cowering behind a team of lies and insincere acts i wonder what i'll be like in the future when everyone else is all grown up and i'm still just faking my way thru life not only lying to those i care about but also to myself. visions of a recluse sitting quietly within the shade of and ancient tree with nothing but her thoughts to surround her and breathe in like air as she takes up the energy of both the soft earth beneath her and the truth that hides inside her soul as she curls up on the ground to cry herself to sleep one last time. I lost my innocence the first time i denied what i really feel and now i find comfort in the space of a certain degree of personal ignorance. nightmares of fulfillment and dreams of everlasting inner turmoil wake me in the night and follow me...