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On prozac, but still struggling with depression

UserPost

2:00 pm
January 31, 2005


jamaicanwife

New Member

posts -1

I have recently discovered this board, and it has been a great outlet for me. When I visit and just read what other people are going through, I feel that I am not alone. I have struggled with loneliness all my life, and it is such a relief to 'be' among people who get that, who really understand what is going on in my head.

Over the last year or so as I have read useful books and spoken to counsellors, I have come to realize that I am codependent as a result of my abusive father. As I have tried to come to terms with my own role in my unhappiness, I have seen great improvement in my relationship with my husband and my mother, and I have started taking prozac for persistent, long-term depression.

I am now at the point where I have stopped seeing improvement; I am having great difficulty with my work responsibilities, and I find myself really struggling to keep things together. I know that letting things slide is one of the first outward signs that I am depressed, and the self-loathing this causes triggers an even deeper depression. I am really fighting to keep from slipping off the rails, but I am not feeling very strong; it was a long, hard weekend.

I am afraid to talk to my doctor, because I don't want to take a higher dose of prozac – I'm ashamed enough already, plus I've already got mild side effects, and I don't want any more. I know that I shouldn't feel ashamed, but I do, and that's just the truth. I feel weak because I couldn't pull it together without medication, and I hate the idea that I might need more.

I would appreciate some really practical suggestions. Also, I found some phone numbers for CODA meetings near me on the internet, but I haven't called yet. Would these meetings be helpful?

3:50 pm
January 31, 2005


on my way

New Member

posts -1

CODA meetings would be very helpful, and I don't know how long you have ben on Prozac, but were you diagnosed correctly, was there any mention of bipolar along with the depression? It could also be a thing of switching anti-depressants, depending on how long you have been on the Prozac? Just thoughts, I am not an expert on meds.

4:11 pm
January 31, 2005


memphis

New Member

posts -1

Do you pray?

4:42 pm
January 31, 2005


jamaicanwife

New Member

posts -1

onmyway: I've been on Prozac for less than 2 months. I know that it takes a while before you feel any effect, but I was feeling better even 5 days ago.

As I write this, I wonder if it could have something to do with my hormones. I will look it up on the net.

memphis: Not as much as I should. When I start to slide, I get so caught up in my struggle against depression that I forget to pray. When I do remember, it's been days since I turned to God.

When I start to feel low, I turn in on myself, and think that if God really loved me, he would have protected me from all the bad things that have happened to me. I feel unloveable, not even God could love me.

I feel a bit like that now, especially since I've been sitting here at work not achieving anything for the last 4 hours.

4:55 pm
January 31, 2005


on my way

New Member

posts -1

hormones, maybe depends on your age though. I would still let your dr. know. Tell him/her that you don't want to increase the dosage, (i don't blame you, i wouldn't either)but that you don't expect to feel depressed after taking Prozac, and ask what their suggestions are. Could be time for a blood test for hormone count.

The reason I meenitoned bipolar…did you notice an imeediate effect when you started Prozac or did it take a couple of weeks to notice a difference? If right away, you may be bipolar in wich case you might need a mood stabalizer as well. All new for me, I swore I would never take anything..but I just started meds for bipolar/depressed. I do feel better.

5:07 pm
January 31, 2005


memphis

New Member

posts -1

Dear Jamacan Wife

Then I will remember to pray for you! God loves you and you will come out of this stronger than you were before.

5:21 pm
January 31, 2005


jamaicanwife

New Member

posts -1

Thank you both for your comments and advice. I will have to see my doctor in another week, so I will discuss it with him then.

And thanks for the kind words, memphis.

5:26 pm
January 31, 2005


jamaicanwife

New Member

posts -1

on my way: just looked up bipolar disorder. I don't think it applies to me – I was deeply unhappy for most of my life, no times when I felt up or happy. The first time I felt happy I was about 30 years old, and I didn't even recognize the feeling!

By the way, I'm 35, with PMS that seems to last 2 weeks.

5:46 am
December 21, 2013


Edward Fruitman

New York City, Manhattan, Long Island

Member

posts 23

Post edited 1:23 am – June 4, 2014 by ShiningLight


Tending towards spirituality will take you away from depression. If you get closer to your religion, it will take you out of the problems you have been facing in controlling yourself during depressive periods.


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