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How can I keep from betraying the trust of my Grandson?
November 28, 2014
8:03 pm
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November 28, 2014
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My 13 year old grandson told me recently (in confidence) that he thinks his mom  (my 37 year old daughter) drinks too much. I asked him why he thinks that. He said she drinks every night. I haven't told her about this and, coincidentally. she recently told me she unwinds in the evening "by having a couple beers".

I know she has a liberal attitude about smoking pot and smokes it on occasion. To my knowledge, she's only done this when her son is away from home with her ex. She knows I'm dead set against her smoking pot anytime. Alcohol and substance abuse runs in our family.

I believe she drinks alcohol more than she lets on. My daughter recently told me that my grandson has been doing very poorly in school. He's not doing his homework and has hid reports from school that he is failing. She's caught my grandson lying which is totally out of character for him. My daughter contacted the school and is working with the child study team (which is going to include a child counselor) extensively to handle/try to get to the root of my grandson's failing grades. He's told his mom that he's "dumb"...thus the failing grades. He's been around many family members who were drunk...he's experienced the loss of my daughter's boyfriend who was run over and killed two years ago. His dad, grandmom, uncle, and aunt have had/still have alcohol/drug addiction issues. My grandson has seen way to much at his young age. To make things worse, he talks with my other grandson (who has behavioral/emotional issues) either over the phone or while playing video games with him (they live many miles apart). 

Should I talk with my daughter about what my grandson told me in confidence (he trusts my explicitly)? Of the family members who see my grandson fairly regularly I'M THE ONLY ONE WHO DOESN'T HAVE ADDICTIONS ISSUES. Can someone suggest another way I can do something to bring this problem to a head?

You should know that my grandson has always been a really good kid. He has never gotten into trouble. I also truly believe he's not experieriencing substance abuse issues himself. I've been around alcoholics since I was a child...my parents were alcoholics. I've lost several family members to alcohol and drugs. I am soo sick of it. I thank God that I am not an addict.

Please, if anyone has some sound advice to give I'm "all ears". Thank you for your time and interest.   Steve

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