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All about the truth of allaboutcounseling
September 27, 2009
2:12 pm
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lollipop3
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And this....

20
Guest_guest Says:
September 26th, 2009 at 1:20 pm
Hi ToyDemon10, I dont know your AAC username and I havent seen this one there before. I doubt that the SC would get usernames to terrorize posters but who knows – thats not something we can be certain about, but what is certain is that I got redirected to a Porn movies site whenever I tried to submit a thread on AAC during those few days.
SC also didnt exactly humiliate me, other than asking me to leave, however yes she lost her cool with me and Bevdee and the other person (Free/andii/twinks). She didnt handle it well at all. A class action suit is unlikely – its her site and she does what she wants and people join with certain terms and conditions. However me being redirected to a Porn site was definitely not in the TOS.

But to come back to the topic of this article: all those referrals probably give the Site Coordinator $10/month leading to monthly money for her groceries or whatever the amount is.

September 27, 2009
2:18 pm
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lollipop3
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I'm sorry but I do find this mildly amusing. I guess me and my axis of evil are not the only ones that think the way we do.

On a more serious note....I wonder if the SC is going to address any of this?

If he acts on his threats it does appear that it could be detrimental to this site.

And Shonda....part of the reason this site has been so helpful to so many people is because many believed in the guidelines of this site. In my opinion, it is the people that violate those guidelines so blatently that are taking away from this site....not those that are calling the deceptive posters on their lack of integrity.

On that note....gotta get back to my studies....

September 27, 2009
3:19 pm
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marypoppins
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Lolli wrote:

"In my opinion, it is the people that violate those guidelines so blatently that are taking away from this site....not those that are calling the deceptive posters on their lack of integrity."

Well, in MY opinion, some in the latter group seem to be violating the guidelines as well. The SC has stated that we're here to work on our own issues and keep the focus on ourselves. In addition, it's pretty obvious that some simply have grudges against others and calling them out on multiple nicknames is simply a way to put them down.

This post of mine violates guidelines because I'm not talking about ME. I could say that part of my recovery involves standing up to bullies, but that's simply wordplay to continue grudge-inspired posts.

My point is this: everyone's shit stinks.

Mary the Eloquent

September 27, 2009
3:40 pm
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Oh Dearest Mary the Eloquent, you have such a way with words. You made me laugh out loud. What I love about this site is that I CAN offer advice from my experience and I CAN ask for advice. I haven't found that on any other site. They have this stupid "cross talk" rule. Which works in their program and I enjoy it there but I get a little more here. Also here we have no time constraints. In a group session we get 3-5 minutes to say what is on our minds and move to the next thing. No questions asked.

Bitsy

September 27, 2009
4:12 pm
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lollipop3
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Yes Mary everyone's shit does stink and mine is no exception. What is the exception however is that I can admit it as opposed to lying, deceiving, attacking and engaging in crazy making behavior with those who question me about my smelly shit.

And yes, I do have a grudge against Free because I am tired of her antagonizing me every chance she gets as she did in this thread where she initiated this after making an assumption about a post that I made to the originator of this thread. She also chose to engage me in one of WD's thread after he rudely addressed me and I responded in kind. She could have chosen to stay out of it, however, she did not. So here we are.

She's plenty capable of dishing it out but then cries victim when she gets it handed back to her.

September 27, 2009
8:03 pm
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Well, Lolli, I can certainly relate to your situation. Only the people directly involved know the true nature of conflicts between posters on this site. We're faced with standing up for ourselves and having our conflict out there to be judged, or staying silent and letting it go. Perhaps there are other choices. I have tried different approaches, but none seem to result in a fairytale ending of the person apologizing or owning up. I see that this person gets into similar conflicts with others, and while I can try and detach here from this person, she/he is stuck with herself/himself.

Good luck to you.

Mary

September 27, 2009
8:24 pm
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lollipop3
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Hi Mary,
I had to laugh when I read your post ( I laughed when I read the first one as well:) because I too have tried other approaches over the years with various posters and I never achieved a fairy tale ending either, lol. You do have a way with words/phrases.

With that, I think this particular incident has run it's course and hopefully we can all move on to bigger and better things.

Until the next time.....

