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What does it mean when you sleep over at their house?

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9:42 pm
July 4, 2005


chickyfighter

New Member

posts -1

I was reading a thread and someone sparked a question in me that I wanted to know. Do men not allow their partner to stay overnight all the time? I mean even when the relationship is not a comitted one isn't that to be expected to stay all night??

9:51 pm
July 4, 2005


Anonymous

New Member

posts -1

Tough question… I know the guy I'm now dating slept in a twin bed until he was 32 for just that reason. He didn't have to have anyone stay over night.

He wasn't interested in personal relationships.

I'm pleased to say that after we had been together a few months he bought a queen bed.

So to me. If you're sleeping with him, but not staying over night, he's not interested in a "relationship".

But I'm no authority… anyone else have a different opinion??

10:30 pm
July 4, 2005


spicegirl2005

New Member

posts -1

I agree – If he does not want you to stay over – he does not think you are in a relationship. Personally when I first got together with my ex..I never wanted to sleep over because I didn't want to get close to him so I would always go home. It was a fear of being vulnerable and getting hurt..I got over that – but the reason was just that.

10:46 pm
July 4, 2005


luv2luvher

New Member

posts -1

Hmmm… Male prospective… Interesting… Everyone women I have been with (not many I can count on my two hands).(TMI) sorry, but back to point, I or them always stayed the night. But me I am a relationship kind of guy. I don't just sleep with women for pleasure. I won't sleep with someone unless there is intention of possibly turning into a relationship. I don't know if this is on point or what the question is asking. If a women is in my bed and staying the night, I would hope it was because they felt comfortable with me and had the thought of possible commitment and relationship in mind…
Just my thoughts..
Much Luv

11:17 pm
July 4, 2005


sdesigns

Member

posts 30

Hmmm…Interesting. Well once I was seeing a guy that wouldn't have sex w/ me unless I did stay. To him that was all part of it. And at the end of my last relationship, my ex would get out of bed and go home to his computer afterwards. When I complained, he asked "What's with this spending the night thing?" Well after spending the night together almost every night for a year, I wondered what's with this NOT spending the night thing. I guess he got what he wanted so he left. things went downhill in a hurry.

If its someone I like then I would want to spend the night with them. Like icing on the cake.

5:49 am
July 5, 2005


revelation

New Member

posts -1

Ah c'mon lads….this is an easy one!
When a guy is into you, he'll want to spend as much time as possible with you, he'll want to hold you close all night and he'll just love it when you say you'll stay. If he doesn't want you to stay….unless its a really valid reason (Like…he lives with his parents or something!!) then chances are he's not that into you.

1:02 am
July 6, 2005


chickyfighter

New Member

posts -1

Well, that confuses me more,at leat w/this one person. I always spent the night w/S and we never had a "relationship", in fact that brings me to another burning question. He is overseas, left me the keys to his place, I am beginning to thik maybe he did that to keep me there while he is gone, just enough but w/o comittment. Granted I am scared of that "committment" word, but I would not mind monogomy from him…I think. Again, thanks alot for your thoughts, I need them right now. :)

5:57 am
July 6, 2005


Regret

New Member

posts -1

chickyfighter,
That is a difficult one. I believe that people are different and have to be assessed on an individual basis. However, there are some common trends that helps to point out whether you are in a monogamous relationship or not. I used to sleep over a lot with my ex boyfriend. I assumed that meant we were in a (monogamous)relationship. I was wrong as later events proved. There were times we stayed in his mom's guest house because his office was close by. I found out that those times were times where he had received a call letting him know that the other girl was at his place etc.
I am in a new relationship and this one is also into sleep overs. The difference between these two men is that this one would beg me to stay over even if we don't make love at the end of the day. The other one would not hear of sleeping in the same bed if i was in my period. This one rubs my back and gets me teas. Infact, he insists i sleep over in those times so he can take care of me. Infact, after sleeping over for about four days in a row without us bonking, i felt something was wrong until he told me he wanted me to know he wants the closeness, the warmth etc when i sleep over. According to him, sex can be had any time so it is not about that when a woman sleeps over.(and this is the guy who I had doubts about from the begining- I thought it was just a sex story).
So, staying over does not necessarily mean he is all that into you although I don't know if not asking you to stay over means the same.
He left you with the keys to his apartment while he is away. It speaks volumes. If you don't feel close to someone, you don't give them keys to your place in your absence. I mean, you could search through his whole place and find "incriminating" stuff in his absence. I am learning to understand men but I think although you don't have a "relationship", it seems you have most of the ingredients that make up a relationship. It will come.All in all, I don't think sleeping over equals anything generally. You have to look at it in conjunction with other things.

