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A new "Board" on All About Counseling? Your vote counts.
December 20, 2002
3:33 pm
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Anonymous
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OK, I had another idea... suppose there was just a "rant" space, where you could start a thread to rant or be angry or vent or whatever you call it. And only the person who opened it can add to it, in that rant space. So it doesn't give everyone a right to be angry and have angry abusive exchanges, it just gives everyone the right to simply be angry and express it, without fear that someone will fan the flames with an exchange.

Well, I guess then why have the thread feature at all, if people can read it and are not allowed to respond? Maybe people would use it as a weapon somehow. Squeezles, I'm going to use you in my hypothetical example here as an example of the hypothetically ridiculous, hope you don't mind. So Ginger gets in the rant space and rants about what an awful person Squeezles is, and no one can say anything to Ginger about it because Ginger is just "venting". *sweet innocent never-do-anything-wrong smile* And maybe it would spawn multiple "I'm pissed off" threads, where Squeezles would start her own rant thread saying what a backstabbing weirdo Ginger is.... which then prompts Ginger to add to her own rant thread that Squeezles wears combat boots to bed, which prompts Squeezles to add to her own rant thread that Ginger smells like moldy socks *laugh*

OK, maybe not my brightest of ideas, but I'm putting it out on the table in case someone a little more creative and far-sighted than I can run with it.

And Squeezles, you know it's only ME that wears combat boots to bed...

December 20, 2002
4:02 pm
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Scherza.

Thank you for your very mature response to my posting of the 19-Dec-02.

I'm smiling at the human race, including myself, the whole time that I'm writing this.

You are dead right when you said, " Truth be told, however, you didn't aim this at me and I know it..."

I didn't have you in mind at all. As a matter of fact, I didn't have any one person in mind at all. I had in mind the memory of the many flame wars that have erupted over the time since this site's inception. My memory of the many issues involved have long gone but my memory of the vitriol has not.

It seems to me that the causes of all these flame wars, are 'phantoms' from the past.

(1) Generally speaking people reading the postings of others, myself included, tend to insert negative 'intonations' and negative 'connotations' into the typed words.

(2) I believe that these 'intonations' are negative auditory memories associated with connotations based on parental scripts retained by us as children when 'put downs' were employed by insecure parents in trying to control and manipulate our behavior.

(3) Thus once the 'words' used by an 'offending' poster match the negative parental scripts recorded in our memory, we tend to unconsciously recall the sounds, pitches and volumes used by our parents.

(4) Whammm!!! Instant triggering into full blown recall are all the emotions felt so long ago at the time of the laying down of the memory traces.

(5) Unknowingly, we vent all our pent up negative energies and resentments from the past upon a poster who is staggered by our 'unwarranted' response to his or her seemingly 'innocuous' words.

For a good many years I was a 'boss killer' until I realized that it was my father with whom I had the deap seated problem.

I also had contempt for all women until I realized that it was my mother for whom I had the contempt.

When I finally 'grew up' and went through puberty at the age of 43, I learnt that the world that I 'see' outside of me is a projection from deep inside my psyche.

I am a very passionate person. I ride an 1100 cc V twin Harley look alike. I ballroom dance 2 to 3 times a week and make love just as often without any complaints. šŸ™‚ Yet I write like a dried up old prune - right? You see how inadequate I am at communicating!

Phew! Boy Oh boy do I get plenty of chances to practice what I preach. I have to say constantly to myself -"Piss off dad, you won't put me down or control me any more." and "You're not my mom. You most probably have something useful to say to me." šŸ™‚

We all carry a lot of baggage don't we. Why get angry and fight over it?

I followed the guidelines - I bloody well hope I did anyway!

December 20, 2002
8:20 pm
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Good to read you Tez, as usual, how very articulate. Well presented. Not that you need my validation, just a fan of yours. Merry Christmas to you, and here is to a better new year.

