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Afghan sisters...LOOKING FORWARD...
November 6, 2006
6:09 pm
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needtoheal
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GG?????

November 6, 2006
6:20 pm
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ggfred4
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Yea, need, no more scum, you are SCUM-FREE!!!

Actually is was quite the odd day, the best thing, I didn't hurt myself last night (can't believe I am freely talking about it here, see mich, how much you helped?) and physically feeling better...I taught, I caught up a lot, and still managed to stay on top of things here, except for the last two hours...Glad all my expensive drugs are working...

so glad about coda; I went to a meeting online last night and spilt my guts...see mich, it is pouring out girl, so glad you have my back...
I think there may be a text one tonight I might go to, but I am waiting for my husband to say enough is enough...My exsponsor told me that I should tell him the truth and I did, that was so hard, always lie to him to make things easier...He actually has been supportive and is probably happy that I am not spending money on a counselor...but, my kids think I am talking to my teacher friends here, now in Afghanistan!!! One of my twins said yesterday, gosh, mom, you are always on the computer....you must have lots of new friends....I just smiled...see mich, I need my new friends, do you????

well, the h will be here in 5 minutes and I don't want him to think I have been on the computer...wait, isn't it Mon. nite football! yes, I will be fine then, except, he didn't get any this weekend with me getting sick and now he is gonna start the stuff! ugh....

I am just thinking that I feel pretty good and I had the most horrible night and the most worrisome day thinking about my sis...but I am going to win this battle...feeling brave now...but I know I can't do it alone sisters, I am not that strong; I fall down easily, we need to be here for each other, but it has to be our choice...

damn, he is here...gotta go....

(need) (mich) (cyn) (LL) (kroika) (army)

LOVE YOU!!!

November 6, 2006
8:25 pm
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ggfred4
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okay, it is 2 hours later, and the good feeling seems to be diminishing some...LL, is it something about the dark?...my worst times are at night and the wee hours of the a.m....or maybe it is just that I am so busy during the day?...maybe there is no connection...

my friend that toughly told me her boundaries emailed me and acted like it never happened and wanted a little support...now I think I must be crazy...or am I too sensitive...I am not tough like that....real confused over the whole recovery thing and being nice/mean too...oh well, maybe one day...LL, I really want all of us to do some recovery work...take some steps forward...

I feel like I am one step forward, get proud and happy, then 1-2 steps back quickly, too quickly...

oops! almost apologized for rambling, but I caught myself, okay, I deleted the "s" word!

I love you mich, I want you to be my friend, I love you for who you are, I accept you for you are!!!

November 6, 2006
8:42 pm
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ggfred4
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sisters, need to clarify...the email I got was clear,,,but the tongue-lashing last night was rough,,,most people would have told off this person,,,but I care for her so much and she has helped me and she thinks she is helping me and maybe she is, maybe it is that tough love approach...I am more the gentle, trusting approach...will have to see...if I could copy and send last night's conversation, my sisters here would be mad...maybe she is trying to get me to stand up for myself? I don't know...so damned codependent! rambling again, no one around...miss my grown up kids too...

November 6, 2006
9:00 pm
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hello afghan women,

I have read most of what's been written while I slept and did waking-up stuff earlier.

I just want to share a story from my life that may relate. About 15 years ago I went on an Outward Bound course... 3 weeks of hiking up and down snow-covered mountains with a 50+ pound pack on my back, with a group of 7 other people (plus 2 instructors).

At one point, one member of the group started lagging, and the rest of the group kept getting further ahead. Finally the instructors stopped us and read us the riot act -- the gist of which is that no group can go faster than the slowest member. If you accept that you are a group, then whatever needs to be dealt with, has to get dealt with. And when you're out in the middle of the snowy mountains, leaving the group is not an option.

It gave me a really visceral understanding of a few important truths.

Hope there is a germ of an idea in there that is useful.

love, kousin k (heading over to my kitchen now to reply to greetings)

November 6, 2006
9:14 pm
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ScaredinMichigan
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Are any of my sisters still around and willing to talk to me? I know that I am a little early..

November 6, 2006
9:23 pm
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ScaredinMichigan
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GG? LL? Need? Cyn??

November 6, 2006
9:29 pm
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ScaredinMichigan
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Gg, you asked about PO'd. PO'd in the Springs is my cousin...

November 6, 2006
9:43 pm
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ggfred4
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mich, did not leave you, had company drop in and ran to type this...may be an hour, who knows....love you,not leave you...

November 6, 2006
9:44 pm
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needtoheal
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Hi girls.. I am here... Its 9:44 pm Eastern/// Anyone around??

November 6, 2006
9:45 pm
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ScaredinMichigan
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Loove you too...miss you horribly...started a new thread...

November 6, 2006
9:46 pm
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ScaredinMichigan
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Need, I started a new thread..this takes too long to load..

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