8:13 am
July 6, 2005


chickyfighter

New Member

posts -1

Regret, thanks oh so much. I am willing to admit that I have allowed love into my heart for S, but I also know that we had an open relationship, although I was monogomous in the having sex part. I have seen change for the better since we met esp. now that he is gone, but I don't want to hold on to anything that is not factual b/c we sometimes tend to rationalize to hold on. I want to believe that God made us 4 each other, but only he has the last word, and I do trust his will is best 4 all in the long run. He knows my heart, so I am going to rest and leave this up to him, I need to peace. Thanks again, and I am so glad that you have a great guy w/you! You are so blessed. Have a wonderful peaceful day!

9:52 am
July 6, 2005


Regret

New Member

posts -1

Chicky, you said it all so well. Just a few things.They helped me and I hope that they help shed some light for you too. When I started seeing this new guy, it felt fantastic. He courted me in the true sense of the word etc and made me feel like a very special part of him. Then one day, we take a walk, buy icecream and he takes me to this park and says "I have something to tell you". I go like ok, shoot-butterlies fluttering all over my stomach. Then he says to me "I care a great deal about you but I know you will have to leave soon. So please don't fall in love with me and I won't fall in love with you. I will be there for you and try to help make you as happy as possible but we should not fall in love". My first reaction was F**k off but I had gotten so drawn to him that I could just not imagine life without him. I agreed to his terms and guareded my heart. But i guess you have to be a calculating sinister person to be with someone all the time and manage to draw the lines. I fell in love with him and told him. He was a jerk, I cried and swore I would never tell him i love him again. Time passed. I tried to be myself etc. To cut a long story short, he is the one who wants a monogamous relationship now. He is the one who goes about telling people I am his girlfriend when in the begining, he insisted we tell people we were special friends. Two sundays back, he came to my house to meet the people I live with and got officially introduced as my boyfriend. It is true that I am leaving in six months but he decided he would come over next year to spend summer with me and last week, he said to me, "who knows, perhaps next year august, the timing might just be right".He tells me I am the best thing that happened to him this year. I nurture no hope beyond today because of other issues ( I raised this on a different thread. )I just raised this to let you know that sometimes the insecurities of the other guy comes in to play. Patience, honesty and prayer will certainly bring you to the place you need to be at the time you need to be there. Worrying about it only makes it worse.
I wish you all the best and pray that you find inner peace.

7:17 pm
July 6, 2005


chickyfighter

New Member

posts -1

Regret, Oh my goodness, you are so good for sharing that story. I know in heart that he's changing slowly, and I am afarid to close up to hope, although I see changes and I know it is not just wishful wishing. I do believe that we were both for our own reasons afraid to committ, but my heart is too soft for him. I hate missing him b/c my best guy friend told me yesterday to forget him and start seeing other people instead of waiting on him. That he would never change and that him giving me keys to the house is not a big deal, (although initially when I thought it was not a big deal, he was the one to make such a big deal about it from a guys perspective) anyway, I am thinking of emailing him to tell him to let him know that I hate thinking I am the only one who cares so much while he probably does not even care. I don't know I feel like I have so much resentment stored that if I was to let it out, it would take me yrs. to just speak my mind. I have tried soooo hard to not feel, or let it be known and now it's too much to handle. I am going to service tonight. I hate it when I go to church b/c it is then when I feel the most desire to have a husband, (I already have my 2 boys from my marriage 4 yrs ago).Anyhow, you have brought me hope, but again, maybe I should continue to quietly pray about it, and not email him, tiem will tell…
Thanks again, pls. do tell me more about you leaving? what is all that about? Work? do you have any children, previously married? sorry so many questions.

