Relationship Self-Help

Romantic relationships can be one of the most fulfilling, joyful experiences of our lives. However, relationships have their ups and downs, and they take lots of hard work and commitment to be truly successful. All relationships, even very healthy and loving ones, need some self-help from time to time. If you fear your relationship is not healthy for different reasons such as emotional, verbal, or physical abuse, it's urgently important to remove yourself from that relationship. Taking the interest to improve your romantic bond is a good sign that your relationship is moving toward a brighter future.
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Relationship Self-Help – continued…

How to Implement Relationship Self-Help

There are a large number of ways to give any relationship the boost it needs. Depending on the state of the relationship, the needs can be more or less drastic. However, no matter the situation, it’s always important to keep in mind open communication, fairness, unconditional love and acceptance, and trust.

There are many different elements to romantic relationships including friendship, excitement, emotional stability, joy, and sexual intimacy. Simply taking the initiative to have a good conversation every day where each partner can communicate and be heard and cared about is very important. Taking an interest in what your partner has to say, how they feel, and what they think, shows a desire to be close and connected.

Taking time out of your life to go on a date or spend time together is also very important to the success of any relationship. A date doesn’t need to be a lavish or expensive dinner out; it can be as simple as a frozen pizza and Netflix at home. The point isn’t necessarily what you do, it’s that you enjoy doing it and are able to spend quality time together.

Being able to speak your mind to your partner is absolutely crucial in any relationship. If there is a conflict, it’s important that you are both able to resolve it with arguing. Don’t let tension and resentments build up that will eventually cause greater problems down the road. Using calm, non-accusatory tones when speaking about problems helps communication run more smoothly.

What is Relationship Self-Help?

Following the example of other successful, happy couples can help your relationships. However, you should not get caught up in comparing your relationship to others because every relationship is different and unique. There are many books on the market regarding enhancing relationship bonds, sexual satisfaction, and ideas to create a sense of “newness” in your relationship, that may also help.

It is extremely important for you to be honest with yourself and others about your relationship if it is abusive, violent, or painful. Love has its ups and downs, but it shouldn’t drag you down constantly or cause you to feel regular sadness. It is difficult, but if you are experiencing relationship abuse, remove yourself immediately. Also, if you haven’t yet to become sexually intimate and you don’t want to, don’t allow your partner to force you or talk you into something you’re not comfortable with. Having patience, understanding, and willingness to create a strong bond before sex can make for a more successful and fulfilling relationship.

Relationship Self-Help Links, Resources and Websites

  • has this webpage to use as advice for healthy and happy relationships. Countless tips, tools and links are available for your use.
  • This article from outlines “Emotionally Intelligent Communication” for improving relationships. Different chapters, or articles are available for reading and learning more about effective relationship help.
  • Being in a healthy relationship is what we all yearn for. If you’re unsure if your relationship is healthy or unhealthy, or you just want to find out more about how to build healthy relationships, review this webpage from
  • If you’re curious about sexual health in relationships and how to stay safe, please visit the American Social Health Association for more information.
  • For a comprehensive list of what to look for in a healthy relationship, review this page from Caltech Health Education.

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