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AM I OVERREACTING?
January 25, 2005
6:17 pm
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simpson
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I split with my ex 4 years ago and came away from it all. he was an alcholic and violent and got epilepy through drink i was with him from being 16 and he was my first boyfriend we have a son together so i put up with terrible abuse as he would be lovely when not drunk.
i went to different refuges and finally broke away 4 years ago it was really hard but i did it i got a house a new job new school for my son and new friends but could not seem to handle going out with normal men as i felt like i was a bit mad
well in november this year my ex came round to see his son i know it was me he wanted to see he told me he had cleaned up and he looked fine so me being lonely let him in we ended up in bed and it was great as iv been out with other men but god knows why it only seems to feel great with this man who has hurt me so much. i feel so stupid
well we have been trying on and off but he still has a drink and seems drugged up somtimes i just feel like a different person now and he still cannot ever work or drive as he is on sick as alcholic and epileptic he can be lovely and does cleaning cooking and be very loving but inside i dont think iv forgiven the past which was horrendous he keeps saying hes changed but tonight i found drugs in his pocket and told him if he had changed he would throw them away, so he opened my bathroom window and threw them .so i thought! so i went back upstairs and opened window and he had put them on the ledge i really went mad packed his bag and told him it was over for good he said im mad and insane and yes i feel it but deep down i feel i deserve better than this am i being selfish not to let it go or forgive him or am i being a doormat?
i feel the only thing i want him for is sex and affection he even said im using him like a prostitute and yes i feel i am as we dont talk but now im alone i feel lonely again how can this of happened i went all thoses years alone and did it i always had the fear though at the back of my mind if he saw me with another man he would kill them so i stayed alone and focused on my son i feel im going mad?
how do i stop being scared of him?

January 25, 2005
7:41 pm
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shyshy
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If you managed to be without him for 4 years why do you feel like you can't leave him again? He obviously hasn't changed if you found drugs on him.

January 25, 2005
8:07 pm
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CAMER
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nothing changes if nothing changes, and after not being with him for 4 years....he still had drugs on him..that says alot...think about it!

January 25, 2005
8:12 pm
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Phalic_Liberator
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Anytime a drunk tells someone else they're overreacting it is because they are trying to get their way.

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