4:25 am
July 7, 2005


Regret

New Member

posts -1

Chickyfighter,
Goodmorning(It is morning where I live but i guess it is still night for you). I hope that you wake up with the peace of the Lord in your heart.
I am studying for a PHD now so I live abroad but I hope to return home next year to take up a position as a Research Fellow at a University. Somehow, lazy as I am, i love research. I have never been matrried. your question made me smile-twice i have had marriage proposals and with the last one, we had started making preparations when the guy backed out.(His mom did not want him to marry a foreigner- didn't matter that we come from the same continent.) It is a wonder that I am still able to open my heart to love again. I have an adopted daughter. She is the daughter of my uncle but she liked me so much that her parents sent her to our house when she was only two-three years old and she has been with us since. Now, she is mine and I love her to bits. She lives with my parents now that I am out of my country.
New boyfriend is a student too. In an earlier post, I mentioned the fact that I am older than him etc and all my fears. Well, somehow, they are being put to rest and daily, I just tell God that I don't know but He does so He should have control.
My friend, I don't want to offer you false hope but I also think it is unfair to dismiss what might mean a lot to one person(your partner) as insignificant. Let us be practical here. Let us assume for a moment that this guy is cheating on you. He is likely to have a picture, a note from the other woman, a left other piece of item you name it, from her. So he leaves you the key to his room and you stay over there so you can find them? You think that is what he would do? I don't think so. I have friends whose exs used to tell them not to pick the phone when it rung for example- a clear indication that they had issues to hide. Let us also consider this: would you ever leave the keys to your house to someone you do not trust? I wouldn't especially if i was going abroad. These things may seem little but I consider them big. He has allowed you into his space even if it is not a committed relationship. For some, committment comes slowly while for others, it comes in fast.I have a lot of male friends and they all conclude that if a guy gives you access to his house especially in his absence, it means you mean a great deal to him.
On another thread, I mentioned that I wanted to hear my boyfriend say that he loves me and i had some wonderful advice. Some said I had to ask him whilst others suggested that I look at his actions. I thought about it a great deal and decided to do both. Then we talked about it and he said to me "XXX, love for me, is something that comes over time. Of course I love you as my dear friend etc, I care deeply about you but to get to that point where I can tell you I love you in the way you want, i need sometime. Will you be there when I need you the most, when i am sick, hurt, broke, …." I have come to understand that as different people, we have different paces and I just need to give him his time. He has in these few months, shown me things that a lot of the guys i was with did not show me. I have keys to his house; i sleep there when i want; we make plans together etc and I am happy. He is abroad now and he sent me a text message this morning saying " Baby, I am sorry I didn't call you yesterday but I have been very busy. I want you to know that even though I am buys, your are still right here in my heart". I will tell you this because you are a christian- unconditional love can and does conquer all. Even if he is not the one, you would emerge a stronger and not broken person because you loved him not really expecting anything back-of course, i don't mean that he can do whatever he wants whilst you passively love him.
Insecurity forces some people to hold back a lot. What kind of past does he have? What kind of home was he brought up in? What is his belief? All these come to play. My boyfriend grew up without a father. He grew up being discriminated against even by those who were family because he is mixed. His ex girlfriend cheated on him. Can you really blame him if he is scared to trust? We talk, we pray and i am learning ways to be a better person so that no matter what happens, i will leave him better than I found him. Sometimes, if you dig deep, you realise that it is not you, it is his past that gets in the way. Pray for him. Commit your search for a partner to the Lord- I think this should be a general thing and not specific to the person you are with and ask that the purpose for you being with this person be manifest to you. I would say hold off that email for now. Even if you would want to talk to him about it, I think it would be better to do it face-to face. You would need him physically to assess his body language etc and so would he.
And my dear, I understand the loneliness especially in church etc but your value in the sight of God is not measured by a ring on your finger. I know you know this. It will all come in its time.
Hugs and best wishes to you for the day!

5:06 am
July 7, 2005


revelation

New Member

posts -1

Hi Guys!

Maybe you won't appreciate me butting in, but I thought you might like to hear another perspective…

chicky you wrote:
"I am thinking of emailing him to tell him to let him know that I hate thinking I am the only one who cares so much while he probably does not even care"

I'd like to know what you are hoping to gain from this…are you hoping to get a reaction from this? Or is it simply to get something of your chest? Think about this…and ask yourself honestly what the reason is. If its the latter, if you are thinking of e-mailing just to get a reaction (and if you are going over in your head what you think he might say back) then this is control and manipulation….you are trying to control what he thinks and what he says, a typical codependent trait.

To both of you I'd like to just maybe give a little fresh persective on dating. Guys don't have to say they "love" you…but if you can't feel it…iif you don't see it in how they behave towards you…if you don't feel you are a priority in their lives, if you don't feel their respect for you every day…then you are giving your love away for nothing.
In most cases, if I guy is not "into you" at the start then its highly unlikely that is going to change.

Hope I haven't offended, hope I haven't been harsh…just wanted to give my perspective. I have wasted a lot of time in my life obsessing and trying to manipulate men into being in love with me…it only caused me more pain. I'd hate for anyone else to go through this.

xx,
Rev.

