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Why do people continue to say I am mean, rude and overbearing?

UserPost

7:42 pm
April 10, 2010


chelonia mydas

Member

posts 7

Hi Friends,

This is probably just a petty concern but it is eating away at my brain right now and I'm hoping that by sharing it here, I can let it go and get some perspective.

Prior to the current company I work for I had very few complaints from coworkers, supervisors or customers about how I worked with them. Many of the compliants that I did have centered around the fact that I enforced policies and procedures. Most of the time I was the one who was assigned to work with the difficult people because of my patience and tact in dealing with them.

Over the past several years I have had several complaints filed against me for being rude, condescending and mean. Most, if not all of these complaints, have been tied back to a small core group of women who have for years now tried to get me fired by a variety of tactics.

I have posted on here before about them. Some of it was me needing to grow from my mistakes (such as sending a strong email to one of them that corrected their actions when I was not their supervisor) but much of it was just slander (such as the persistant rumors that I'm sleeping with my boss as well as attributing damaging comments to me that I never said). Thoughtout all this, I have held my ground and continued to be the best person I could. Admitting to my mistakes when I knew them and working to correct them and then ignoring the rest of the BS and just hope that those that really matter will eventually see the truth.

I think some of the people in higher management were starting to see the situation for what it really is. Over the past year two of the three ladies have moved on to other positions, one has taken a government job and the other has moved to a regional position. Since they have left, the rumors have subsided significantly and the only complaints have only come from the only person left working with me from this group. Because of this, she is on a performance improvement plan.

Until today everyone had pretty much accepted that the problems were on their way to being resolved.

Well I've had another complaint filed against me. I am attending a workshop this weekend and the lady at the hotel who provided lunches said I was rude and in her face because she gave away my vegetarian lunch and I had nothing to eat. I don't think I was, I did ask questions to figure out what happened and to find out if vegetarian meals were going to be provided for the other two days of the workshop. I wasn't hungry and had enough food in my bag for lunch (I've gotten used to not having vegetarian meals provided by this organization). It wasn't a big deal to me and I just wanted to know more for planning the other two days of the workshop. There was one other person around during this encounter and she said that the part of our interaction she was that the hotel lady seemed rude but I was professional, but she noted that she left about 2 minutes into the discussion.

The lunch lady turns out to be friends with the executive assistant to the Director of the organization I work for. This woman is friends with one of the group of mean ladies, and has heard about how rude I am so she made sure it got blown out of proportion. Because of this, and also probably because they are pissed at me for turning the research station into a refugee camp, my regional manager pulled me out of the workshop to do a counseling session about this and noted that it has been a chronic issue with me and now that the lunch lady from the hotel has also had issues that he doesn't see a connection to this other group so is now questioning if it is really me and has been me all along.

About 2 years ago when there was a big push about me being mean, rigid and overbearing I went to many of my coworkers and supervisors and asked for honest feedback about my people skills. Most of them associated with this group agreed that I was rude and mean but when asked for details couldn't provide a single specific example of a time when I was. Only one person was able to give me one example of when she was yelling at someone in a meeting and I told her to be quiet and wouldn't let her say anything for the remainder of the meeting because I would just interrupt wheneven she tried to speak. I even asked them to note any examples they encountered in the future and 2 years later have yet to have anyone stop me and say "Chel, you were rude when you…"

So after dinner I go up to the hotel lady and confront her about this. I apologized for offending her. She said I was rude and offensive, so I asked her for the specific things I did that were rude so I could learn from this and not repeat it. She said that there wasn't really anything to change for the future, she understood that I was upset because I didn't get my lunch. I explained that I wasn't upset which is why it is important for me to understand what I did because I don't think I was rude at all. I also explained that because of her report I was in trouble. Her only comment was that I should have thought about that before I got all uppity about having a vegetarian meal. I was like what???? and then I really did start to feel upset with her so just thanked her for her time and walked off.

