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Alone for 2 Months..... Depressed
May 31, 2005
11:34 pm
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luv2luvher
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September 30, 2010
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Well, my son is off for 2 months. He will be with my mother for the month of June and his mother for the month of July. It has been over 5 years since we have spent more then a couple of days apart. I will be able to see him on the weekends of June so it helps alittle. I did not know that it would hurt this bad for him not to be here with me. Everyone says it will do me good and that we need a break from one another. I don't feel that way. The real reason he is with my mother right now is because I don't make enought to keep him in daycare all day and I don't want him to have to sit at a daycare most of his summer. My mother lives about 2 hours away from me. I could see him every day if I wanted to spend 4 hrs on the road each day. (not possible) but it is an option. I found myself crying about 2 hours after he left yesterday.

Is that sad or what? Then tonight I pulled out some pictures of him and was just looking at them brought tears to my eyes. I know I did the right thing by not putting him in daycare. But God it hurts to not have him around. It is almost as bad as my break up with my ex. It burns so bad, and I almost feel like I am going insane. And the worst part is, it has been a little over a day since he has left.

Much Luv,
Luv2Luvher

June 1, 2005
12:00 am
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ACryForHelp
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It's not sad! It's good that you love him (I think it's a him...Yeah, him.) that much!

How old is he? He can't be more than what, 5, if he is in daycare...

From the title of the thread I thought that he was in college or something! LOL!

I spent a good 1/4 of my childhood with Grandma in the city and the rest at home in Naperville, usually just for school.

Don't feel bad... Shit happens and your kid won't hold it against you!

You'll struggle through this but you will be better for it in the long run!

Can you get help from the state for daycare? As a single mother could you get help from the state to get some training so you could get a better job? In AZ they got an UBER SWEET program where they will train you to be a nurse or another important yet under staffed positions! FOR FREE!

Look at the extra time you have as a chance to better yourself, learn something, take up a hobby, whatever! Try learning a craft that you could sell in the long run! (that's what I'm trying to do!)

From what you said above you went through a hard divorse, take some time for yourself and get your head together.

See this as a positive! Don't feel bad! It's not like your giving him up for ever and never seeing him again!

Your not being selfish, your not being mean, your not doing anything wrong at all! At least you have family that can help out!

Honestly, I wish that my mom cared as much for me as you do for your child! Then she wouldn't have taken me away from my father for like 7 years and might have taken the time to get some help!

You'll be OK, no matter how upset you are now! Keep posting if you need to vent! That's what we are here for!

Good luck!

June 1, 2005
10:19 am
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Deena
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I know how you feel. Mine went to the beach with their dad and his g/f for only 4 days. I was calling constantly. It's really not a good feeling, BUT you are doing this because it is in his best interest. What good is it going to do him sitting in a shitty daycare all summer. Think of all the fun he's going to have! And...you get a little break, which you might actually enjoy. It's rough, but you are doing what you have to do. I understand. Keep posting.

June 1, 2005
10:27 am
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kc30
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2 months...wow, I get depressed when my kids are gone overnight with their dad! The thing I've tried to do is to not dwell on it...not feel guilty because I know they're with someone who loves them and takes care of them...and enjoy the downtime, because who knows what could be waiting for me the next day!

But I can totally understand where you're coming from. Hang in there!

kc

June 1, 2005
1:25 pm
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CAMER
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hi Luv, just think you can still call him everyday, and even maybe schedule a visit once a week to see him at your mom's. You are a great dad and changes do happen, and I think this will all be good, of course you will miss him, just be sure to call him regularly and see him on weekends and the time will fly by. My prayers are with you!!!

June 1, 2005
10:34 pm
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luv2luvher
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Thank you all for the encourging comments. Well, I went and saw him today before they head out to my mothers house, I found out they will be back in town this weekend so I will get to see him again this weekend. Then they will be back out of town. I will call him every night :). He told me he was proud of me for coming to see him today. Thought that was cute and funny. Then he clarified himself and said he was glad I came and saw him and that he wants me to come out on the weekends and visit. GOD I LOVE HIM. We took a little nap on the couch this evening together and then my mother got us up to eat dinner and then I told him I would talk to him later then I came home. I know I am doing the right thing, I don't question that. I just really miss that boy. 5years and as little as a weekend apart it is just really hard. I found out today that he is going throught the same thing, trying to get adjusted, since he has left this past Monday, my mother told me he hadn't been eating well. I told her he is just getting adjusted. I just really wanted to tell you all thank you, and it is good to have a place to turn when I am feeling down. I love you all.

Much Luv,
Luv2LuvHer

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