((((Mary P))))))

September 27, 2009
9:18 pm
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This whole thing is completely comical. It's the type of dramatic situation that these certain posters with multiple personalities/nicknames live for - it's the type of drama that they continue to perpetuate here and in their own lives. The only reason that it remotely effects me, is becauase I see innocent people here whose heads are being fucked with, and it saddens me. These innocent people give their time, emotions and good advice to those who are just here to see how far they can push someone - or to see if they can cause enough of a conflict on a thread to start an all out war between posters. Then the show begins. It's a game to them. And that's what is sad. I mean really, as if anyone here (who is here for the right reasons) really needs to be fucked with. BUT hey ... believe what you will, take a side and enjoy yourself.

The best part of all is that andiifreetreebugs (who has all of the sudden decided that sticking up for someone is good and noble) has FOR YEARS accused posters here who stick up for someone, of being in a clique or a "little gang." Buzz words such as "bullying" and "attacking" usually accompany her gang mentality theories. So none of this is new or surprising. In any event, it doesn't matter what side she's on, free can usually find a way of making herself out to be the victim no matter what.

Free seems to get along best and feels most comfortable with the men on this site, which explains her devotion to WD, as well as her sudden and desperate attempt to climb straight up Paul's ass. And Pauls fixation on screwing with the SC is not only music to her ears, but is more fuel for her degranged fire and misplaced vendetta against the SC for kicking her the hell out of here.

And that GUEST GUEST! He may be a complete and utter wingnut - but my God, he can always get a laugh out of me. Very intuitive, that guy.

Ah well. It is what it is. You're all adults here and can buy into whatever you'd like, but I'm not buying into it.

September 27, 2009
10:23 pm
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I was actually done posting on this thread (or at least hoped I was going to be) but then I went and checked out that link from Shonda again. I was interested to see if Guest had posted any more remarks. Instead what I found was that some low life, shit stirring , drama addict from this site decided to use the women haters site as a forum to promtote their own twisted obsessed vandetta against Destiny.

Yes, I'm sorry to say there are some fucked up, twisted people in our midsts.

Perpetrators in their own lives and perpetrators here.

I feel sorry for the people in their own lives that have to be subjected to that predatory behavior on a daily basis.

September 27, 2009
11:56 pm
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Lolli - gotta love the deranged twists in this new drama ... according to free (holding my stomach laughing hysterically) she's informing Paul that WE'RE the private investigators of the site! I know, I know ... it took me a minute to catch my breath. Staggering ...

September 28, 2009
12:47 am
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Shaney where did you come across that? I just read one of his blogs and there are a couple more past and present posters bashing AAC.

Well AAC'ers if for some reason this site shuts down - sounds like Paul has the answers. And with that we can all just follow him around - And I'm sure he'd love that : ) I'd like to see him be an administer of a site like AAC and all the headaches I'm sure the SC has had over the years.

What I'm finding entertaining is the issues presented by those who once used to post here is not what Paul stands for or really Paul’s issues with AAC. He has to be just scratching his head or maybe he's enjoying it - maybe he'd like more than anything to see this place go down - He thinks he hit a gold mine when it comes to whatever his mission in life is. Sadly he infected a place with his mission to ‘expose to the world’ he says...A place that has meant alot to ALOT of people. Mich's post about it being 3 yrs today - THAT is what AAC is truly about. Good job there Paul –mission accomplished - pat yourself on the back but next time get your facts straight.

So those with issues with AAC - now have a place to find each other to bash AAC. And what is their point in doing so? Justice because they got banned? And if free for example is 'informing' Paul of whatever – good gawd she was just here posting on these boards AS ONE of AAC's posters!! And guest_guest would still love to be here posting...

Ok time for me to go to bed.

September 28, 2009
8:50 am
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Yes Shaney, as I mentioned above....there are obviously some very sick individuals posting on this site.

It's such a shame really what this site has turned into. Of course there are still good people that come here that are trying to get help and support for themselves but unfortunately, it appears that it is becomming more and more difficult to do so.

I have been "reprimanded" previously for saying this but remember how great this site was just a few short years ago? How much support there was? And fun! Sometimes I go back over those threads and just can't believe how far downhill this place has gone.

I'm just thankful that there are still people like you around 🙂

LL.....

Personally I don't think this site will shut down. Unless of course the SC decides to shut it down because of the psycho predators that have decided to set up camp here. But I don't think it will be because of Pauls site or because of the recent drama that has gone on here. As you know there has been drama/conflicts in the past and will be again in the future no doubt. The fact is that people like Free are idiots and will continue to be an idiots. Nothing anyone says or does is going to change that. And I'm sure there is more than one Paul in the world who wants to spend his life playing victim because some women think men are dogs.

In the end...I sure everything will work out.