So I'm kinda wanting to dismiss it because I think it might be related to being different and/or to this group of mean ladies. But I also worry that I'm using that as an excuse to not fix my issues of being rude. But then I think I've tried to address it but no one can provide me with examples and I don't see it myself, so what can I fix? Just doubt every interaction I have with someone that I might be rude and not realize it?

So this is such a small thing but its feels so giant right now. Please help provide some perspective. Am I being self serving by just letting it go so I don't have to deal with working through being rude? Or is this just BS that I should just let go?

I wonder how can I walk through drug cartel road blocks and not bat an eye but then the lunch lady thinks I'm rude and I'm just a mess. What is wrong with me?

12:14 am
April 11, 2010


onlyboringontheoutside

New Member

posts -1

I personally don't think anything is wrong with you… but then again, I'm a strong willed female in the workplace myself, and I work with a bunch of other strong willed (and frankly brilliant) females. They have supreme self confidence, and I enjoy the debates we have, lots of fist pounding on the table, but it's never personal.

These women you are working with sound like they don't know how to deal with your style, and the idea that someone might (gasp) ask for honest feedback is probably very foreign to them. I am sorry that they are throwing their insecurities back at you and making you uncomfortable, but that's what it sounds like is happening.

The vegetarianism may be a factor. It makes some people uncomfortable (again, their problem), but if you are to inquire a peep about a vegetarian meal, automatically you will be considered a self-entitled whiner by some. All you can do is laugh and shrug it off.

Confidence and assertiveness is commonly confused for rudeness by those who lack those positive characteristics. It's sad, really. I do wish for you that you could meet a few people who share your perspectives on life and could provide you safe haven when the crazy talk starts from these other misguided souls!

((Chel))

2:30 am
April 11, 2010


chelonia mydas

Member

posts 7

Thanks for posting OBOTO.

I do often wonder if a lot of it is because I'm a woman who stands up, speaks up and gets things done. Less than 15% of the people in my position in this organization are women, so they are not used to it. Combine that with being stationed in rural Mexico and then being vegetarian, non-drinker, non-smoker, non-christian, 30something divorced lady with no kids and no desire to have a boyfriend or children. I shouldn't be surprised or hurt when they don't understand me. I just want to be sure that I'm not missing anything by assuming that is what it is. Thanks for providing an outside point of view.

Your insites have helped me release this. Thank you. (((OBOTO)))

2:40 am
April 11, 2010


_anonymous

Member

posts 8

All of this complaining is a sign of the times.

I went to a restaurant today and the waitress was in tears. All because her step son was threatening to complain about her.

Just because someone complains doesn't necessarily mean you did something wrong.

If you were supposed to have a vegetarian meal and didn't get one, it sounds to me like the person who gave your lunch away made the mistake.

8:47 am
April 11, 2010


BAREFOOTGIRL

New Member

posts -1

I am sorry Mydas…gosh i have been in this position my entire life, its always a group of women who band together to try to hurt me, make me cry and etc…

Women as a group and I believe where you are is not helping as the culture of that is what it is and your not part of that, your infact prolly quite opposite to who they are and that prolly bothers them ALOT.

Esp if they feel deep down that they could never be WHO you are…its a part of a group dymnamic I had seen and experienced my entire life. That is one reason I try to keep my friendships one on one, cause even in my group of friends I sense it.

Now most of the time its not intentional but its a primal thing and in your case, as I had experienced in the workplace when young, thin and very insecure at the same time, a bad recipe as well, women will team up and chew up, spit you out and then BLAME you for it, as that is what the rude part is all bout.

I am sorry, I pretty much isolate myself these days, not into the PTA or things like that, cause that is where they are…(((HUGS!)))

