't know how to. I really, truly, have no idea. If at various times throughout the day tune in to my body, I find it always clenched and tensing up somewhere. Nice I can at least identify that now, but I am not sure how to prevent it. And my restless mind? Whew, I have no idea for that one...

So... what do you guys do? Did any of you have to learn how to relax?

Thanks so much, Pom 34

May 24, 2007
4:09 pm
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At_it_Again
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Pom,

I am the same way. I always have a lot of tension on my neck and traps, not to mention I work at a computer all day. What I've heard that helps is stretching, deep breathing, visualization, exercise, working in the yard (that helps me), massage and acupuncture. I went and had acupuncture today for the first time and some of it hurt a little but after a couple of minutes I relaxed and almost fell asleep a couple of times. It was very relaxing.

Now I just need to get better at stretching on a daily basis.

I think most of it is probably mental/emotional. If you are stressed over a guy which I have been a lot lately, then you automatically tense up! So I'm working on ways to Let that go!

Hope that helps.

May 24, 2007
4:11 pm
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lovinglife
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well, listening to music always works for me...esp classical music when I'm really looking to relax my mind.

May 24, 2007
4:29 pm
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fantas
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Pom, I am learning how to relax as well. I enjoy salsa dancing and that feels good for me. I also enjoy baths, I like classical and reggae music. The newest thing for me is listening to and concentrating on my breaths before I go to sleep and anytime I remember. This really calms me down. Find things that you really enjoy to do and start slow:)

May 24, 2007
4:44 pm
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Pom 34
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Hey! Yeah! I remember music! I am a music freak... with life going on around me I had forgotten how much of a comfort music was to me. I was raised by crazy hippie musicians...

Thanks!

May 24, 2007
4:51 pm
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loverbee
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I always listen to enya and do breathing when I am really stressed out.

May 24, 2007
8:30 pm
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Rasputin
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Today during my lunch break...I sat in the sun and I felt so relaxed and sleepy. A good free way to enjoy the day, Pom!

May 24, 2007
8:39 pm
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lonely and addicted
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I have been told that for yesrs "RELAX" and I always wondered how also. I have high anxiety to begin with and am on medicine for it so that helps "me" a little to be able to look at relaxing.

My mind usually runs at 500mph and in order for me to slow down I had to take a hard look at the caos in my life, that was part of my problem. For awhile I just had to totally shut down to get myself to relax a little. Is caos heavy in your life? Just a thought.

May 24, 2007
8:48 pm
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gracenotes
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I started doing yoga again this year. No matter how stressed I feel, once I go to my yoga class, put down the mat, and start breathing and doing the poses, I feel better and relaxed. I miss it now when I do not do it.

I also remember to consciously take a deep breath when I find myself not breathing fully. Not only am I more relaxed, but we just did fitness end-of-semester tests and my body is much stronger than when I began. Exercise, any kind of exercise, even a 20 minute walk outside makes all the difference.

Many of the kids I work with, and these are young kids, often complain about being tired. One kid even said that being tired is why he gets mad so easily. They stay up playing video games, computer stuff. Many of us adults are sleep deprived. So, a good question to ask is: How much sleep did you get last night? And, guess what?? There have been recent studies that have shown that people who don't get at least 7 hours of sleep a night have a really difficult time losing weight!! For me, when I feel wired at night, I drink a cup or two of camomile tea so I can get to sleep easily.

May 24, 2007
9:27 pm
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You may not be able to prevent it ... yet when ever aware that you are clenching or contracting and going inward ... just let go. Relax your hands, take a deep breath, laugh at yourself for doing it once again, visualize something beautiful or relaxing to you (like a certain flower, a sunset or sunrise, a magnificent tree, or whatever. And once again smile at yourself for once again getting up tight. Really and truely just laugh it away.

Meditation was also a liberating tool for me and did set me free. But go easy and with the flow.

littlespirit

May 25, 2007
5:41 am
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power
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Pom

I introduced myself to some Reiki healings, this helps balance the chakras. I'm now going to do a Reiki 1 and 2 course which makes you more intuned with the energy force. Learning about the chakras and what they represent has been useful to me. I also listen to relaxing music which you can buy from New Age Shops, Hypnosis Stress Release tapes are also helpful. Kinesiology can take the negative attachments of areas of your life which are affecting you. I have been through two major depressions and this has been my saviour, also a Hi Potency Vit B is for stress.

Lavendar in a bath a night is relaxing,
and Sandlewood Aromatherapy Oils on the temples. Also burn these oils in a oil burner.

Hope this can help....Relax and breath deep into the gut, image the white light force entering the top of your head going through your body and through the soles of your feet to the earth, this helps with grounding.