9:35 am
July 7, 2005


Regret

New Member

posts -1

Rev.,
Right on. I don't think you have been harsh at all. Your point was well made and very apt.
Thanks, Regret

10:30 am
July 7, 2005


Anonymous

New Member

posts -1

Chicky, great question. I often do not want to stay the night at men's houses. I guess for me, that is a pretty intimate thing and very "relationship" like. For the most part, most men I know do not like it when women stay at their house. I think when you are really into someone, then it might not be so bad, but besides that part, when you are just starting to get to know someone, I don't always think it is the best thing.

Of course sleep overs are fun, but sometimes you get closer to the person when you stay over.

I for one get very uncomfortable with men staying at my place as well.

12:22 am
July 8, 2005


chickyfighter

New Member

posts -1

Regret, I soooo appreciate all that you have shared. I a had the talk w/him, he said if I need to move on, I should. He cannot give me what I want right now. I realize that God does things 4 a reason. I talked w/my best guy freind about this, and I had to ask what am I to expect? I always knew the answer he has never been shady and I admire him for that. I had a realtionship right b4 him where the guy was in love w.me like I am w/S but he gave up on me b/c I was not ready to give him ALL of what he wanted, I was willing to give as much as I was ready to at the time, and I wanted to be loved for just being me, and so I lost his friendship even, and I don't want to do that to S, and I emailed him b/c when we had the talk it hurt like hell to hear him say that I should move on, b/c he could not give me the answer he wanted me to give him, b/c he did not know what the future helf himslef, so anyway. He said what you said abpout trusting me w/what is most precious to him right ow, his home. I am Christian so I told him I love him unconditonally but I am glad we have our boundaries well drawn now. I wish you the best w/your bf. Thanks again so very much you are so good for sharing this w/me!!! God bless!!
Aces, thanks for the input, I also hear what you are saying Rev, but I am beyond that. But your input is appreciated!! Thanks again!

3:11 am
July 8, 2005


Regret

New Member

posts -1

My Darlyn Cyber Friend,
I just wish I could draw you to me and give you a long warm hug. Give yourself one and take deep breaths. I can truly identify with your feelings. All I can say to you is that good things come to those that wait. As you wait on the Lord, I have no doubts that you will find what you need. In a way, I am happy that S has been honest with you. What if he told you what you needed to hear but did not mean it. You will get through this. In the meantime, please keep the focus on asking God for what He knows you need and not what you want. Sometimes, we really do not need what we want. Sometimes, we have to wait for what we want to be transformed into what we need. Either way, if we learn to wait, we will have the best.
Have a great day my dear and keep hope alive.
Regret

8:16 am
July 8, 2005


chickyfighter

New Member

posts -1

Regret, I realize in times like this that I have no true friends close, one that is many states away, and I love him dearly but it's hard for me to trust. I pray I will not go to the many acquaintances (guys) I know for refuge, b/c I feel so alone and I know I want nothing to do w/any of them. I am hurting, but I emailed S to tell him I offer him my friendship, and unconditonal love, and I am glad we are clear, and I thanked him for his honesty.
Regret, I am not sure where you are in the world, but I so wish we could share more info on here sometimes. I appreciate you so cyber friend, God bless you!

10:29 am
July 8, 2005


Regret

New Member

posts -1

Chicky,
I so much can feel your pain. Reading your post jolted memories of my life before me. Although probably younger than you, I run really hard and fast with my love life. When I was low, i ended up with "sex stories"- this is a name i coined which meant a guy is just a sexual partner-no strings, nothing. At the end, it left me more hollow and even more hurt. The journey to recovery was slow and painful but somehow, I have gotten to this point.
My dear friend, I understand the pain of loneliness and how vulnerable we can become. Please hold on. The refuge the guy friends will give would only be temporary and at the end of it, it would leave you hurting much more.Of course I am here to listen to you and write to you ANYTIME you feel like sharing, venting, whatever.I live in Italy which means if you are in the States, then we have different time zones. However, if you need to talk at a paticular time of the night, let me know on a thread and I will sit up to listen and write back ok? I wish I could take away the pain but I know after you deal with this, you will also emerge stronger. Concentrate on yourself my dear and the good things about you. I will post some things on liberation brew for you so please read it.

Hugs to you!!!