8:51 am
April 11, 2010


BAREFOOTGIRL

New Member

posts -1

one more note, if it makes you feel any better Mydas, you were the LAST person on this site I thought wrote this thread! I had always seen you conduct your with much grace and class on this site, always…I seriously doubt its you…enjoy your day:)

8:54 am
April 11, 2010


BAREFOOTGIRL

New Member

posts -1

I also want to say goodbye too, I am pretty much done here, I have too much on my plate these days to be online, but I wanted to say a speacial goodbye to you, take care:) your be ok…

8:57 am
April 11, 2010


Bitsy

Member

posts 71

Chelonia, my experience has been that tow women can work together quite nicely, you add the third or more and they trurn into bitches and there is always a scapegoat. Usually that was me.

I am not a cultural anthropologist so I don't know if what I am about to say has any merit or not. You are working in Mexico, you are a white woman, and you are on equal footing with their men. My observation of Hispanic/Latina culture is that the women appear to be subserviant. You are not subservient to their men, in fact in some cases you may actually be their men's boss. I don't think it is you so much as it is WHO you are. American White Woman Boss.

What I have found to work for me is
to divide and conquer. I try my best to kill them with kindness. Individually they don't hate you as a group they do. It is sort of reverse racism. Maybe you could focus on this one woman who is left in your department. When you bake muffins, bring her one…no one else in the department or if you bring them for the whole department seek her out and hand deliver hers…"I really wanted you to have this muffin I baked". I KNOW it sounds bassackwards to what you really want and deserve but sometimes you have to fall back and play their silly little reindeer games.

Personally? I think you ROCK!!!!

Bitsy

10:12 am
April 11, 2010


Lillabit

New Member

posts -1

gosh i think if i was in the middle of drug cartel wars i would be extra polite. to not be overbearing. in the least. its easier to be rude to someone who pretty sure doesnt have a gun. not that you are. but still. no comparison to the veg plate lady.

its not easy to be a superviser. your the middle man. the fall guy. u inforce the policies you didmt' write. u wont have friends. if u have supervisers ask for advice in management n listen to their suggestions. they have to handle each complaint even if its the same person over and over. or for the same thing over and over. or they could get sued. have you asked your supervisor for guidance about being a leader? sometimes its all in th approach. like if u publicly shut someone up by interrupting them every time they talk there are witnesses. a better approach might be to at least pretend to consider what they are saying then address it privatley. show that person respect even if you dont feel respected. rise above it. if you act the same that they do then no one wins n u arent leading by example. thats my opinion. i have been in leadership positions before. i hated it. u walk a tightrope. every one claims abuse now. that's the trend these days. the thing that i learned is that just because i am in a leadership position doesn't mean i am above reproach or that i cant learn something. i learned more from the people i didnt liek than the ones i did. women are catty though n meaner in packs. they have long memories

11:49 am
April 11, 2010


chelonia mydas

Member

posts 7

Destiny, Barefoot, Bitsy and Lillabit,

After reading this I'm feeling much better about this whole thing.

Thank you for your feedback and point of view. It is greatly appreciated and helps me get a much better grasp of the situation and deal with the reality of it instead of continuing to spin a bunch of fictional self-hating thoughts in my head. Your thoughts have been a big help in accepting what I am responsible for and releasing the rest.

The mean ladies from work are all from the US, but yes a group of women at work from any culture can be a very ugly thing. They are probably acting the way they are because they know the system and the right words to use to get the folks higher up to take action.

Thank you for sharing your experiences, its helps me feel less alone in this and helps me realize that there isn't anything wrong with me… its just people being people.

I'll see what I can do about killing this last one with kindness. I'll have to be careful with that though, because I'm now her supervisor and in the middle of a performance improvement plan with a possible outcome being her termination. I was hoping with the temp reassignements I would get away from her, but because of her performance issues, we have to be transferred together. I've already tried to make the case that she might do better under someone else and we should give her that opportunity. But the regional manager won't allow it. I think he wants her gone and doesn't want to give her any chance to succeed, which really sucks. Yes she is a manipulative bitch, but if she can work well under someone else, why not let her? But his point is that I can't transfer my problem to someone else. I think she is my problem because she has been influenced by the mean lady group, but its not my decision to make, so I'll just have to enforce it as best as I can.

