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Alcoholics in Recovery-How long have you been sober
August 25, 2006
12:53 am
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Anonymous
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September 24, 2010
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August 25, 2006
12:57 am
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pearlseeker
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I don't know if I was an alcoholic, but I had a serious drinking problem. I just decided one day that I did not want my kids to look on me as a lush. I used alcohol to self medicate because I was married to an abusive man. I made the decision to stop abusing alcohol when I was 39. I am now 58 and I have stayed sober. I do drink socially once and awhile, but I prefer to have a clear head and a healthy body. I am really into health now.

August 25, 2006
8:05 pm
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Bramble
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September 30, 2010
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Hi,I am in my 18th year of sobriety and it was tough at first as I had drank for 13 years .I hit bottom and went to AA.It was the only thing for me as I had tried "controlled" drinking for years to no avail.My life was a mess....it was unmanageable and yet I still had a husband,job,home and a clean driving licence but I had had enough of the sickness of alcoholism.I will go to AA for the rest of my life and will try to help other alcoholics.By stopping drinking and working the recovery program I found a new (and better) life.I got sober and now I have a character building blueprint and I love it.B

August 25, 2006
8:41 pm
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lollipop3
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Congratulations to you pearlseeker and Bramble on your sucess.

I just celebrated 2 years last week and feel better physically and emotionally than I have in....well....ever.

Take care,
Lolli

August 31, 2006
8:20 am
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onthemend
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I am sober today, but celebrated 5 years of sobriety last March. Now I am dealing with the heart of my codependency issues. Go figure. After 30 years as an addict and alcoholic I have accepted that I have had a codependent relationship with an inanimate object for 30 years. How long will it take for me to be able to treat a person like a person? Another path on the road to recovery. Thanks to "the blueprint" all is possible as long as I don't drink or use again or over it.

August 31, 2006
10:17 pm
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doubleloss
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congratulations to all of you!

i have a question, those of you attending AA, do you also go to intensive one-on-one therapy to deal with your root issues (of what pushed you to self-medicate with alcohol) in the first place?

do you think there are levels of recovery - like 1. staying sober/not using/ etc 2. learning to let go and belive in the HP and then 3 and up when you actually get to deal with the deeep issues.

your insight will be much appreciated. thank you.

August 31, 2006
10:24 pm
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June 12 2002, clean & sober. Sometimes I take it for granted, other times I miss the dope so much... but those are the times when I realize exactly what an accomplishment I achieved... and keep on achieving. It's not easy, but the more time you get- the more you want to keep it.

doubleloss-
As for your question, I did the intense 90 meetings in 90 days (more than that really) and kept it up for a while, but I don't go anymore. I've always had a psychiatrist, a therapist and in the beginning, a day treatment drug program. I hope you don't need that, but for those that do, it helped me get a jumpstart on my sobriety. I needed the discipline and extra support.

wishing all much serenity, health and happiness,
-ella

August 31, 2006
10:51 pm
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lollipop3
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Hi Double,

I attended AA in the beginning, but found that, even being an alcoholic, that Al-anon was a better match for me. At this point, I don't go to either, but I still see my therapist twice a month.

As far as there being "levels" of recovery. Yes. I believe there are levels of recovery.....which are very aptly described by the 12 Steps.

Obviously abstinence being of utmost importance.

The steps are a wonderful and guideline to the levels of recovery.

Admitting you have a problem and that your life has become unmanageable.

Accepting that you cannot do it alone.

Learning to let others help you.

Looking HONESTLY at yourself.

These are all different phases of recovery and things that we do in our own time.

Personally, I have found therapy to be the single most important part of my recovery. Once I got passed the drinking part...I needed help to learn to deal with all of the emotions that were buried under the surface.

September 1, 2006
3:06 am
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doubleloss
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thank you.

another question, do you know or instances where the "sponsor" becomes controlling of the person they sponsor?

does AA encourage people to seek additional help -intense therapy for example? does it discourage it? or it's something that it's not talked about?

September 4, 2006
5:42 pm
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healintime
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September 27, 2010
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Hi Double,

Wow! Way to go everyone for all that time! I'm a relative newbie at 14 month sober and yes, I think there are levels of recovery. For me, alcohol was self-medication and it has taken having a clear head to really start to deal with the underlying "stuff."

I'm an adult child of an alcoholic, didn't even pick up a drink until my early 20s, and realize now that my codependency is just as much, if not more of a problem than alcohol. The two went hand in hand for me.

I go to AA meetings, maybe one a week now. I did 90 in 90 too in the beginning - and yes, I know of instances where a sponsor becomes controlling. Sponsors are human - they have no training as such - one year clean automatically qualifies you to have a sponsee.

It can be -hard- managing recovery from codependency and alcohol. Service and the good of the group are big elements of AA - how do you manage that when you're finding out that caretaking is lethal for you and taking care of your own needs is something that you have to learn to do to recover?

I found that one on one therapy plus AA worked for me. AA helped with knowing that I wasn't alone and being able to see how sobriety had changed people's lives. My therapist helped me look at where it all started (adult child) and deal with my tendency to subjugate my feelings and to let go of some of my perfectionism (some!) as a coping mechanism. Basically - all the codependency boxes 😉

This is getting long - bottom line is that whatever works for you, works for you - but I agree with lollipop that my therapist was a godsend. Drinking doesn't help - but stopping alone doesn't mean that the problems go away. And without your crutch those problems can feel overwhelming in the beginning.

More than a year down the track I've had to change career and let some relationships go - it was hard, but my life today is so, so much better. I still feel like I'm only at the start of my journey tho' - so yes, definitely levels to sobriety! I'm learning every day...

September 5, 2006
3:51 am
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Anonymous
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No doubt about it, it takes time to heal and fully recover. I believe I will spend the rest of my life healing...and growing:)

Its like at first you break a bone. You need drugs to numb the area so the doctor can work on it. Then you have no drugs but you have a cast, and your broken bone is healing but protected. That how I see rehab. Then the cast comes off, but your muscles have atrophied and you need some training to get your functionality up to par with a physical therapist, or in my case...a mental therapist lol...

Anyways...thats my analogy...*shrug*

September 5, 2006
6:12 am
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confused as heck
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September 24, 2010
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Wow! Congratulations to all of you! I am fortunate that I never had to deal directly with alcoholism, but I think that's because I watched my godparents go from vibrant people with everything to live for to alcoholics. Both reacted in a different way. My godfather just drank till he passed out, he was a happy drunk. My godmother on the other hand became a violent drunk. She lost her job and her marriage and moved back in with her mother. When she was drunk she would beat her mother, sometimes until she knocked her unconscious and she was bleeding.

My godmother has just celebrated her 9th year sober. My godfather celebrated his 2nd. (They are not and were never married to each other).

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