December 20, 2002
9:16 pm
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I guess I'll vote yes. But I think I'd only use it to rant uncontrollably to a blank wall. I wouldn't really want anybody else to read what I put in that area. I know it's probably a programming nightmare, but I guess I'd like a thread only I could access just so I could unload all my shit without having to worry about anybody else judging me.

Wait a tick... I can already do that if I open up word perfect on my own comp...

I don't know. It all sounds interesting, but I fear the responses some people might make to my rants. I can be pretty harsh on myself, others, life, god... and then I get REALLY mean.

December 20, 2002
11:16 pm
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You know silence I don't know why we sometimes care or give a good shit what anyone thinks of us because we can jude and and beat up ourselves just fine with out the help of others. I have kicked my own ass a good few times and sure I will afew more times. Silence really is good to see you back...

December 21, 2002
12:18 am
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Tez: I had to laugh out loud at your last entry...about going through puberty at 43. That means there is still hope for me in the next year! Whoohoo!!

BTW, Tez, isn't "bloody" a really BAD word and isn't it against guidelines to be a potty mouth on your board?

SC: Tez needs a warning, don't you think?! Block him!!!!

****The name "scherza" is the feminization of the Italian word "scherzo" for "joke." It is also a musical term...invented by Baroque composers (1700's) who were tired of pretentious people snoring louding through the end of their long serious musical pieces. They would add a loud, caprious, and whimsical interlude from out of no-where to jolt them out of their chairs! It is a musical practical joke.

OK. I am a lecturer...by profession and by heart. I will shut up now.

šŸ˜‰

December 21, 2002
4:56 am
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WTF is wrong with combat boots? *glares evily at Ginger*

Well since there is still an 'iffy' undertone in whether the 'anger' board is a good idea, why not implement a one, two or three month trial, after which the board process will be removed and either kept as is, modified or dropped altogether. At this stage it's difficult to ascertain whether it is a good idea or not as we have no working model. I tend to think it might be a good idea, but I'd like to see it in practice before I gave the complete thumbs up.

December 21, 2002
12:07 pm
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*grin*

December 21, 2002
8:40 pm
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Does Anxiety cause your lips to go numb?

December 21, 2002
10:21 pm
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beara: yup.

December 21, 2002
10:28 pm
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yes i think it is a great idea because i have a alot of anger and having a borad for it will be really good. love you always Jess

December 21, 2002
11:32 pm
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D'oh...removed = reviewed.

Actually, given my present state of feeling like ripping the head off an animate object, I think that the angry board is a good idea, at least for a trial period.

December 23, 2002
6:11 am
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SC if you decide to put up the borad i would use it and as Squeezle said we should give it a tril run fist to see it get enough responce out of it and see if it was sucesfull. and if everyone fullows it peobaly. we can only try and that is my opionon. love you all Jess

December 26, 2002
7:50 pm
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If we were to have an 'anger' board, then what about a 'sad' board, a 'mourning' board, a 'divorce' board? If it all gets so segmented perhaps we'll all end up back in our little boxes not communicating with anyone who can help cos once again we don't know where to go. Sorry to be cynical.

December 26, 2002
9:21 pm
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But the thing is that some people are really sensitive to any kind of anger, and may mistake it as anger pointed towards them. An alternative would be to try and mention when you are talking about potential "trigger issues" in the thread title, but that's not really reliable. We all remember some insane flame wars going on here.

December 27, 2002
9:47 am
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Everything ever said on this board is always a potential trigger issue for someone...!

This board is kind of a simulation of real life.

I like UKPolly's idea. We can have a Happy board, too! That way, if I am feeling good about something and choose to write about it, I won't offend anyone with my emotional dissonance to their "flow." Then I can rant on the anger board about how no one appreciates my input...because no one is writing on the happy board except me! Then I can write on the sad board about being sad and lonely that no one is writing on the happy board with me.... And then I can watch my head explode from the cognitive dissonance I will be experiencing! Better yet, I can learn to get over my happy mood. I think we need a rascal's board, too...don't you?

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