Supervision is like a tightrope, one slip and you fall to the ground. Thanks everyone for being my harness and helping me catch myself before I fall.

There is a whole other group of women that are the wives, mothers, sisters of the men I supervise that have issues with me. Many are offended and upset, some are supportive and have begun to evaluate their situation and new found potential. I understand and accept the dynamics of being La Jefa/a lady boss in Mexico. Its not easy there either, which could be another contributing factor to my insecurities with this particular situation… I really don't have many people that think well of me. Which makes your support all that much more important.

The drug cartels are an entirely different issue here too. I haven't dealt with them directly, except to go through checkpoints that could be military or cartel. Its hard to know the difference, you pay a bribe either way to men in uniform with very large rifles. I've essentially shut down the station to avoid any confrontation with the cartels. Most of the foreign folks have returned to the US for other assignements.

But without all this I guess life would be boring and stagnant with little to learn and grow from. This is certainly giving me opportunity to grow and become a stronger, better person. Thank you for your light and insight. You all are very special people and I feel so blessed to have you around.

11:53 am
April 11, 2010


chelonia mydas

Member

posts 7

Barefoot,

A special post to say good bye to you too. I'm glad that you have been here and are now branching out into other things.

You will be greatly missed and I have appreciated your posts and friendship. Please feel free to stop by the coffeehouse from time to time to say hi if you want to. I understand and respect if you have to completely move on from this site, but know that the invitation is always there.

Big goodbye hugs from Chelonia mydas

12:21 pm
April 11, 2010


Hepburn

Los Angeles, California

Member

posts 104

Hi Chelonia,

Interesting, I just had a conversation about this with my sister the other day. She tends to run into situations like this too.

My sister is a "get it done" type of person. She's very honest and passionate about her work, her charities and her beliefs. Most times because of the type of people she has to be around, they don't have the same passion as she does. So most times her "way" of doing things gets translated into rudeness or bitchiness.

She too had complaints against her. She ended up getting "fired" from the animal shelter where she volunteered! People didn't like her "stirring" things up. Which translates to she got things done that THEY should have taken care of and didn't. She ended up starting her own animal rescue. But my sister just HAS to say something, if she feels it, and I think most times that's what got her in "trouble". She struggles with diplomacy.

It really comes down to people owning their responsibilities. And I'm finding that's becoming an epidemic.

I like the idea of killing them with kindness. Or just ignoring them and let the universe deal with them. Sounds like "people" are starting to "see" what's going on anyway. The truth comes out eventually. After all you can't control them right? YA GOTTA BE YOU! And personally I think you're GREAT!

Learning how to deal with the "pack" mentality, especially with WOMEN can be tricky. Treat them like the drug cartel! lol Give'em a wide berth.

3:34 pm
April 11, 2010


_anonymous

Member

posts 8

chelonia mydas- you sound like a true warrior!

7:45 pm
April 11, 2010


CAMER

Member

posts 100

chelonia…i remember back in the day when you talked about that boss who used to give you problems…then YOU were promoted!! I guess life is crazy, yes, people bitch and complain and say this and that….we cannot keep the world happy. I know that from you posting here, you are a warm, sincere, down to earth type of gal, and that means the most. Again, we cannot keep the world happy, as long as you are happy that is what matters the most.

And being in the Customer Service industry, i know for a fact, i've dealt with the meanest, nastiest people, but do not take it personally, cuz as much as you try, and make the customer #1, it does not matter, sometimes people are just not happy or are not having a good day.

You are a wonderful person Chelonia!! don't ever forget that!!

4:39 pm
April 12, 2010


truthBtold

New Member

posts -1

Chelonia,

When first tapping on this thread – you were the last person I would had ever thought of to start it.

I think that it is safe to say that after quite a bit of time getting to know you on these threads, (over the years now?)what with your passion towards animals for one, it seems inconceivable to me that you continue to expereince these difficulties.