6:42 pm
July 8, 2005


chickyfighter

New Member

posts -1

Regret, I did something aweful lat nuight, and I was scared as I did it b/c I knew it was the last thing I would do to cope w/pain. I went to the gym, that has always been my drug, and I cried hard for everything. My little boys are w/their father for this moneth, and I miss them and it killed to hear the oldest even contemplate the thought of living w/his dad. Although he did say, naw, I don't want to, but a long visit is great. Anyway then the next day I had that talk w/S. I also have to get my license for work so I have to pass this exam, if I don't pass I will be demoted! Anyway I went from the gym to the liquor store, and I had a big nasty drink b/c I knew I would not fall asleep if I was not totally gone, there was too much on my mind and I needed to get up for work, and drive 1 hr each way, and study….I hated myself for doing that, that is also when I emailed him, and I have not heard from him. I feel so horrible…
This is my email, please tell me what you think. "I am glad we had the talk, thanks for being honest, it hurt like hell, but this too shall pass, I just needed peace b/t us, w/in me.
I finally realize what it is I wanted from you, sorry maybe I expected more than I know no man can give me…..
S, I always wanted to hear you verbalize that you'd always be there, that you'd have my back, always…Is there such thing as loving w/o strings attached? maybe I have wanted to have my cake and eat it too, as much a you, only that the monogomy on your part was a big deal to me. I know that if you had ever wanted to make me committ to you, I would have ran the other way, but my monogomy I was willing to give U, hope I am being clear.
I am not sure if this will make sense, but I want you to understand why I hung w/u knowing that you r where u are. Once, b4 you, I met someone who loved me about as much as I love you. As much as he said he loved me, and I welcomed it, I was not ready for anything more than what I gave him, which was so much more than anyone ever had gotten from me, (sound familiar?) Maybe that is why I accepted you just exactly where u are.
However, I vowed I would never do to you what he did to me, and that was to be selfish, to not see potential, to give up on the core of what made me care about him, the fact that he was my friend above all things. Once he & I had the talk, like the one U & I had today, for the 3rd time, he finally gave up, he moved on. I told him to. … but in my heart I just wanted him to be happy even if it meant w/o me. I wished he would have stuck around b/c I was beginning to trust, but I had to let go, he deserved more. What killed was that he could not be my friend anymore, now that I missed very much.
S, I love you beyond the flesh, I see your potential. I love you just as you are. No, I am not saying that once you come home I want to share you, sexually. but I am saying that I am bigger than all things and I know God put me in your path for a reason, you are a good person, just like me, we are simply in the place we are and I love you just like that. I don't expect you to change, for me, never did! b/c change comes b/c you r aready, not b/c anyone wants you to be. You know true love is when you accept and care w/o asking the person to change. Be happy, I love you unconditonally, I will always have your back :)
I wanted to wait 4 our talk until my boards, Funny now, I popped that conversation, I pray that God will finish all good things that he started in us both. w/u work in Sweden, (did I ever tell u I admire your desire to succeeed!!!Boy that is so sexy! :) me, my boards and all the other million things going on, In the name of Jesus, Amen.
Have a beautiful most blessed day! Thanks again,"
Regret, I think you are 8 hrs. ahead of me right? well, thanks for offering to be there, I need that sense of somone caring. I felt so great early this AM after listening to Paula White, encounter w/God, but then as the day went on, I needed more, and so here I am, about to run to the gym again. A friend wants me to model w/him and do a fitness show, I think I will, I have always wanted to do a fitness show, I practically have lived at the gym anyway, and lately I have lost my passion for that. Well, tell me when are you moving? where are you moving to? I want to know you…if that is coool w/u. Take care!
hugs!
T

10:15 am
July 9, 2005


Rasputin

New Member

posts 0

Hi Chicky,

I am sorry for the disappointment that took place between you and S. The fact that he gave you his apartment/home keys speaks volumes. It says that he trusts you, respects you and that you are honest and trustworthy person!

You know what honey. I respect S so much for his honesty with you when you asked him point blank to tell you the future of your relationship. At least he was honest. Other men could lie and paly games, he was hoenst. He sounds like respectful decent man!

Honey, I would take advantage of this obscure shady time to tap into God, get filled by Him, become a better person spiritually and work on my growth and evolution instead of waiting for things to change according to my liking. I know waiting is soooooo frustrating, nobody likes it, esp in this fast-paced ag. I myself hate waiting!!!
Then, I guarantee sweetie, you will become strong enough to love the right person and say no to anything that was not meant to you.