September 28, 2009
1:13 pm
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I don't have a lot of time at the moment but hope this makes sense…

1. Enough Already and Mary Poppins both used their AAC names to post on Pauls thinger...and because of that they shouldn't be allowed to post on AAC again...per guidelines - only use your AAC posting name here. Have more thought on that but later.

2. Isn't it unethical of Paul the man of ethic responsibility to inform the world of what nots ethical to not just expose this site (his issues are with the SC) but the posters here as well? He's exposed this site of people sharing the stories - thier hurts their whatever. To me its almost like stumbling across an AA meeting or the like and the people inside are sharing their stories – and Paul comes across some outdated information posted on the front door – then starts using threats and demands and shakes up the community on the inside. Bad analogy I know. But I hope my point comes across.

September 28, 2009
1:35 pm
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lovinglife - I'm not ignoring your question to me, I just think that if I post the link, I'm doing exactly what freetreebugsandii wants me to do --- which is direct everyone to a site where she has attempted to discredit specific people here. Typical pathetic shit ... different day. :o) When I stand back and look at her behavior, it really makes me glad my kids don't have her as a teacher. Scary thought.

September 28, 2009
2:06 pm
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LL,

"Enough Already and Mary Poppins both used their AAC names to post on Pauls thinger:"

What the fuck are you talking about? I never posted on Paul's anything?

Mary

September 28, 2009
2:06 pm
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LL,

"Enough Already and Mary Poppins both used their AAC names to post on Pauls thinger:"

What the fuck are you talking about? I never posted on Paul's anything?

Mary

September 28, 2009
2:09 pm
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Dear SC - how long are we to endure this?

September 28, 2009
2:10 pm
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How would anybody know that Mary Poppins on aac is the same Mary Poppins on the other site anyhow?

Getting curiouser and curiouser. I haven't even bothered to look at the other site, btw. Seems anyone could use anyone's name on a dif site? Who would know the dif?

September 28, 2009
2:14 pm
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lollipop3
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SD,

"Seems anyone could use anyone's name on a dif site? Who would know the dif?"

I think you've hit the nail on the head with this.

Chances are the same people playing the head games here have carried it over to the other site.

My suggestion to all would be that if you decide to check out that other site...to take anything you see there with a grain of salt with regard to posters here.

It's nothing more than the psycho wingnuts doing what psycho wingnut's do.

September 28, 2009
2:17 pm
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This is completely ridiculous. And I don't appreciate being accused of something I haven't done.

LL, where are your facts? This is slander. Seems the people making accusations about posters need to just back off and focus on their own recovery.

I'll be sending a note to the SC about this.

Mary

September 28, 2009
2:22 pm
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lollipop3
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Anam...

Believe me that I am not trying to be adversarial when I say this but you don't have to endure this at all.

As far as I can tell this non-sense (which admittedly I have been a part of) has pretty much been contained to this thread.

There are posters on this site that have gone above and beyond in their quest to cause turmoil on this site and personaly, I don't see the problem in letting it play out here.

The more the members here can see for themselves how truly toxic these sickos are...the better they will be in my opinion.

September 28, 2009
2:23 pm
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I googled Paul Elam's site and saw some comments by former AAC people on the allaboutcounseling link, but I didn't see any Mary Poppins comments.

Anyway, I have to get actual work done now and live my life, which thank goodness, has none of this bullshit in it.

Mary

September 28, 2009
2:23 pm
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lollipop3
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Mary....

Someone is posting on that Paul Elam's site using your username to bash AAC.

September 28, 2009
2:28 pm
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Maybe if people would stick to THEIR ISSUES, and the posters here, there wouldn't be so much BrouHaHa!??

Sure, most here have good intentions, but some don't seem to post ANYTHING about their personal struggles anymore, just show up when they want to create drama, feed drama or preach.

None of them make an effort to new posters and their LEGITIMATE stories.

They just want to wallow in AAC past?

I'll tell ya somethin. It feels really good when i see those longtimers post about the positive growth they had, come back and thank everyone, AND keep ALL THE PAST GRIEVANCES out of today. It's great to see some of them post for support, or a new problem. Stay focused on the site objectives ya know?

Maybe offer some positive support to someone new. Keep the flame burning, pass the torch, and not be so selfish. Is that so much to ask?

If people have moved on, got beyond their time frame of problems, why must they disrespect others timeframe?