I think that you just might be all caught up in a very corrupt system ~ where 'mum' is the word and the mere thought of you wanting to get to the bottom of it all seems to elicit all kinds of fears in others and they point to you as a scapegoat rather than really taking a hard look at the reall issues and dynamics going on.

Does that sound about right to you?

Girlfriend, maybe you just need to come back to the states? Corrupt as it maybe – maybe less corrupt than where you are, all things considered.

Breaks my heart truly, to see you continuely subjected to such heartless and mean treatment.

I fancy myself to be a pretty darned good judgement of character….and in all the time that I have known you thru these threads, it just doesn"t add up to me~!

((((Chelonia)))))

5:22 pm
April 12, 2010


darkeyes

Member

posts 30

((chelonia)))your one of the best! if in a job situation you are the boss, no one likes to be told what to do, its just a ego issiue, in a personal situation and i only kno in how you have treated me, and thats been in the most positive kind and helpfull way always..i see you have great confidence and self-worth and let no one take that away from you…let people's issiues with them and you'l kno always if what you do and say is right or wrong!!be gentle on yourself you only deserve the best….hugs chelonia…

8:27 pm
April 12, 2010


lovetocrochet

New Member

posts -1

This sounds like an ugly case of "office politics." I hate this kind of stuff and don't understand it… and it has a domino effect. It's like as soon as one person complains and you're not able to or allowed to defend yourself the subsequent stuff just topples one after the other.

You certainly don't seem like the kind of person who's rude and overbearing to me. I really hope this gets cleared up :-(

10:16 pm
April 12, 2010


chelonia mydas

Member

posts 7

Thank you for your continued support, I really need it.

There was another incident today. This time it was with one of the interns that I'm supervising on my temporary assignment. He was at part of the workshop this weekend, and surprise of all surprises, he had lunch with Connie, the last of the mean lady pack that works directly with me. (Connie is also the one that is on a performance improvement plan)

Until today he and I got along great and he has been one of my favorite interns in the program.

He asked to speak to me with another person present because he was afraid I would get "out of hand" if he spoke to me alone. When I asked what he meant by that, he said that I was mean to him on the phone yesterday and he is no longer comfortable dealing with me alone. When I asked for specifics on what was so horrible, he just noted that I made him feel bad and he has been really mad at the situation ever since.

He is a good worker who is dedicated to what we do, but he likes to party and has has a history of calling in sick, especially on Saturday and Sunday. In many cases when he is told he is the only researcher on duty and we will have to cancel if he doesn't come in, he will have a miraculous recovery and be in to work within half hour of his scheduled time.

I received another such call yesterday and questioned him about it, noting that in his original message he mentioned that it was OK to be sick today because another researcher was going to be there and he had already called to confirm that. I pointed out that it didn't matter who else was working, if he was calling me it was because he had no other options and was truely too sick to work, irregardless of who was there or not. I told him to take the day off if he was really sick, but he was needed at work if he wasn't.

He took offense to this and showed up today with a doctor's note all hurt and offended that I would dare question him or his illness. We talked it through and it ended on a good note.

I don't know what else to do, except just continue to do my best and be the nicest person but still do my job.

This is in Texas, so its not like I'm in Mexico anymore.

Yes this organization is very much a good ole boy place to work, but I don't know of anyplace that doesn't have issues. At least here I have a paycheck and I don't think I will get fired because there are so many others who are far worse that are still here. Of course if I am seen as a problem or someone that stirs things because I get the job done when other don't/won't, that could change things.

I'm trying to get another job with another company, but its very difficult to find work in my field, especially since I'm not up on much of the software needed to get hired on as a new person with another organization. My resume is out there, but no one is calling. And for now its probably best I'm where I am. I think they would remove the refugees from the research station if it weren't for me. They are pretty pissed that I did that, but it was the right thing to do if you look at it from a bigger picture than just the best interests of the orgainization.