Read my post in the "No Contact Club" of last week dated I think 3 July. I saw my male friend in the park, and tell me honestly what you think about it. Please type your answer in that thread. People here commended me for my bahavior, it was not easy to do what I did. However, thru prayers and staying connected with my sweet lovely cyber friends, I was able to DO IT!!! I really felt like talking to him, yet I was angry at his bahavior. Honey, you can do it too!!!

Give me your opinion. You know I find you a smart person. Do not worry about the flaws you have, you will grow. Remember it is work in progress.

I love you sweetie so much, I always pray to God that He will make us fall in love with the right guy for us. In this way, it will save us soooooooo much heartache and time!!!Right?!

~XOXOXO~ RAS

12:14 pm
July 9, 2005


chickyfighter

New Member

posts -1

Rs, I am not clear on what you said. First it sounds like you think I should be happy about the fact he left me the keys,,,what does that matter if he doesn't care!!! I thought about remaining friends and that is why I emailed that crazy email but now I want to join the no contact club at least 'til I heal, but I have the keys to his house. It would be easier to do to him what my ex bf did to me and that is to exile me from his life completely. I am bigger than that. I do know S is a wonderful humna being, as much as I am. He is like I was, just not ready to give more. God all I wanted was to be loved regardless, I just needed time, patience, no rules…I am doing the same thing to him now, by feeling like "well, if he does not want me I don't even want the friendship b/c I am hurting and I no longer care about you!"
Ras, I have to overcome all this, I need God to guide me, but believe me, I will return to being a hard core bitch again. Everyone is so amazed that I would give that kind of power to a man like I did to S and I amaze myself, after my ex husband I had never fallen so hard, and trust me, S is the last person I allow myself to have done this stupid emotional s**t with!!
Rs thans so much for the love, Keep up the no contact club w/your guy! I am so proud of you too!

1:13 pm
July 9, 2005


Rasputin

New Member

posts 0

Honey, I do not like to sugarcoat my words. I could have said what you would like to hear. Rather, I prefer to tell people the truth about their situation.

Ask yourself: Do you want your will OR God's will? The former leads to misery and regret even if it many look like happiness at the start; the latter leads to true happiness joy, fulfillment…

If S is the right person, he will contact you whether it's now or later. In the meantime, keep your focus on God and self-improvement. Honey this is the best investment you can give to yourself.

Chicky, do Not give up on love. Forgive S. If you hold on grudge, you will only destroy yourself. Honey, God has a wonderful plan for your life. If you harden your heart, how can you grow in faith, see His plan for you, & become healthy person. Please Chicky, live your life on ongoing forgiveness to S,
X hubby and every one else.

Join No Contact Club, it will empower you as it to me, and do not forget to read my post there on 4 July! See u there! ~Ras~

2:42 pm
July 9, 2005


chickyfighter

New Member

posts -1

I did read your post Tas, I commended you, I am so proud of you. Ras, I know me enough to know that anger is healthy, I get angry b/c I don't want to be in denial anymore. I have gotten to the acceptance stage the ex, he was/is a sad soul and I forgave, cannot forget b/c he comes and goes…I only pray that he will not hurt the boys in the long run (which I can tell he is doing already by seeing them only when it is convenient 4 him and his new family). About S I am angry still at me mostly b/c he was never a liar, and I am working on the acceptance stage, I need so much love from God, and to learn to love me abaove all things. I refuse to betray myself again, and if I need to stay angry at the world for a littl bit, that's OK, I have the right to. I just want to be accepted and loved for being me, flawed as I am. Thanks Ras, and again, I also do see my potential, I am bigger than any weapon formed againts me, and I can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens me!
Love ya sister, I will chat w/you tomorrow, got run! be blessed!

9:45 am
July 10, 2005


Regret

New Member

posts -1

Chicky,
I am sorry I was not there when you wrote. I had an emergency with a friend of mine who is having a breakdown b/c she caught her bf cheating on her. I came in to check mails etc but have to run to the hospital now.

I have read your email and I don't think that it is crazy. I don't know about joining the no contact club because I personally have stayed friends with almost all my exes. I must admit however, that I went into no contact with one for about two months. I am not sure how you feel right now apart from the hurt. Are you angry with S? I am praying from here for you and will get back to you soon ok? However, I don't think the letter was bad or crazy. You have let your feelings out in the public- if he wants this, he will take it otherwise, he will begin to work on himself to have you back. It might not happen today or tommorrow but then, in God's own time, that too would pass.
Hold on my dear friend, bad times never last forever.


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