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A Positve Thread of Support
September 20, 2009
9:12 am
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It No Longer Matters
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I have greatly benefitted from being able to come here and spill my story or to be more graphic, emotionally vomit. I came here in June of 2007 when a google search for "emotional incest" brought me here to deal with the man I had been dating at the time. I FINALLY broke things off with him in April of 2008 and have been trying to heal and reclaim me ever since.

I have gotten better by being here and getting feedback from the people here. Some were harsh. Tell It Like It Is Nappy zinged me on more than one occassion and oh how I wish she were here now. Someone named Doris Day came and went quickly but she was an inspiration to us all. MaStrong has helped more than just me. She is a Fountain of Wisdom. There are too many to name them all of who has posted to me and helped me.

Over the past couple of months it has been disturbing to read on here that some people may be posting under various names and "messing" with those of us who are here. I remember well the several threads that got out of hand. Some were on the support side and I know of one that was on the Liberation Brew side that was removed by the site coordinator.

What I am asking is that this continue to be a positive site where those of us who are hurting, struggling, wanting to get better can continue to come and feel safe. I do not know who is double posting and who is not. I cannot keep track of everyone's story when I accept them at face value much less try to figure out if A=Z and Z=B if B and A are the same person or friends or whatever. And really I don't care. I just want to clean up my own side of the street and get better.

There are new people coming here almost every day and some of them need help just as much as I once needed it. When I first came here I found a "safe" and anonymous place where I could post and receive advice. I feel like some our our bickering has caused the newcomers not to feel safe and I hate that for them.

I don't know who you are and don't care, but if you are coming here to screw around with those of us who are here to get better, I am asking you please take your emotional games somewhere else. I would hate to see this site closed down, or lose the ability to help others as it has helped and is helping me.

As they say:

Peace, Love, and Happiness to All,

Bitsy

Bitsy

September 20, 2009
9:23 am
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lovinglife
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Bitsy - excellent post.

September 20, 2009
10:15 am
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_anonymous
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Bitsy- I admire you for being a class act.

September 20, 2009
11:44 am
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KareLoveLy
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hi,Bitsy I appreciate you for making this Thread I'm fairly still new to this site I don't think I've been here for more then a mth.I actually stumbled across this site after seeing how loving, supportive,& safe it was I decided to tell my story this site has really been my support system & it has had such a impact on my life(I'm still struggling through my journey,but the support here helps I just hope & plead with the people who are not here for the right reason to PLEASE STOP!PLEASE...arguing is only feeding the fire..let's continue to make this site a SUPPORITIVE & LOVING site..PLEASE
Thanks Bitsy

((KareLovely))

September 20, 2009
2:43 pm
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My fear is this. I have been to the online Adult Children of Alcoholics site. I am attending a Celebrate Recovery Program at a Church near me. In both of those programs we cannot ask for advice or offer advice or tell people what they should and shouldn't do. There is to be no Cross Talk. You can share and try to recover on your own. Sure there is a fellowship, but none of that helped me as much as coming here posting my story and getting the feedback from others.

Yes, I can hear from you that your boyfriend/husband/lover was a liar and a cheat and you kicked their sorry ass to the curb all day long, but in my mind I can rationalize that MY situation is different and you just don't know what is really going on with me. It took me coming here and having others tell me that my boyfriend was a liar and a cheat and was doing me wrong for it to FINALLY SINK IN MY HEAD. Ma Strong, Nappy, and Horsefly were the most vocal. Bitsy, honey, wake up and smell the coffee. HE MOVED ANOTHER WOMAN IN THE HOUSE WITH HIM AND YOU ARE STILL GOING BACK FOR MORE? HAVE YOU LOST YOUR EVER LOVIN' MIND? See no one would have asked me that in CR or ACOA. They would have listened to me. Asked how I felt, and sagely nodded their heads.

If we cannot police ourselves and follow the rules will it be shut down or will it be one where we can only post our story and not get any feed back from anyone.

THIS SITE WORKED FOR ME WHEN NOTHING ELSE DID.

Please do not ruin this site for those of us who need it just like it is.

Thanks,

Bitsy.

Bitsy

September 20, 2009
8:18 pm
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mistyrain
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Thanks Bitsy

I agree. I came to this site to find some support not to worry if people are backstabbing me and tracking me down. I have enough of that in my life already.

September 21, 2009
1:51 pm
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Bitsy

September 21, 2009
2:18 pm
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darkeyes
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thanks bitsy, your one of the best!!!!opened my eye also.

September 21, 2009
4:35 pm
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MsGuided
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((Bitsy))

I agree 100% with what you posted. We can only hope people stay authentic, follow the rules and post under one nic.

It ain't all pretty here, whether it's the problems shared in honesty, or the malice thrown around.

Hopefully there are enough good people here to keep the focus on honest sharing and support. I think there are.

Presently i have some Bugs/Worms/Spyware issues that are messing with my PC..nothing that can spread to users i communicate with.

I think My posting about this on another thread has brought a lot of the "unsafe" stuff to surface ( related or not)

(Yes I am questioning how i am dealing with some issues and trying to remain calm)

What's done is done.

Thanks for being real and reminding us to do the same.

September 26, 2009
3:17 pm
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Bitsy

September 26, 2009
3:43 pm
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bonni
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September 26, 2009
3:55 pm
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bonni
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dear bitsy,
i grabbed my shovel and went to digging. thanks for the idea.

bonni

September 26, 2009
3:59 pm
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bonni
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September 26, 2009
4:04 pm
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It No Longer Matters
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Let's do our best to help others recover. If those of us who feel we have gotten somewhat better by being here don't continue to support the new ones coming who will be here?

As I stated above. I would not be where I am today if it weren't for this site, but I am just so tired of the pettiness. It wears me out.

Please Love and Happiness to ALL.

Bitsy

September 26, 2009
5:43 pm
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mamacinnamon
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Bless you Bitsy. You said a mouthfull. The bantering ususally does not get to me but this time it is spilling onto most every thread I read, which isn't a lot. Totally uncalled for and yes, a detriment to anyone who is honestly trying to get help.

September 26, 2009
6:59 pm
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bonni
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bump

September 26, 2009
7:24 pm
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I need others to respond POSITIVELY to this thread to counteract some of the negativity we have had going on recently. Pretty much since this is my thread and I started it...if you can say something nice; don't say anything at all.

Bitsy

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