Thanks for continuing to listen to my venting and most especially thanks for keeping me from wigging out about something that is beyond my control. Maybe this is suppose to help me learn to beleive in myself so strongly that the world can think differently and I will still know who I am and what I stand for. Thank you for playing a big role in helping me stay strong and be able to see through this crazy smokescreen that is being created by the mean lady pack.

10:40 pm
April 12, 2010


lovetocrochet

New Member

posts -1

Oh no, I'm sorry the intern's now in on it! Even if his thing was an isolated incident unrelated to the others that is so aggravating!

We're finally still starting to thaw out of this rotten economy but it's slow coming and the job market is still at a crawl. So that's probably why people aren't nibbling at your resume.

Are there training classes that the company would be willing to pay for you to take so you can get up to speed on the software?

11:15 am
April 14, 2010


_anonymous

Member

posts 8

chelonia mydas- From what you say it sounds like the terms of the employees conduct would be found in the employee handbook. With an employee like that I would bring a witness of my own and review the employee handbook as far as how many sick days an employee is allowed in a certain period of time, as well as how much notice they need to give when they are calling in sick.

If he is violating this policy then I would imagine that there must be a disciplinary policy you could follow.

He said he was hurt and offended because you exercised your authority by asking for a doctors note? You are not responsible for his feelings. You could have pointed out that this was about complying with the companies policy not about his feelings.

This stuff goes on everywhere. In my line of work I just say same circus, different tent.

12:22 pm
April 14, 2010


Hepburn

Los Angeles, California

Member

posts 104

Hi Chelonia,

In my line of work an "intern" does not get paid. They are there to learn. So basically they are "volunteering". Wondering if this is so in your industry?

12:47 pm
April 14, 2010


gottobetrue

New Member

posts -1

Chelonia, my guess is he wants to keep his job and will do anything to divert attention from his recurring "illnesses". If you're the bad guy, no one will notice his absences, they'll focus on you, and if he knows already that you've had problems with this (judging by his lunching with Connie, he may), he'll push that button.

Do you have documentation of his days out and tardiness? I had a contractor who pulled this all the time. If it wasn't illness, it was a missed train. He also "forgot" to return two CDs of software he needed for his work. I didn't keep great records of him being out, just emails and voicemails from him, so when I hired another contractor later, and she started pulling the same tricks, I started to look bad when I wanted to let her go – she also conspired with another co-worker to make it look like I fired everyone I hired for no reason (not true, once my company finally started letting me administer a test in the interview process I was able to weed out the incompetent workers and hire some really good people), so it was a struggle, but once I started keeping better incident records, the heat moved off me and onto the troublemakers.

My advice is to keep as cool a head as possible, especially when your reputation is in question. It's really tough, believe me, I've been there. When someone is out to get you, you start to feel crazy. Hang in there!

3:37 pm
April 14, 2010


chelonia mydas

Member

posts 7

Thanks for your continued support.

We have both paid and unpaid internships. He is one of the paid ones. He is still within his alloted sick leave, so that's not a factor yet.

Its not so much the incident with calling in sick when you are not. I deal with that all the time. Its the fact that Connie seems to be turning others against me in a very quick fashion. She is very charismatic and charming. She is looks good for her age uses this to her advantage, especially with the older men in upper management.

Yes this has been going on for years now and I'm just feeling very crazy and worn down by it all. But posting here and reading what y'all share has helped ALOT. Its so easy to get caught up in the drama and feelings of it all and forget that its really just people being people and looking out for their best interests at all costs to others. We all have our issues and they are no exception. Its just seeing it for what it is and reacting to it in the best way possible to keeps things going as smooth and harmonously as possible that is the constant struggle.

8:11 pm
April 14, 2010


_anonymous

Member

posts 8

chelonia mydas- From what you say it sounds like you think that "Connie" has poisoned the waters for you so to speak. Once that happens it can become a very difficult situation to deal with.