TAKE YOUR POWER BACK, DON'T GIVE IT AWAY....

May 25, 2007
7:55 pm
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Pom 34
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Thanks very much all of you.

I do take yoga, but have a problem making it a regular part of my life. I am learning about chakra therapy, but also not on a regular basis.

It's my head, I am quite sure, that needs to learn how to chill out and I think then my body will follow. I'll just have to be patient and RELAX while relaxation starts to come to me naturally. I just want it all NOW!! 🙂 That's really hard for me to believe though, that it will ever come naturally, so I am striving to one day be able to describe myself as "energetic!" instead of "tightly wound"!!! You guys all had great things to say so thanks ever so for being there.

Hugs to all, Pom

May 27, 2007
12:27 am
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lovinglife
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Pom~ regarding your comment "I was raised by crazy hippie musicians..." LOL

... just thinking TODAY while I was listening to "Staying Alive" by The Bee Gees (gosh that sounds so funny) but it dawned on me that my thing with music (and I LOVE all kinds of music from Mozart to rock) was totally influenced by my mother - a 70's disco queen : ) Now that sounds even funnier to say as she is old now and makes me realize how old I am, but its those 70's music memories filling our home in my childhood that were AWESOME a very happy time - and now when I need a stress relief or just a good pick me up - I find it in music-it just does something to me....brings out alot of good feelings and is ultimately very relaxing. And NO I don't always listen to 70's disco -- In fact its just recently I'm going back to the 70's to add to my music collection!!

Hope you find your thing!!

May 27, 2007
12:33 am
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lovinglife
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just remembered to add to my 70's disco music memories regarding my mother - How could I forget about Elvis Presley also be heard in our home!!

May 27, 2007
10:54 am
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bonni
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Pom,
I struggle with this too. I want to echo the yoga and chamomile tea suggestions.

I have a hard time getting the yoga in regularly, even though it makes such a HUGE difference. After several months, I've been able to use the breathing in stressful situations to calm myself. Also some of the poses to stretch me out and bring me to a calmer mental state. Maybe tonight, I'll renew my dedication. My goal is to learn this one tape of morning/evening yoga so I can begin and end each day without the tape with the 20 minute routine.

The tea is great. I use TAZO calm and Trader Joe's good night or something. Also STASH has a good night time tea that's just like the Trader Joes, but more expensive.

I love lavender. We just planted 3 hidcote, 2 provence and 1 munstead varieties. I harvested the hidcote this morning. I'm going to dry it and make sachets.

Finally, my dh and I get monthly massages at a local day spa. Its a HUGE stress reliever. When I walk in the stress starts to fall off me. By the time I drink a glass of water in the lounge, I'm halfway there. DH loves it there too. He's started trying to make our home more spalike. Yesterday we painted our bedroom a color that is nearly the color of the spa interior.

bonni

May 27, 2007
9:49 pm
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arlea
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Hi Pom

This may sound like an oxymoron... and I am not sure what you do... but heck it sounds like you need time to yourself. Go for a run/walk. smell the flowers and tire yourself out. Once a week or two if you can afford it get a message. Try a suntan (I usually fall asleep). Get involved in something that gets you intuned with YOU. I mentioned running... but you can also try martial arts, cycling, swimming...etc. I find physical things if you are able to do them put you in tune with the mental. Enjoy

May 27, 2007
9:54 pm
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soprano2
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One word, Pom--

Lavender

And not the fake perfumy stuff that is sold in most lavender lotions.

Real aromatherapy Lavender.

It will help you relax and help you slow down a bit.

I only use the stuff from The Body Shop, but there are others that are truly pure. Lotion, massage oil, and other products are out there.

Lavander can help with lowering blood pressure, headaches, migranes, depression, anxiety, and tons of other issues.

You just need to make sure that it is the real stuff. I have used it for the last six months, and it has done wonders for me.

May 27, 2007
10:18 pm
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mamacinnamon
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I use a relaxation technique that you tense each part of your body and then let it loose while doing slow breating in the nose and out the mouth as you go. If interested I can post it.

Also, for hyperventilation and not having a bag to breath into... cup your hands over our nose and mouth and don't let any air in. Then breath into you hands.. in slow; out slow and keep doing till your panic resides.

May 28, 2007
4:10 pm
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Anonymous
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I recently adopted a kitty who´s made laugh for the first time in a while!

Also, my friend taught me how to make small, tiny, ikebana flower arrangements. Its so simple and last so long. When you look at nature (some blossoms grow) in your home, yu feel like you are also being taken care of and let go of... contarol? things?

Best and hugs,

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