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Abuse Ex trying to get back into my life please respond
September 4, 2001
11:11 pm
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AngelHeart18
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September 27, 2010
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my name is Angel i would like everyone who reads this to please resopnd .. here goes
i was with my ex boyfriend for about a year.. and we have been split up for 3 months and now he is calling saying he misses me... i miss him too and feel like giving it another try but i know deep in my heart that to go back with him would be wrong and i do not want to end up where i was a few months ago with no job and no friends and fighting with my family because of him.. now i have a job and friends and getting along with my family and i dont wanna mess that up because with him i never acomplished anything .. and he is saying that he has changed .. but i know that if i got back with him little by little things would slip back to the way they were... but i know i cant help him if he does not want to help himself..
i would apreciate all comments and support

September 4, 2001
11:12 pm
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AngelHeart18
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sorry topic is abusive ex

September 5, 2001
11:24 am
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pill
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September 30, 2010
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then don't get back with him. You have plenty of love - save it for someone worthy. You're not his savior, God is. You're only an innocent bystander.

September 5, 2001
11:47 am
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Ladeska
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Do you really, really, really need to hear any of us say what you already KNOW in your gut? I don't think so, but.....just in case......STAY where you are, on the road you are on and just say NO. It's a line of crap he's feeding you. No. 1 - he can't change that fast. And if you "know" as you have said here that things would slip back to the way they were - then you have answered your own question, right?

The real question is - why do you feel comfortable without pain in your life that you obviously feel like - you deserve? That is the question...

So, IF you love yourself, IF you respect yourself, IF you value your own life - you will go in the opposite direction of him and anyone who smells like him.

It's time you did some introspection about WHY you believe you are worthy of this kind of abusive treatment from a man? There is an answer there and you need to find it. 9.9 times out of 10, it's because we have believed a lie about ourselves regarding a male authority figure in our life early on. They didn't love us as they should have, or abandoned us, or abused us and we, as the child - formed the thinking that it was something we did or didn't do. Our self esteem never got formed right, wasn't healthy. But, we trusted that this belief we formulated about ourselves - was true. It has to be - it came from us, we figured it out and stamped it fact. We got through life then - believing that and building our life and our life's patterns on it as if it were a solid foundation. When in all reality - it's shaky as hell and will eventually topple our structure.

So....it's time that you go back there - see where the lie is and pull it out by the roots and disbelieve it once and for all. This one thing - your relationship with the most important male in your life - if it was crippled - will always affect your relationship with a man until you critically think it through and set the broken bones straight and let them heal as they should. Sweeping all this under the carpet and not doing the work - will always lead to you needing to compulsively - seeking to be the reason your man changes or being the target of abuse if he doesn't - because you think you are the bad little girl that deserves it somehow...you made daddy not be good....you weren't good enough, pretty enough, smart enough, whatever enough. Time for the grown up woman - to lead the little girl into the light of truth.

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