12:00 am
September 4, 2010


chelonia mydas

Member

posts 7

I
have pulled up this old thread because it is happening AGAIN.
UUUURRRRRRGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!

They are doing a
full scale investigation at work now to evaluate the management
practices of the station. Connie just transferred 4 weeks ago to
another job in another state (Yeah) and I thought my troubles were
over. But they are not.

My manager told me
that they are sending in a special task force next week to conduct
a managers review since the current regional manager has failed to
find anything wrong with me during all of his previous
investigations and the complaints continue to come their way. They
are responding to a number of employee complaints from 3-4 months
ago and it has taken them this long to monitor me and assemble this
task force. He wasn't allowed to say anything more to me about it
becuase one of the people who filed is scared that there will be
retaliation. Connie has a history of using alarming accusations to
get people to take action on her behalf. But I also think that this
was filed when I was still a manager for the research station in
Mexico that I chose to evacuate in response to the increased cartel
violence in the area.

I have talked to a
lawyer who specializes in employee relations and he didn't see any
basis for termination or even disciplinary action. At this point
all I should get is a notification and improvement plan at best,
especially since I've only been in my new job for 3 months and the
complaints are based on complaints from the previous
position.

I'm so frustrated
with this whole situation. I've done nothing wrong, but because
these few women who are jealous, insecure and unable to do their
jobs, are doing all they can to take me out and continue to
perpetuate horrible lies and pass it off as my reputation. And the
worst part is that they seem to be succeeding.

But I need to
remember that my reputation is based on what this groups wishes I
was, its not a reflection of who I really am. Those who work with
me on a regular bases and are doing their jobs do not have these
troubles. Only those who do not have frequent contact with me or
who are not doing their jobs have issues with me and jump on the
mean lady bandwagon.

I'm trying to view
this investigation as my chance to put all this behind me, either
because I get cleared by an outside team of people who say this is
BS, or because I give up and leave.

Since Connie left
I have seen the team progres leaps and bounds in getting along and
comming together. I hate that they will have to endure an
investigation. And how does it look for me to only be here 3 months
and they are already investigating me? How is that going to help
support my position as asst. manager, especially since I had to
take a demotion when I refused to return to my manager job in
Mexico.

This just sucks
and I need to vent. I have to calm down and get this all
straightened out in my head before the weekend is over so they can
see me for who I am. I have 2 days to work through all the years of
frustration and built up resentment that this group of bitches has
caused. The investigative team has to see that I am not frustrated,
upset, mean, angry or capable of the things this stupid group of
meanies claims I am.

They still have
influence over so many people. Some of our regional level research
evaluators have major attitude against me and continue to say that
I am mean and so rude that they refuse to work with me. These are
people who have have less than 3 interactions with me a piece in
teh 18 months we have been working together! They don't know ME,
they just know what the bitches have said about me and beleive it
to be the truth. But the regional manager is so beleiving that I
have major attitude issues that he has told my manager that these
others don't have to work with me at all eventhough that is one of
the main functions of my job now.

I love my job, I
love the purpose of what I do and that my work is saving endangered
habitats and wildlife. It is my childhood dream come true. I love
the people I work with directly, especially since Connie is gone. I
just hate all the haters that are causing this disruption. But
since they are also the ass kissers, nothing will ever happen to
them. They will continue kissing ass and the higher ups will
continue to use them whenever they need an ego boost.

I hold the line,
do the right thing even when the right thing isn't the easy thing
to do. I stand up for what I beleive in and speak up when things
are not in favor of our mission. I don't drink, which is a big
thing, when you are dealing with folks who like to share beers
while reviewing the latest research papers. Because of this I will
never fit in. But I'm OK with that, because I'm not here to fit,
I'm here to make a difference. And I'm able to do more by following
what is in the greater good than by caving in to the popular
vote.

Just sucks and I'm
tired of it.

Thanks for reading
my vent. It feels good to just let it out and have someone just
acknowledge it for what it is.


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