Avatar
Please consider registering
guest
sp_LogInOut Log In
Lost password?
Advanced Search
Forum Scope


Match



Forum Options



Minimum search word length is 3 characters - maximum search word length is 84 characters
The forums are currently locked and only available for read only access
sp_TopicIcon
Adult surviver of child abuse: Exoticflower going through some issues
July 24, 2009
12:38 am
Avatar
exoticflower
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Hello all, I've been popping back a lot lately, I know.

As those who know me are aware, I've been digging deep into the past as part of my work through AA, and I keep returning to the physical and mental abuse in my family of origin and it's been wearing me thinner and thinner when I find myself continually exposed to abusive dry drunks in my sober adulthood. And so naturally, I decided to pick up the most painful thing possible, "A Child Called It". The first 3 chapters were my life growing up. Singled out as the primary target for the abuse, the shame and humiliation and such I was raised with from the ages of 8 to 15. It was always in secret from my father and at the and of my stepmother who was a dry drunk in AA. And, I shook myself up and put the book away but am left with residual feelings of anger and grief and pain and fear all over again having thought back to what it was like for me. I didn't experiance the hell that many did, but it was still far more than the average child ought to have coped with, and today the scars still effect my decisions, relationships, choices in partners and friends, etc.

I'm grateful that I have been the polar opposite with my own daughter, never allowing so much as a slap or demeaning word to my own daughter (exoticbaby is 5 now, can you believe it? She starts school in a few weeks!).

Anyway, I just wanted to share some of that pain here and am thinking I will be stopping in a bit more than I have in the past couple of years and ask for some guidance, love and support from these rooms, the same sort that carried me through much suffering a few years ago. Thanks for still being here. ((((hugs))) to SC for keeping this site strong, it's such a safe place to turn and has so many times given me a jumping off point and contributed in such a huge way to my growth over the past 4 years since I found it.

July 24, 2009
7:19 am
Avatar
It No Longer Matters
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 72
Member Since:
September 27, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Hugs to youu

Bitsy

July 24, 2009
8:46 am
Avatar
atalose
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 18
Member Since:
September 24, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

exotic,

Congrats on your continued work in AA and for being a great mom!!!!!

Have you given any though to trying ACA (Adult Children of Alcoholics) meetings? I know many in my al-anon group also attend them I myself would like to check it out.

Glad your posting!!!

((exotic))

Atalose

~~Hope has a place, but not above reality~~

July 24, 2009
6:52 pm
Avatar
exoticflower
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

I've not had the best experience with the groups here, I'm thinking a little group therapy through an actual counseling center might be better for me right now-- and just saying when need be that it's still hard and still hurts. Thanks for the love, guys!!

July 24, 2009
11:38 pm
Avatar
exoticflower
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

(by 'here' I mean my local alanon group, not this site mind you!) 🙂

July 25, 2009
8:56 am
Avatar
It No Longer Matters
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 72
Member Since:
September 27, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

I found a book that really helped me. It was called Perfect Daughters. You might want to check it out. I am the Adult Child of an Alcoholic Mother.

Bitsy

July 28, 2009
1:11 am
Avatar
exoticflower
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Bitsy, thank you. I will look for that tomorrow at the library.

I think that tonight or tomorrow I might just to get it off of my chest type up a bit of what it was like and what I go through now and how they connect. I know some of you already know about it, but it still helps to share in a private environment like this one.

Forum Timezone: UTC -8
Most Users Ever Online: 349
Currently Online:
28
Guest(s)
Currently Browsing this Page:
1 Guest(s)
Top Posters:
onedaythiswillpass: 1134
zarathustra: 562
StronginHim77: 453
free: 433
2013ways: 431
curious64: 408
Member Stats:
Guest Posters: 49
Members: 111162
Moderators: 5
Admins: 3
Forum Stats:
Groups: 8
Forums: 74
Topics: 38716
Posts: 714574
Newest Members:
AndrinNetzer, MaarcusPedersen, MarcusPedersen, eyeconcepts, junwork52, whitedental
Moderators: arochaIB: 1, devadmin: 9, Tincho: 0, Donn Gruta: 0, Germain Palacios: 0
Administrators: admin: 21, ShiningLight: 572, emily430: 29

Copyright © 2021 MH Sub I, LLC. All rights reserved.
Terms of Use | Privacy Policy | Cookie Policy | Health Disclaimer | Do Not Sell My Personal Information