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Accepting... letting go and recovery
December 9, 2003
11:39 am
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artist 2
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I cannot see some things about myself and therefore cannot accept.

They say the first step to recovery is to relenquish power.

If I were in the program, I'd say first step for me is to admit I have no power of control. That control is my addiction and I cannot control my addiction.

December 9, 2003
11:53 am
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mj
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Back in 1985, a friend of mine revealed the 12 step program to me. I could not for the life of me surrender my power to an unknown source and admit defeat or helplessness. I thought it showed weakness and I wasn't about to say that my life was unmanageable. I knew I could fix anything.

I am more humble now. I know that my life needs to be surrendered at times because I can't control it, I didn't cause it, and I certainly can't fix it.

Now I use the Serenity prayer, God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, Courage to change the things I can, and Wisdom to know the difference.

I learned the my HP could be anything that I wanted to let go to...a group such as here on the AAC....a friend, or the God of my choosing, be it my spiritual self.

It is through looking at oneself...and my own actions that I learned that they only one I can change is me. My response to things, my reaction to things. I can honestly communicate and if I don't have expectations, I am not disappointed. Hugs...

December 9, 2003
11:57 am
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I hope you don't mind my sharing this with my bf. He's the one who suggested the addiction. This is the clearest, most succinct description I've heard. Thanks MJ for your wisdom once again.

(xxx), artist 2

December 9, 2003
12:07 pm
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mj
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Share away my friend....Hugs to both of you....I hope that your love can survive....as I think that it must be pretty special for you to keep trying.

December 9, 2003
4:57 pm
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HARRYO
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I remember I had an industrial accident a little over ten years ago. I nearly was electricuted by putting my hand in an open 440 volt circuit. Fortunately the conditions weren't right to kill me. If the path of the electricity would have been conducted through my heart, I would have died. Instead I lost control of my muscles for a few seconds they call it the "let go" stage where you can't let go of what you have grabbed on to. When I did let go it threw me across the room. The most terrifying 5 or 6 seconds of my life.

When I don't let uncontrollable hurtful energy take a path through my heart I will live. When I let it go, then I can become healthy again.
(spiritually and emotionally)

December 10, 2003
1:31 am
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vegas
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Recovery...I imagine that is a life long process...if not, then something to maintain for the rest one's life. Well, I suppose it depends on the person. I know for myself, once I am "recovered" I will have to work at it for as long as I live.

I am curious...how did you guys actually "surrender your power/relinquish control"? Is it externally where you do nothing to the outside world? Or is it solely internally, letting go of the thoughts and desires?

Does giving up control mean becoming passive? not thinking for myself?

December 11, 2003
11:04 am
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artist 2
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I think letting go means, when you feel that irrestible urge to grab onto and manipulate that thing you dont' want, you can't live with... if you stop and say, it's not mine to deal with. That's letting go...

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