(I simply can't post to all that I'ld like to. I don't have time either and that is usually the main reason, if it's for a negative reason i choose to NOT feed that and ignore)

Some sit back, take in info, to create their own little statistics, pertaining to site participants conduct, or judgements about others behaviour, bring back old grievances and perpetuate them, then choose a time to air things, because we all need to be informed!? Some of us should just Shut up, or this place needs to be shut down?

GIVE ME a BREAK!

These are all deeply seated control and Codep issues. Grudges. Some will just never let them go, and use it to bring others down, whereever the target feels right.

Pick on AAC because theirs lots of vulnerable people here. Well NOT all of us!

LET GO of past conflicts with anonymous participants because this isn't in your backyard. We're dealing with our messy backyards here right? OR work it out in a thread with the poster the conflict is related to OR just ignore and forget about it.

HA! I visited Nomarriage.com, Henry Markow.com, Elams Various sites, various other bashing sites ( religious, political, gender based, NUMEROUS ONES) but I'm not going to campaign to shut them down.

Let people have their little battles, their prejudices and beefs online. I opt to not visit or participate.

It's not up to me to make them change

I take care of what comes within my sphere of existance, shows up at my door, cuts me off on the street, and THAT is when i will take up the battle.

I hope for wisdom and the best outcome as a community member, and honestly regret my missteps.

So to those who wish to destroy, without considering objectively everything involved, pat yourselves on the back, U know who you are. You're above most of us here and remind us of that on occasion.

I'm beginning to regret ever posting here. MY Pain, MY struggles. Only a few ever seem to understand or give a damn.

There's an undercurrent of competition here, subtle power plays that fuel the undermining. I can honestly say I don't want to compete with anyone. I'm REALLY not trying to create more dysfunction here or have a pedestal. I can truly appreciate those here who have great wisdom and strength. I don't wish to knock them down due to my own weakness's.

And another has been hurt by this site.We can't even communicate now. Not related to this. But most likely somebody reads her posts here and has exacted some revenge in her life. Pretty SICK.

This can happen to anyone here, so blame the victim right? Maybe the victim made bad choices, but MOST of us here have, and it's the reason why we come here. It's no fun being hunted down with your utter destruction in mind.

So 3+ years ago it was safe to be imperfect, make mistakes, and nobody would call you out on that in a particularily HARSH cruel way? Nobody fought then? There were lots of jokes and fun.HA!

All those things exist with people who came here after that but it's simply not good enough. Doesn't compare.

( that sounds like the kind of brow beating most of us have endured, and are trying to heal from)

Looking at this thread it seems so.

But I'm reading others and that simply is not true for this site as a whole. Most of the threads are people making an effort to use this site as it is meant for.

I wasn't here 3+ years ago. So i guess my contributions or personal struggles are worth SHIT. I'm just not worth "it"?! I'm sure lots of us who don't fit in that 3+ year bracket are feeding some doubts now.

You have to be incredibly brave or stupid to share? Maybe both.

Close off communication then where are we all at?

Powerless really. Not able to find truth or heal with our peers? We'll all be sharing with an "authority"?

I like lovinlifes 2nd anology.

I saw it as this: walking into a group therapy session, and telling all the participants, that for one mistake, a Coke machine in the hallway, a collection taken for the food bank, an advert to purchase a book related to group discussions, or one or two participants who are woman or man haters ( maybe one was put in jail for assault and has a history of violence), is enough to shut ya'll down. This is the last day, and so far there is no plan to open the doors again.

Shut down all AA related recovery programs, because there may be a few participants who are a danger to others. The rules are don't become intimate with program participants outside of the meetings. Your sponsor is your only outside contact.

....and here in AAC, ANONIMITY with ONE nic. Help yourself, honest sharing and feedback.

Now for the sick minds that don't respect any bounderies and just hurt others? I KNOW i don't fall under that category and i only hope i don't fall victim to such a person EVER again.

Happy recovery everyone!

September 28, 2009
2:29 pm
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Well, what they're doing is crap, Lolli, because I've never bashed the site and have respected the SC's decisions.

Should the SC happen to read comments someone is making using the Mary Poppins name (someone who must have a pretty sad life to get off on this kind of thing), she'll know from the email I just sent her that it's not me.

I challenge anyone(so dramatic, I know) to go back through threads and find any evidence of me bashing the site or the SC. It's uncharacteristic. And I sincerely doubt that the imposter Poppins has my wit, my vocabulary, and my nearly perfect grammar and spelling!

Ok, really, I have to go.

Peace to all.

Mary

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